Hi,
Just was thinking we BSs should write the "WS Quote Book" So when our WSs spout some gem of FOG BABBLE we can look it up, reference it, and see it for just what it is; BABBLE that has been quoted by every WS since time began. Here are a few to start:

Don't I deserve happiness.
Our problems don't have anything to do with OP.
I have to MOVE ON, you should too.

Just a few here, help me with more. I have to get to work.

Thanks,
S

I'm trying to forget the babble, but
"I don't remember"
is the biggie for me.

Hmmm... It's been quite a while since I heard any WS babble... TTGIR: "I don't remember" is one of my all time 'favorites' <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />

How about these:

"I would NEVER do anything like that (have an affair). Don't you TRUST me?"

"It was just sex."

"He's just a friend."

"I didn't enjoy being with the OM."

"We didn't have sex... why are you so angry?"

"That happened so long ago, why can't you just get over it?"

...anyway...

Semper Fi,
RIF90

We had problems before OW...
I needed attention....
Nobody understands me except for her...
Just a few
Layli

Love talk is the same everywhere, as is Leave talk.

I love you but I'm not in love with you

I just don't know if I want to be married anymore

There is no one else..How could you THINK that of me??!!

I don't think I EVER loved you.

"The Ow is a kind gentle honest person.
OK,well, yeah, not her OWN H or kids but she is to me."

I haven't been happy for a long time.
I haven't been happy for about a year.
I haven't been happy for a short while.
I wasn't REALLY unhappy at all.
I was Happy with you until I met her..but she has nothing to with this.

I never meant to hurt you..I was lying when I said I never loved you...But I never meant that to hurt you.

Oh..I could go on and on

Almost forgot about this one.... (this was after I found out about OM#4)...

"I know how I've hurt you in the past. I would NEVER hurt you like that again. How can you even suspect that I'd cheat on you again?"

Here are some more recent comments:

"I've told you everything."

"There's nothing else to tell... why can't you just believe me?"

"You never loved me... why don't you just divorce me?"

"How can we have a marraige when you won't trust me?"

Thankfully, we've moved past all of the WS babble... My heart goes out to all of the BS that are still hearing stuff like this...

Semper Fi,
RIF90

here's my favorite....

"you'd really like her" HELLO?????

another favorite

" I don't remember" PPPFFFTTTTTTT

How about-

"I love you like a sister not a wife- and I wouldn't treat my sister as badly as I have you"!!!!!

"Its not you its all my fault"-and then proceed to tell you all the things they perceive as wrong in you but won't let you demonstrate any change
Jante

hi,
I'm back. I thought of a few more, amazingly I was just talking to a friend who's brother is doing this to his wife, both our spouses said:

"I haven't been happy for five years" what is it about 5 yrs? Is it a MAGIC # that if you say you've been unhappy that long it sounds okay, like your spouse will say "oh, 5 yrs. that is a long time to be unhappy I guess you're right.

"I don't know what I want, but I think this is the thing that might finally make me happy, if I don't do this I'll always wonder if it was."

"Why do you have to keep dragging me down into this" To which I usually reply "Because I love you",his reply "Do we have to go through this again."

"This is all too painful and stressful for me." Of course is it great fun for me and the kids.

One of my favorites:
"The kids are getting older, they don't need me as much anymore."

"You'll be married soon anyway."

"Do I have to be miserable all my life?"

"Do I have to do something just because it's the right thing to do?"
OH so many more. But guess what I bet you've heard them all or a close variation.
Thanks,
S

I personally enjoy, "it's not you, it's me.." and then he follows it by telling me everything in in the marriage I have done wrong, how it's all my fault, etc.

or-
"you drove me to her"

"I'm so confused", followed by, "I don't think I love you", followed by "I can't stand the OW", followed by "She is my soulmate", followed by "she just a friend, what's the problem!"

and finally
"Why are you so jealous?"

??????????????????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!????????

Oh, I just remembered this gem:
"I persued her she didn't persue me!"
This during a discussion that I THINK was meant to make me feel better. DIDN'T WORK....OUCH!!
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

my favorite quote was actually from OW...she said "our affair has nothing to do with you, we both love you so much. We said to each other that we can't do this to P, we can't hurt her like that." Talk about FOG!!
BH

The stupidest one I heard (and I was subjected to many) was:

We have so much more in common. We were both valedictorians!

I had to laugh at some of them!! Are these WS for real???
A recent one I got was
"There's a better life for me out there than the one with you".
Now that's pretty painful

The "it's not you, it's me" phrase is used when he wants to leave, but when he expects you to say that it is your fault and you want to change yourself etc. If it is him and not you then there is nothing you can do to stop him and he has his escape.

"You can say what you want about her but you don't know her"

......Yer, she's a saint !!

"She was non-judgemental, she heard me out, she listened"

......That always makes an impression.

"Those feelings ,just aren't back yet"

"I'm just taking one day at a time"

......His response to the MC on where our
relationship was going.

"I never thought I was good enough for you"

......mmm Maybe some truth in that one.

"I don't know how it happened, it just happened"

......Yep just like you trip over someone
and have sex with them.

"I don't think she has loved her husband for very long time"

"I told her I didn't love you anymore"

.......Well, telling her different isn't
going to light her fire is it.
"I was starting to forget her until you brought it up"

He told someone else......
"I could have spent the rest of my life with her"
"There were feelings there"

.......I say, why didn't ya ?????????

Think I've reflected enough on this time in hell !!

A couple of my favorites:

"You know I would never do anything to hurt you".

"There wasn't anything in our wedding vows that said I had to stay with you forever".

"You're still the same wonderful man I married, it's me who changed".

In the last week in order of occurrence:

"I do love the OM. Explicitly. I know you dont like that...but that is where my heart stands.
Nothing can change that..not the grief you are causing me, not anything"

"I do not want you to keep bothering me Mike. I want to be left alone. I want to go on with my life. You need to do the same. I am part of your past. Dont live in the past. Let me go. Let me enjoy the happiness that I have found."

"Like I'm supposed to tell you the truth that I'm miserable"

A classic from a couple of weeks ago:

I told her I lost both her and a belief in friendship (OM use to be my BF).

Her reply: "That was just a bonus."

Some of these things are so sad and hurtful. I remember the one that I think hurts and sticks with me most.

"You know I would never do anything to intentionally hurt you." <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

This from a man who has hurt me, intentionally, more that ANYONE ever has. Affairs don't JUST HAPPEN our WSs make them happen!! This from the man who I told you before said, "I presuded her, she didn't persue me". It's so crazy, so sad.
Love to all,
S

<small>[ August 31, 2002, 10:37 AM: Message edited by: uteconf footballwidow ]</small>