Hi Inamess -<P>No, you're not nuts!! You're just going through some very painful life lessons and growth pains.....<P>He is not going to come up smelling like a rose either!! You have learned that HONESTY is the cement that keeps the foundation together for a GOOD relationship - this guy is not being honest with his wife! How much rebuilding can he accomplish? How will his relationship survive without cement in the foundation cracks? <P>Don't rage about him Renee, he's not improving himself at all....he is not facing up to his wife and is not even taking steps to correct why he cheated in the first place!! If he doesn't address the whys with her - they are both going to have one hell of a rollercoaster life!!!<P>THANK GOD that you are not a part of his mess!!! THANK GOD that you and your H can be honest and (although painful for the moment) both want to take care of what led you to stray...with those problems dealt with - there will be no stopping the wonderful marriage you can create and enjoy!!!<P>You and H WILL get through this - much better than that other guy and his wife.<BR>Not only better, but as stronger, happier and more bonded than ever before!!!<P>Don't worry about slipping and contacting OM. It happened...realize that you only hurt yourself more and slowed down you and H a little - then don't do it again!!! As far as your friend saying "you only live once" - to those who say things like that it is good to respond "Yeah, and I want to do it right"!!!!!!<P>BIG HUGS and forget OM - he has a lot of garbage he is dumping onto himself and onto his wife......be very grateful to be out of that mess!!!!!<P>Prayers and Strength,<P>Sheba