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#1142796 06/04/04 12:04 AM
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I am begining to believe that the action or the verb is not as important...as our internal state of Grace...

so be the action

surrender....

the answer will come with prayer....

I keep telling myself that no matter what comes ahead...
right now I am blessed..more than I deserve...

I fail more than I succeed in my pursuits...
but I try to stay grateful...

JUSTLEARNING....just the fact that you KNOW I am not a he...makes me grateful... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
now if you want a good jello recipe... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

ARK

surrender to God and his Grace first...
the rest will come...or even better..
be revealed as not as difficult as once believed...

#1142797 06/04/04 12:06 AM
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surrender to God's Grace

this works for me.

Thanks

#1142798 06/04/04 12:07 AM
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">surrender to God and his Grace first...
the rest will come...or even better..
be revealed as not as difficult as once believed... </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Ding! Ding! Ding!

And you, Ark, win the prize, <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

for herein lies the true answer.

and I believe that Pep has already surrendered...

It is her love and humility that keeps her in that constant state of surrendering....

Susan

#1142799 06/03/04 01:37 PM
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Just to add another "male" thought. I agree and appreciate all your postings Pep! Pep, Ark keep posting. We love you!

I haven't been posting much lately, I feel too down. Threads like these help the spirits!

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> It is why we have children, they guarentee our immorality because they are part of us. It is just hard to see that in the middle of the lose. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">JL: I think you meant "immortality" not "immorality" <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

#1142800 06/03/04 01:41 PM
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JL: I think you meant "immortality" not "immorality"

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> LOL <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Priceless! Of all people and of all boards!

Susan <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

#1142801 06/03/04 02:11 PM
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EGAD!, where is the hands covering my face graemlin???? Should I edit it or just let people have a laugh? Pep is NEVER going to let me live this down, Heck neither will Susan. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

Pep,

I think you have gotten the right advice and the right idea. Surrender is perhaps the right thought as expressed by everyone here. But, also know that this like everything else takes time. You will find your peace and state of grace, give yourself time to grieve.

God Bless,

JL

#1142802 06/03/04 02:23 PM
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From the sublime -

surrender to
truth
life
circumstances
reality


to the Ridiculous -
surrender to
aging
gravity
human nature


Well, actually all of it is sublime - really, it is.

surrender to God's Grace
this works for me.


After the first page, I was going to ask for more background, but since you have already given it on page two, I will comment.

Once you come to know God, you realize that God knows what will make you the happiest, and the most successful. When you know that, you know that surrender to God is the only way to achieve victory.

In this case - surrender = victory. The only way to reach your full potential.


truth - We modify truth depending on our moods. Is our spouse a kind, loving helpful person, or a mean, spiteful grouch? What's the truth? A little of both? God knows things as they really are, and things as they really will be. Something worth knowing.

life - Does life change us, or do we change life? If our attitude improves, can it alter our state of happiness? Does that change our life?

circumstances - Things are as they really are, and not otherwise. It's good to work with what we have.

reality - You can't work very well with things you don't understand. All these mentioned so far are related.

aging - with plastic surgery, or with wisdom and grace? does surrender mean acceptance?
Can you do it right will all of the above? I love to ask the questions, but I don't always have the answers.

gravity - I keep fighting this one. I think the hole in the ozone layer lets in more gravity nowadays, because it seems harder to do pushups, and I notice when I hike it is harder to walk up the hills.

human nature - and this one. My nature is to be lazy..... to get angry when I don't like something, and to be grumpy when things don't go my way. I think I can change these over time. My wife is betting on it - thank goodness she hasn't given up on me.

I also think highly of Pepperband - and.........I won't name all of you, but a great many of the folks I love and respect on MB have posted on this thread. Thanks to all of you.

I'll add another one to surrender to - and I think you gals (and guys - the ones I know anyway,) have done a good job with this one.

Humor

SS

<small>[ June 03, 2004, 02:28 PM: Message edited by: still seeking ]</small>

#1142803 06/03/04 02:30 PM
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Pep, I too thank you for all the great work that you do.

How about this...surrender to happiness BY surrendering those things that prevent it.

Oftentimes we actually prevent our own happiness by refusing to surrender things like our own resentment
pain
past
insecurity
fear

#1142804 06/03/04 03:08 PM
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by star*fish:

How about this...surrender to happiness BY surrendering those things that prevent it.

Oftentimes we actually prevent our own happiness by refusing to surrender things like our own resentment
pain
past
insecurity
fear</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">OK ... very nice...

I am resentment free at the moment... but not pain-free... because I am grieving... and I suppose I must surrender to my grief and let myself swim in it for awhile.

Like I said, this grief reaction kicks me out of the blue sometimes... and I just let go and cry like a hungry baby with dirty diapers <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

I LOVE what SS said....

surrender to humor... I am good at that! Thinking of myself in diapers made me LOL <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Pep

#1142805 06/03/04 03:21 PM
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pep - Surrender to the grief and wallow in it. Then cry and cry and cry some more.

You have lost someone you love. It is normal to grieve, but our society teaches us differently.

I lost my dear friend and roommate to cancer 15 years ago. I still think about her everyday. I cried till I had no tears. Time has softened the pain, but not eliminated it. Mostly now I think of the happier times.

#1142806 06/03/04 03:57 PM
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YOU... the freckle faced redhead in diapers?

This I gotta see! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

#1142807 06/03/04 10:17 PM
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ARC...I'm so sorry for being one of those people who thought that you were a man!! I guess that I associated your name with Noah <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> I humbly apologize for that error. No "man" could have your sensitivity and insight...just kidding JL. You at the top of my list too! Pep is wonderful!!

#1142808 06/03/04 11:33 PM
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I found this 2ple of paragraphs in "The Power of Now" (Eckhart Tolle) 2 be interesting. But before I 2uote here, I want 2 point out that you are one of those people that least requires 2uotes like this. ...maybe it's for me! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

"When there is no way out, there is still always a way *through*. So don't turn away from the pain. Face it. Feel it fully. *Feel* it - don't *think* about it! Express it if necessary, but don't create a script in your mind around it. Give all your attention to the feeling, not to the person, event, or situation that seems to have caused it. Don't let the mind use the pain to create a victim identity for yourself out of it. Feeling sorry for yourself and telling others your story will keep you stuck in suffering. Since it is impossible to get away from the feeling, the only possibility of change is to move into it; otherwise, nothing will shift. So give your complete attention to what you feel, and refrain from mentally labeling it. As you go into the feeling, be intensely alert. At first, it may seem like a dark and terrifying place, and when the urge to turn away from it comes, observe it but don't act on it. Keep putting your attention on the pain, keep feeling the grief, the fear, the dread, the loneliness, whatever it is. Stay alert, stay present - present with your whole Being, with every cell of you body. As you do so, you are bringing a light into this darkness. This is the flame of your consciousness."

Pep, you've brought so much light in2 ol' 2long's darkness over the past 2ple of years with your concise, 2 the point, thoughtful, insightful, compassionate posts.

Thanks loads! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

-ol' 2long

<small>[ June 03, 2004, 11:35 PM: Message edited by: 2long ]</small>

#1142809 06/03/04 11:34 PM
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OH GREAT! JL just gave the next batch of WS's a whole new justification for infidelity. "I had to do it, I have kids". <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

#1142810 06/04/04 10:01 AM
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I love this part!

"When there is no way out, there is still always a way *through*. So don't turn away from the pain. Face it. Feel it fully. *Feel* it - don't *think* about it! Express it if necessary, but don't create a script in your mind around it. Give all your attention to the feeling, not to the person, event, or situation that seems to have caused it.

This makes the feeling blameless. The feeling simply "is what it is". Therefore, my feeling belongs to me. I own it. I am responsible for it. And this is empowering.

Like they say in the Al Anon meetings...

"over our own lives"


Don't let the mind use the pain to create a victim identity for yourself out of it.

Lisa.... are you reading here too? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Feeling sorry for yourself and telling others your story will keep you stuck in suffering. Since it is impossible to get away from the feeling, the only possibility of change is to move into it; otherwise, nothing will shift. So give your complete attention to what you feel, and refrain from mentally labeling it.

Puting a lable on feelings gives one the false sense of being able to control those feelings.

As you go into the feeling, be intensely alert. At first, it may seem like a dark and terrifying place, and when the urge to turn away from it comes, observe it but don't act on it. Keep putting your attention on the pain, keep feeling the grief, the fear, the dread, the loneliness, whatever it is.

Very Zen like.

Stay alert, stay present - present with your whole Being, with every cell of you body. As you do so, you are bringing a light into this darkness. This is the flame of your consciousness."

This is just soooo beautiful.

Thanks buddy.

Pep

#1142811 06/04/04 10:38 AM
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<strong> "When there is no way out, there is still always a way *through*. So don't turn away from the pain. Face it. Feel it fully. *Feel* it - don't *think* about it! Express it if necessary, but don't create a script in your mind around it. Give all your attention to the feeling, not to the person, event, or situation that seems to have caused it. Don't let the mind use the pain to create a victim identity for yourself out of it. Feeling sorry for yourself and telling others your story will keep you stuck in suffering. Since it is impossible to get away from the feeling, the only possibility of change is to move into it; otherwise, nothing will shift. So give your complete attention to what you feel, and refrain from mentally labeling it. As you go into the feeling, be intensely alert. At first, it may seem like a dark and terrifying place, and when the urge to turn away from it comes, observe it but don't act on it. Keep putting your attention on the pain, keep feeling the grief, the fear, the dread, the loneliness, whatever it is. Stay alert, stay present - present with your whole Being, with every cell of you body. As you do so, you are bringing a light into this darkness. This is the flame of your consciousness." </strong>

WOW! I have at least "wow" moment on these boards everday!

Thanks Pep, ark, JL, 2long, and many more that are helping make this journey! Your insight, wisdom and humor (immorality!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> ) keep me sane! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

#1142812 06/04/04 11:47 AM
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Fraggles:

"Your insight, wisdom and humor (immorality!! ) keep me sane!"

Sometime, since this is a Marriage Builders website, the subject of "Marital Arts" should be discussed. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

-ol' 2long

#1142813 06/05/04 12:05 AM
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OK OK!, I'll go back and fix it. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

JL

#1142814 06/05/04 12:43 AM
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HEE HEE, well JL - due to the new editing restrictions you're out of luck! It's in print FOR LIFE!

Here's looking forward to a weekend of immorality with my family! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

#1142815 06/04/04 01:11 PM
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Hope4,

Nope, I am no longer "immoral" I AM... "immortal". <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />
Restrictions were lifted I think. Have a good weekend, and leave the "immoral" stuff to me,OK? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

God Bless,

JL

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