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#1178620 08/28/04 11:55 AM
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It has been almost 7mths since my husband told me he has never loved me than left. He doesn't want to work it out. He has his own house, his own life, new friends. He wants nothing to do with me. All he says he didn't leave me for the ow he never loved me and was just unhappy.I came to MB to late to do any plans.I don't know what to do.He has not filed for divorce or anything.He said when he decides to get married to someone else then he will file.HE has bought two new trucks,motorcycle cbr 600,laptop,dirt bike, lift kit and wheels and tires for trucks and lives life a sigle man. He supports me well though.I get to stay at home with my kids, have our house, a new car no bills. He said I am a great mom and he is happy that I am their mother so he enjoys paying me to stay at home.I just want more. I want a relationship with someone. I am so lonely. I love my kids but when you have a 4yr old and 2yr old 24/7 with no adult contact you start to lose your mind.Is there any hope for this. Am I waiting patiently for nothing.HOw long do you wait? He is a new person. He said who he has been the last 10yrs was not really him. He just did what everyone else wanted him to do. HE is going to live life for himself from now on. I am young and want a chance at a new relationship with someone if he is not coming back.

#1178621 08/29/04 12:58 AM
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2kidsmom -

I'm not familiar with your whole situation, as I don't come by these forums very often. A few things that struck me:

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">He said who he has been the last 10yrs was not really him. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">So, 26 minus 10 equals 16. Yep. That's about right. He's acting like a 16 year-old.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> HE is going to live life for himself from now on. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Leaving two beautiful children and a pregnant wife behind. I'd like to revise my previous statement. He's acting like a 12 year-old.

What is your support system like? Do you have family nearby to help you? You need someone who knows you well to help you figure out what to do. If your H flat out refuses traditional remedies like counselling, and he gives you absolutely no hope that he's going to grow up anytime soon, I wouldn't wait for him to have a miraculous transformation. It sounds like he's so in love with himself right now that he can't bear to share that with anyone else.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">He has not filed for divorce or anything. He said when he decides to get married to someone else then he will file. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">What a noble guy. Barring a complete reversal on his part, I don't see the sense in hanging around waiting for this to happen. If you come to the point where you realize that reconciliation is impossible, perhaps you should do the filing. Maybe that will snap him out of his pre-pubescent mentality.

Hope you can find some help and a little peace.

#1178622 08/28/04 01:09 PM
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I don't have much of a support system. ILS agree with me but they said he is there son. I am not pregnant his ow is. It is her H baby due October 21st. She left him Feb 23.We were all friends. I have a 17yr sister who helps me out but other than that it is just my inls. They want me to wait on him. I would if I knew there was a chance but he won't go to mc won't talk about problems just says it is over here is some money. He started his own business 2yrs ago. We struggled money wise until then. Now he does very well.He has no savings he just spends it.

#1178623 08/28/04 01:39 PM
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hi 2kidsmom.....geez my WH is 48 and I think he borrowed your H's script. Guess they never grow up.

My WH apparently wasnt happy for over 18 yrs with me, go figure.

My inlaws feel the same, they agree with me, but he is there son, blah, blah.

Yeah, my WH said he put up with it for the last 18 yrs. Now he wants to live his own new life.

Sorry, i dont have any advice , just want to let you know, i know what your going through.

How did you make it through 7 months, im only into 1 month and its hell.

The only thing i can say, is what my plan is. I am going to look after myself, plan b dark, and hope for the best. Nothing more i can do.

Take Care, 2kidsmom
A/C0810

#1178624 08/28/04 02:03 PM
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a/c

I have no idea how I made it through the last 7mths. I am just getting to the point where i want to know where my life is headed. I want a family. I never had a real family growing up. I raised my two brothers and sister.I want a husband, a father for my kids, someone to go to the park with or a baseball game, someone to go to church with on Sundays.I can't really date anyone because I am married but how am I going to find a husband if I can't date. My only option is DV but that would mean giving up on hope and God.

#1178625 08/28/04 03:39 PM
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I think I am going to call him and let him know where I stand. I feel I am ready to move on. I am just scared.I still want him back but I don't want to wait. I want more!


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