I was just wondering if anyone could relate any experiences they've had with Dr. Harley's radio show on Wednesdays. Has anyone listened in on the internet? Has anyone called up and asked a question while Dr. Harley was doing the weekly radio show on his wife's program? A moderator suggested I could ask my question during the radio program, and I was just wondering if anyone had had any experience with that. Thanks for responses.

wow--no takers on this one? bump, bumpity bump

I called and spoke to him once a few years ago when he had his own show. This was while I was listening on the internet.

You have to remember it is NOT a counseling session and not for going into great detail.

Hello Asgoodasitgets,

I called in a few weeks ago. As Chris says it is really not a counseling session. You only have a few minutes to share your situation. His thoughts were right on key in that he stated that my WH has character flaws and sometimes these never leave (especially if the person doesn't actively pursue change), and that some marriages are so damaging and destructive that they aren't worth saving.

I have to admit that this information was crushing to me. Although the facts of the existence of these character flaws can't be denied, nor can the power of God to move and work for the ultimate good of our families to include the WS.

Calling in will give you little nuggets of information and advice but it does not take the place of counselling.

God Bless you,

WS

Thanks for the posts, this helped a lot. I am not looking for a freebie counseling session, I generally want to know if MB principles will work for me in my situation, which is not the "normal" WS and A.

Thanks for sharing your experience, WS, that the counsel you received was "crushing." Brave of you to share that. This is something I fear as well, that I'll be told that WH is into behaviors so deeply entrenched, that if he doesn't want to change, the M stands little chance of recovery.

More importantly, the issue for me is that I have heard this from enough people by now, I want to know why I won't listen. But that's for another post.

Asgoodasitgets,

I will never regret the stand that I am taking regarding my marriage. It is worth it. There are days when I want to give up, but somehow God renews my strength.

I never thought I'd have to deal with anger issues, addiction to gambling and an A. Many have advised me to give up, that I can do better, but I have chosen to take the high road, which requires me to suffer for righteousness sake while God works things out in my life and my husband's life. To give up is easy or so it seems, but then no choice is simple. IMHO the benefits are greater for my overall family if I give God an opportunity to deliver us from those things that have us trapped in addictive behaviors (me, I am codependent). I am notorious for trying to fix, manage and control everything. My WH is used to women in his family doing this very thing.

I pray that you will not feel bad about wanting to save your marriage regardless of the situation.

God is really the only one who knows the fate of our marriages. All he requires us to do is to have faith in HIM. To believe that He has our best interest and those of our WS and families in mind. He remembers us, and will bless us. (Psalm 115:12)

I love this site.

May God Bless you,

WR

I generally want to know if MB principles will work for me in my situation, which is not the "normal" WS and A.
Just because it is same sex doesn't mean everything else isn't the same.

So many people come here and think their situation is so unique, so unlike any other possibly could be only to find out (sadly) that theirs is FAR, FAR from different. There have been a few in your situation here.

There may be a few things different but generally, Plan A/B are to be done according to Harley.

Well burst my bubble!! And here I thought I was special . . . That said, though, I have seen various responses here at the forum regarding an individual's ability to commit to heterosexuality if homosexual desires are felt. I profess to be no expert on these matters, of course. I only know the ravages of my own heart, but that of course is not unique. So I won't bother to ask Harley. I suppose I'll Plan A or even Plan B again and continue to live with the lies. Live the sham my life has become. But that's another thread . . .