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New situation, stuck here too: I'm in the middle of drafting a Plan B letter, and W calls this morning - just bought a set of beds for her house, wants the kids to come spend the night - 'camp out' Very conflicted: says no way OM will be there, is not having 'that kind' of contact (although I think he wa there yesterday). She has decorated her house so that it feels very 'homey' - ours is as empty as an old shell - she took just about everything she could (mostly her stuff anyway - I never bought knick-knacks or pictures for the walls) - all that's left on the walls are my paintings.
I have this sense of impending doom: she's set this thing up so that they will feel comfortable and hav lots of fun there, while dad is having them do chores and fighting to keep food on the table. And she still hasn't given me any address as to where she lives.
And I'm stuck on plan B: I'll just repost here what I jacked into Caren's thread: "So I'm in the middle of writing my Plan B letter and watching all that Caren went thru. I have no idea what my WW will do/is capable of doing. All I know is that she wants a D. Almost feels like a hopeless enterprise, with lots of nasty side effects and pain to the kids and I.
With barely any love left for her - I just feel neutral - it's been hard to express a desire to work on our marriage, it's been hard to express any kind of love. I am stuck"
My wife is very intelligent and very capable of coming up with something that I cannot forsee. At least I have the custody papers drawn up - just waiting for the 22nd (next paycheck) so I can file - haven't done it yet - keep hoping for a change, and dreading the enormous battle that I face once this happens. She wants the D, but she also wants custody of the two youngest (I think)...
David, lost as usual
<small>[ February 17, 2005, 01:40 PM: Message edited by: tanelornpete ]</small>
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Not much to advise here, David, just to let you know you are not alone. My life has spiraled out of control and I amlost myself! What sad people we are, huh?! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> Frustrating cause I know I do not deserve this and I am so angry that I am here nonetheless!
I have asked WH to move out and am trying to come up w/ some sort of Plan B myself. It is time HE pursues ME for a change!
Guess I just wanted you to know you are not alone. I don't often reply, but I have followed your story and I know the pain you are feeling, trust me!
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David, I would not let the children go without knowing her address and phone number. {{David}}
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"><strong>Guess I just wanted you to know you are not alone. I don't often reply, but I have followed your story and I know the pain you are feeling, trust me! </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Thanks! That means an awful lot!
David
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<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> No problem!
And I totally agree w/ FF... I would never allow my kids to go someplace w/o an address and phone number! You are a parent and your #1 obligation is to those kids! But you already knew that.
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I have the phone # - we share a cell phone plan. But not knowing the address is really getting to me. Makes no sense why she won't let me know it. Think's I'm some kind of sick stalker or something. I have no interest in finding out what she does in her house at night. I have better things to do, like, watch 'Who's Line is it, Anyway'.....The things she thinks about me anymore make me almost physically sick. She has accused me of things to her friends that are unbelievable. How the fog can create such hatred makes no sense. And at the same time, at times she calls and appologizes for what she did to me.....if I appear confused, it's because I am. I do NOT want the kids involved in Plan B in any way - that is between she and I. But somehow I fear things I can't imagine. I don't know WW at all.
David
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***But not knowing the address is really getting to me. Makes no sense why she won't let me know it. Think's I'm some kind of sick stalker or something.***
C'mon David -- this one couldn't be more obvious. OM is either living there or staying on a regular basis and she doesn't want you to know this.
***I have no interest in finding out what she does in her house at night.***
If your kids are going over there, you had better have *every* interest in knowing what she does in her house when the kids are around.
No way should you let the kids go to her house when you don't even know where it is. Of course she is hiding something, and you can be sure that what she is hiding is the OM.
Mulan
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David,
My WW did the same thing. Bought a bunch of new furniture and told me how excited she was. This excitement will pass. It has been 3 months since she moved out and I can tell she is depressed. I am just going to keep Plan A'ng and take care of myself and kids.
Want to chat tonight?
Keith
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by BHINWI:
<strong>
Want to chat tonight?
Keith </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Love to chat tonight - missed you last night - but I work tonight - be gone all night.......
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> <strong> ***I have no interest in finding out what she does in her house at night.*** If your kids are going over there, you had better have *every* interest in knowing what she does in her house when the kids are around.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Mulan - that's entirely different - she isn't taking them anywhere unless I get the address. I was just talking about not caring what she was doing on her own. Supposedly OM isn't around this WE...... <strong> </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">No way should you let the kids go to her house when you don't even know where it is. Of course she is hiding something, and you can be sure that what she is hiding is the OM. Mulan </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I'll have the address tonight, and probably be handing her a PBL at the same time. David
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