Okay I am very new at this.I'm not sure of codes or anything so I'm just going to write it out.My husband is in the army stationed in Afghanistan.I recently found out he has been calling this girl he met over the internet.He says he don't love me he just cares for me then he says we can try to work it out.Right now he is making plans to see her when he comes home on leave.We have a two year old daughter and I still love him very much,I want to stay together but I'm not too sure what he is thinking.He says he has tryed to stop talking her twice but always ends up calling her again.How can I make him see that he's too far away to make these changes in our life.Next month we will be married seven years.I have considered letting him go to this women and just hope things are not going to work.He comes home in May so I have four months to change his mind and see things can be good for us.I am desperate for him to give us one more try.He says he's given me too many chances.I'm willing to change for him I just need him to see that.I can't go to his command on this,he told me he will divorce me if I do.Feel free to reply here or to email me.Thank you for listening.
|

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by daisey_marie2002:
<strong>I can't go to his command on this,he told me he will divorce me if I do.Feel free to reply here or to email me.Thank you for listening.
| </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Welcome to MB. Read as much as you can about MB concepts if you have not.

It is not totally lost and there is still hope.

Read this Exposure. It is normal for WS to do this, unless you have a specific reason, you should expose it. He would eventually Dv'ed you anyway if you don't.

-rh-

Hi Daisy,

Welcome to MB.

As suggested by RH, please acquaint yourself with the concepts section and get ahold of the book Surviving an Affair by Dr. W. Harley.

Read it and post back. Keep a journal of your sitch and get with a good MC. You can also call Steve H @ MB who is a marriage counselor/coach. He will help you get a plan.

As for your H divorcing you if you go to his command.....he is babbling to you and now you need to know the difference.

Here's a thought.....if you are up to this, let him know that investigations on his alleged OWs are under way....no details, just mention it.

He will press for details, don't give him any. Just let him wonder what you may have found out. As he wonders, he will spill details and you can begin your investigation with his info. Then you can do a background check on the OW. The internet meetings with OWs are ruthless. There are many women out there without scruples and want your name and title along with all the other benefits, esp the monetary ones.

So it is important you know the id of the OW.

REport it to his command when you get info together. For now you gotta sit tight on your emotions. Read the material and post here. It will help.

You are not alone. Several military wives are in a similar sitch. You will find support here.

take care,
L.