<small>[ July 28, 2004, 05:50 PM: Message edited by: Broken Vessell ]</small>

Dear Kas,

Since you call yourself a Broken Vessel, I want to share the following beautiful story with you: <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

THE CRACKED POT

Long, long ago…

There was a water bearer with a cracked pot and a perfect pot…

The cracked pot leaked and could thus only deliver only half a pot of water each trip…

It was ashamed of its imperfections and after two years, it tried to apologize to the water bearer…

Cracked pot: “Master, I’m ashamed of my weakness!”

Water bearer: “Why?”

Cracked pot: “All these years, I’m only able to deliver half a load of water… Because of my flaws, you have to do all of this work and it’s not worth the effort!”

Water bearer: “As we return to the Master’s house, I want you to notice the side of the path…

Did you notice that there were flowers only on your side of the path, but not on the other pot’s side? That’s because I have always known about you flaws and took advantage of it.

I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day, you have watered them. For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate my Master’s table.

Without you being just the way you are, he would not have this beauty to grace this house.”

Each of us have our own unique flaws, we all are cracked pots.

Don’t be afraid of your flaws. Acknowledge them. And you too can be the cause of beauty. Know that in our weakness we find our strength.

Have a blessed day, <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />
Suzet

NS: I have send you a reply on the other thread.

<small>[ June 10, 2004, 04:59 AM: Message edited by: Suzet ]</small>

Being an obessive complusive sort, I understand what you are saying.
I just think you are on the right path and a path which you have been strong enough to recognise and set your feet upon.
Good luck and thanks for the inspiration

Kas,

I have a major problem with shopping. I LOVE ebay, but now since I found this site I haven't been on ebay nearly as much. I use to drink wine a lot in the evenings and finally realised that I was really self medicating with it. I don't do that any more. I think Lexapro (and my restored relationship with Christ) are really starting to help me.

I'm very new here too and I'm glad you are here.

Suzet - That story was absolutely beautiful, like all the uplifting stuf you keep posting.

W.

<small>[ July 28, 2004, 05:51 PM: Message edited by: Broken Vessell ]</small>

BV

You may want to try an AA meeting...

The meetings are all God (higher power) based and very in tune to what your goals are.

Give it a try... I think you will be surprised at the support and acceptance you feel in the room.

Pep

suzet, that was beautiful. thanks.

I'm the BS and I escape too - reading fiction and overeating. What a refreshing post where we admit it!

I agree the solution for me is to run to God, not run away from my problems.

WH confessed about a year ago that his workaholicness is his way of escaping, but if anything that's worse now than it was. (IMO, he's a cake eater.)

<small>[ July 28, 2004, 05:51 PM: Message edited by: Broken Vessell ]</small>

oops, double post

<small>[ June 11, 2004, 08:03 PM: Message edited by: Recovering H ]</small>

BV:

I too know of the props to escape our current situation. While in some ways I was just trading one for another. One of the things that led to the situation where Onlywords was vulnerable to an A was my workaholism (sp?). Since dday, there have been times where I no longer wanted to work and just buried myself in the tv instead of facing the problem and dealing with it.

There were times where I couldn't stop dwelling on it. One thing that helped me is to pick up a book and start reading. One that I am currently reading is "A Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren. It suggests that you read one chapter per day over 40 days and helps you to discover your 5 purposes in life. I think it is very good, though I'm not putting as much effort into it as I should.

<small>[ July 28, 2004, 05:52 PM: Message edited by: Broken Vessell ]</small>

broken...I've always kinda thought that I was the only one who participated in the "escapisms" that I delved in and then I find you. Don't feel alone, you have a friend in Georgia who knows exactly what that is like. I became a shopaholic which I'm sure that men think that all women are anyway, but I was not before. I started drinking daily, I was on AD's, as well as hydrodone which is a strong prescription narcotic. All of this was to just "numb" myself out so that I didn't have to feel anything.

I too was a very devoted Christian, was a virgin when I married my h almost 24 years ago. I had been faithful until this A that went on for 1 year. I absolutely detested myself and thank God that I'm alive today to finally be at a point where I feel like it's ok again to be me!! I am making progress. The very fact that I didn't act on some of the suicidal thoughts that I used to have is reason to be thankful and I know that God had His hand on me even when I thought that he was far away from me.

I agree with bgentle...this is a refreshing thread about admitting how we deal with things. It's like an al anon thread somewhat. A subject that all could contribute to.

broken..I would like to add one more bit of advice that has helped me tremendously in this area. You see, I made the mistake of using God as an "Escapism" too. God has finally brought me to the place where I understand that He never left my side!! What a revelation. What He is asking from me in order to make me whole is to allow Him to show me my insecurities and my weaknesses for what they are. He is there and ready to heal those scars but I have to open up and take the brave stance of allowing him to show me these areas and give them to Him!

It all sounds so simple but it's been a very hard point for me to get to. I can't do anything to change what has happened but I can learn from it and allow Him to use it to bring me to the place that I need to be.

<small>[ July 29, 2004, 02:49 PM: Message edited by: Broken Vessell ]</small>

I never drank before. Yet like you and others who have posted to me, I am starting to use this as a PROP to numb out..

Pepperband was right in her post to me on this site. It scared me to see someone actually saying AA to me, so I guess that is why I never posted back to her. I wanted to 'avoid' the issue and not admit what could happen to me as a result.


Did I hear you calling me??? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Gooooooooo

toooooooooo

AA
AA
AA

aa meeting

Youuuuuuuu
WILL be AAMazed

at how HEALTHY you actually AAre! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

I am not an AAlcoholic! My beloved husband of 23 years is.

AA restored his sanity!!!!

You get me? HIS SANITY !!!!

He is one happy man nowadays.

AAnd he has become AAn AAmazing man.

YOU will go and you will find your sanity.

WHAT have you got to lose????

I promise .... you will like yourself more and more if you goooooooo toooooooo AA!

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Pep

<small>[ June 12, 2004, 02:12 PM: Message edited by: Pepperband ]</small>

<small>[ July 29, 2004, 02:50 PM: Message edited by: Broken Vessell ]</small>

I can't go. Even though it may be anonymous, people WOULD find out here (small village situation).

Sooooooooo what?

They would "find out" WHAT? That you seek enlightenment?

You have NO idea what kind of people go to meetings.

CEOs , teachers, cops, nurses (LOTS of nurses), teenagers, actors (LOTS of actors LOL ... guess where I live?), writers, computer geeks.... every walk of life... all seeking serinity.

You don't want "people" to know you seek serenity???????

YOUUUUUU are silly girl!

Pep

I know why I am doing it though. It is because I am trying to ESCAPE the reality of accepting that I gave in to OM and worse still, though I broke off contact I still care and am in fog and withdrawal.

You are drinking because you have not fully surrendered your life and your heart to God's healing.

AA is a path to that goal.

Step one...

Admit you are POWERLESS........

hmmmmmmm

Pep