Ok Jelly, here’s an update…

I asked my W Saturday where our relationship was going. She told me that we were probably going to end up D.

???

She said “Well that seems to be the path we’re on, don’t you think?”

I told her I thought we had three choices. To work towards reconciliation, to move toward D, or to keep the status quo. I told her I couldn’t keep going with the status quo. She said “Well I’m definitely not working towards reconciliation with you right now!!

On Saturday night, without talking to my W about her Friday night activities first, I told her that even if our M was perfect, even if we were getting along great and having sex all the time, I was tired of her drinking and “done.” She called me a hypocrite and referenced some things I had done. (These, of course, did not rise to the same level, in my eyes! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> ) This led to a discussion about D. We kinda agreed to start the process but then I asked her “Is this what you want?”

W – “Well if you’re asking me for an answer tonight, then yes.”

M – “And if I’m not?”

W – “Well, then it’s only been two weeks since I’ve moved out so I don’t know…”

That’s how we left it.

After the conversation I realized that we may have a communication problem. We both identified behavior we didn’t like in the other and didn’t give any benefit of doubt. I decided that it wasn’t “enough” to file for D.

On Sunday night W came over to get S. I helped her carry some stuff to her car and then I blurted out:

“I owe you an apology for what I said to you last night.”

!!!

W - “What do you mean?”

I went on to explain that I automatically assumed the worst of her and that wasn’t fair. I just took her drunk sister’s word and never really had a conversation about anything that troubled me. This seemed to really throw her for a loop as she asked me “What does that mean?” a few more times. I think her guard was up that I was trying to backside slam her or trap her somehow. I simply explained that it wasn't fair to automatically think the worst of her.

So, nothing big to update on after all. We’ve talked several times since, but no R talk.

I remain confused.
<img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

Mornin Y'all!

Man - miss a few days, and there's no way you can go back and read it quickly - you skip one line, and it throws off the next 14 posts!!!! I promise you all I'll get back and catch up, but for now...

RH - I think the "Rebuilding" is awesome - it's like everything else, maintenance is the key - and improving is the goal...it's a never ending circle!! Good choice, buddy!

KY - no, e-mail is not down...do I have mail?

NG - didn't find THE post, but get the jist that something good happened - Hooray!!

{{{DipiT}}} You will get through this, and you're right, you are going to love and be loved! (((DipiT)))

{{{Robby}}} Sorry you've gotten to this point with W - prayers for the right decision to be made.

To the rest of Idiotville, I love you all, and don't mean to leave anyone out...will have to catch up later - have a good day I-ville ...
OK, well, <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> for Idiotville, Hugs, too! {{{Iville}}}

Good morning all- it has been a while since I pulled out of the shadows and posted here. I get such a kick out of just lurking. Can someone please help me out with what ROTFLMAO is?

Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, because I am the badest *****that ever walked through this valley, because I am a United States Marine! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

<small>[ November 23, 2004, 10:25 AM: Message edited by: Justuss ]</small>

Good Morning KMEJ!!

Rolling
on
the
Floor
Laughing
my
***
off! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

<small>[ November 23, 2004, 10:26 AM: Message edited by: Justuss ]</small>

Rolling on the floor laughing my *** off - welcome to Idiotville - Robby is the mayor.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> Ok Jelly, here’s an update…
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">No pressure, we could have waited. It's your business, we don't need to know. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> Now that I feel like a jerk. You know it is only 10% nosy, and 90% curiosity. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Sounds to me like you got no where. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

Maybe you need to stop pointing the finger at each other.

The best way to change a persons behavior, is to change yours.

Robby, I will just say, ST loves the no panties and a skirt!!!

Starz, I want to come to your concert. Can I shout and cheer for you??? When is it. It sounds awesome. So jealous you can sing, and I can't. But I can eat chocolate, can you. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" /> (that is a talent, right?) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

The impossible is done with the Lord's help and a few good men. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Marines to our enemy, If you run you will only die tired. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />

Robby, that was awful, (funny) you Marines are all the same.

Yes, YL, I sent at least 3, but I think I was sending them to your old address, so I tried the new one I thought. Must be not.

KMEJ, hello, Robby is the Mayor, but I have the power to shut this show down!!!!!!!!!

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by kyellow4:
<strong> Sounds to me like you got no where. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Confused]" src="images/icons/confused.gif" />

Maybe you need to stop pointing the finger at each other.

The best way to change a persons behavior, is to change yours.

</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">You're right, I got nowhere. But I'm no worse off.

I'm trying to change all sorts of things, maybe too much! It's hard work, especially when everyone, including SIL, is asking why I bother. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />

** edited to take out an extra [quote] **

<small>[ November 23, 2004, 09:32 AM: Message edited by: robby13 ]</small>

sometimes the smallest steps make the most progress. You are doing fine. Your personalitly is awesome. Hang in there Robby.

A Marine’s Rules to Date His Daughter:

Rule One: If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up

Rule Two: You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three: I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose his compromise:
You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four: I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five: It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early.”

Rule Six: I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven: As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight: The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine: Do not lie to me. On issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with Me.

Rule Ten: Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

((((giggle))))

I won't tell you what I called marines who tried to date me when I was single, then.

Course I had a name for the guys in the Army, too. Unfortunately (or fortunately, depending on how you look at it), I didn't heed my own advice not to date military anymore.

#1 reminds me. D'ya know what my dad would do when dates would come pick my sister or I up? Yep. Clean his guns or sharpen his knives. Once, my sister was 1/2 hr. late, and he sat in a lawn chair with a pellet rifle in his lap IN THE DRIVEWAY. Okay. He SAYS he was shooting at the grackles.....but we all know the truth. I don't think the guy even slowed down much dropping her off.....lmao!

{doing backflips for de}
Dang! How do you ladies get away with no panties doin' flips and splits and all? OK--left that wide open for some crude jokes to come out.

{adjusting man marbles}

Hiya Idiots!!!!!!

Bob...good to hear from ya--I had signed off already though. (Gotta talk to FM about the crab cakes--I'm told (lived on an Island my entire life and really dislike seafood--go figure--I'm a walking contradiction) down in the Inner Harbour they are the best in the world.)
When are you gonna be in The States?

De...baby steps hon. Just give him credit he took one huge step. (Just disregard the fact that he didn't ask, "Mother may I?" <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> )

KY...gotta teach brown how to play...we don't have time...only went three times this year, but shot my best in a long while--88.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">But I'm actually OK ! Strange how bravery tends to pay off in this 'recovering from an affair' stuff innit?</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">"I'm a big brave dog. I'm a big brave dog."

Robby, can I be optimistic with you? I'm seeing it the other way--a little light. You opened up to her. Is she gonna come in for some tea and scones, don't know. But you left the door open. Keep talking.
"I'm a big brave dog. I'm a big brave dog."

Well, Idiots, off to finish Tday shopping!

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> including SIL, is asking why I bother. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Robby, I hope you didn't think my comments asked this same thing. I wasn't implying that.

Sorry.

On that note, I'm out of here.

Have a great Holiday everybody, much love, Jelly

ROTFLMAO--did I get it right? Way too funny you two. The worse thing my dad did was sit in the dark and flip the lamp on as I was trying to sneak back up stairs. Luckily my brother backed my alibi- which was totally a lie.

When I had a guy over on the front porch my dad would light this "date candle" we had until it melted down to the holder to be with this person, then we had to say good night and come inside. Oh the good ol days <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

K- I could just see your dad at the store looking at the candles with the shortest burn times...weighing them in his hands ('member the candles that were really light and would *snap* just burn up quick?). LMAO!

You did it right (rotflmao). What I refrained from telling is my dad would do this in his KAFTAN. Yep! A man dress....my mom made it for him. She made dwh one, too. He's saving it for when our daughters date.

More strange news from NZ-

WELLINGTON (Reuters) - A pod of dolphins circled protectively round a group of New Zealand swimmers to fend off an attack by a great white shark, media reported on Tuesday.
Lifesavers Rob Howes, his 15-year-old daughter Niccy, Karina Cooper and Helen Slade were swimming 300 feet off Ocean Beach near Whangarei on New Zealand's North Island when the dolphins herded them -- apparently to protect them from a shark.
"They started to herd us up, they pushed all four of us together by doing tight circles around us," Howes told the New Zealand Press Association (NZPA).
Howes tried to drift away from the group, but two of the bigger dolphins herded him back just as he spotted a nine-foot great white shark swimming toward the group.
"I just recoiled. It was only about 2 m away from me, the water was crystal clear and it was as clear as the nose on my face," Howes said, referring to a distance of 6 feet.
"They had corralled us up to protect us," he said.
The lifesavers spent the next 40 minutes surrounded by the dolphins before they could safely swim back to shore. The incident happened on October 30, but the lifesavers kept the story to themselves until now.
Environment group Orca Research said dolphins attacked sharks to protect themselves and their young, so their actions in protecting the lifesavers was understandable.
"They could have sensed the danger to the swimmers and taken action to protect them," Orca's Ingrid Visser told NZPA.

Geez, I read that in the paper this morning and wondered to myself if you'd seen it!!!!!! LMAO

We are NOT weird. Well, maybe a little bit.

Jen