Ok I posted earlier asking about Plan B. The responses I received, made me reconsider my Plan A. Did I actually try plan A at all? Its only been a week. I gave up before I really started because I did not think Plan A would be effective while living apart (H is 2 hours away)

Ever since H moved out, he has been getting his taste of freedom. I found out that he even has a new "friend" he has been spending time with. Not only has it upset me, it has also upset our D11. His first weekend with both kids he already filled their heads with "I will always have a love for your mother, but I'm very hurt for what she did. I'll never get married again, but I might get a girlfriend, but that won't happen for a long time from now" He really had no business telling them anything like that especially in this time of confusion for both of them. So when she heared from her grandfather that daddy isn't here he is out with a friend she is very suspicious and gets hurt. She confronted him later about it and he kept changing the subject. She insisted for him to tell her who he was with..he didn't respond at all. She asked him if it was Dave, he told her "Yes thats who I was with"

Why does he do this? Why does he continue hiding what he is doing? Guilt perhaps? Well it makes me think he is still confused and that there is still a possibility to save this marriage. But it has to be done in baby steps and I have to make changes in myself as well. But how to make deposits to his lovebank when we live apart? Or try to meet his EN when he doesn't give me the opportunity? To him, because of my past behavior he can't trust what I say. Everything is a way to manipulate him to make him do what I want him to do.

How can I start a good plan A. To make him see that I am making an effort to change. I am sincere in rebuilding my marriage. I suggested we see a MC..he refused so went on my own. She suggested that for my sessions we work on me. So far I have had 3 sessions It has helped me see things a little more clear. Also coming to this board reading and posting religiously has helped some too.

So please help..I'm still thinking with my heart and can not see from the outside looking in on what I may be doing wrong.