well, WS was gone for some time now. Her EA is over. She seems to be moving on. Don't see any indication of her having emotional problems or thoughts of us getting back together.

I seem to be doing ok. Not as bad anymore, just occassional depression (while watching Notting Hill last night for example or looking at our pictures).

Daughter is w/me, single daddy. She (18 monhts) misses mommy a lot, even though spends days with her during the week when I am at work.

I attempted moving on to Plan B, but she won't allow. Wants to talk to me directly. Does not listen to why I need to go to Plan B. So, I guess I am not in Plan B, not in Plan A, just floating around somewhere.

All my old (prior to M) habits/skills are coming back. I am once again a great cook, housekeeper, skier, social figure at a lot of gatherings (w/my daughter of course), etc.

I feel like I am doing a good job moving on. Should I? What are some of the signs that she still cares? I don't know anything anymore. Just floating around in this life and going with the flow.....making sure that me and my daughter are taken care of. I even started gaining weight, which has always been my problem. I've been 150 lbs for the last 9 years no matter how much I eat. When she left, I went down to 140 in 3 days and am now at 153??? go figure...

I feel very similar to you. It's been 11 months since my WW left on dday. She's still with OM.

I'm also feeling like I've made great strides in moving forward but feel stuck in many respects.

At times happy for my new life. Then sad about losing my marriage and wife. Feel like she simply gave up before trying to work on our marriage.

I often wonder if WW has the same moments of sadness seeing movies, listing to music that deals with affairs and lost love.

Hang in there.

I attempted moving on to Plan B, but she won't allow. Wants to talk to me directly.
It’s not a matter of her “allowing” anything. It’s a matter of you not talking with her.
When she say, “we have to talk” you don’t respond.
You don’t get into a situation where you have to respond or ignore her.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by goodguy007:
<strong>
At times happy for my new life. Then sad about losing my marriage and wife. Feel like she simply gave up before trying to work on our marriage.

I often wonder if WW has the same moments of sadness seeing movies, listing to music that deals with affairs and lost love.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Yes, I know what you mean. The fact that she would not even try to repair the marriage, she would not talk to our pastor, she would not talk with a marriage counselor, she wouldn't even talk with me, but gave me a letter that she had written beforehand. These facts are even sadder than the affair.

The saddest part of this is that someday she will wake up, look at the pain, suffering and damage that has been done and face the fact that she chose this!

At least I will be able to sleep well at that point.

I now realize I can do no more to save my marriage of 20 years. Only God can turn this around. So I will wait, sometimes patiently and sometimes anxiously, to see what he plans for me/us.

feel the exact same way. every time i have a moment, i am thinking does she have moments like that? ever think made a bad decision, get upset, misses me, etc.....

it just kills me that she is not willing to even try and fix the relationship. just does not care.

i feel like a little sensitive emotional girl or like a cold rock with no feelings. i read about people who have been in plan A for 6 months, have been separated for a while,etc. it has not even been 2 months for me. one part of me says "quit that whining and move on" and the other one goes "no, you gotta wait" and then i get an internal response "wait for what? if you keep that hope you'll just get hurt all over again". little sensitive girl means that i am still crying over it and hoping to have my M back way too much, want someone to take care of, to love, to make happy, to entertain, and cuddle at night. the cold rock means that i feel like my rollercoaster has ended (or has it?) way too fast, i am moving on and not really thinking about her, just wishing to have somebody to care for, etc... do i not have a heart, deep feelings for her?

but, i do feel good knowing that i've made a major effort while we were still married and after she left. i know that i'll be able to look into my baby's eyes and tell her "honey, I tried"...

MAN, THIS IS SOOO HARD... i am happy one minute and upset the other... made an offer on a 2 seater roadster to cruise around in the summer... attempts to readjust i guess.

sorry, i am just rambling. it's one of those "sad" moments. i'm gonna take a vacation and just lie around on a beach in hawaii or some place warm i think...