I don't know how much I had mentioned this to anyone recently. The psychotic xow is a stalker I have arrest warrrants out for her in my state, Reason she moved to another state. The stories I could tell you make Glenn Close look sane.

Well I am 5months pregnant now and just got the mail I saw an american baby mag in it and I was so excited because of course i signed up for it over the net at the beginning of my pregnancy....Well I look on the cover and it had OC name on it... another stalking ploy of the psycho demented xow. But she has made me upset most of the time i do not get that way but she is getting me all mixed up with emotions... I did not want her to know about my pregnancy and i told my husband to keep it as quiet as possible so we just in the last 2 weeks started telling his family and friends. Now I know she sent another baby magazine in my Husbands name last month, but I didnt care I thought maybe it was a mistake because my husband is on a lot of mag lists. Well now I know for sure it was the psycho... I am so tired of reporting her to the police and going to court and all that jazz. I am so preoccupied with the pregnancy and not doing well at work and my money/marital problems.

I guess I just wanted to vent but mostly I need advice in my emotional state with the pregnancy The crap is getting to me again, I was numb before and didnt care because if there was one thing i knew for sure my husband hated her and wanted no contact with her or her child.

I still know this but its getting to me again. she had stopped for a few months when my husband took her stuff to court to show her harrasment of our family now she is doing it again in a round about way.

Any advice on how to shut my emotions down when it comes to her psychotic behavior?

Can you guys MOVE? Do you have a restraining order? That's demented. Given all the wacko stories in the news, I'd be really, really careful and do everything you CAN to protect yourself.

Moving away and changing all the info you can is not too much.

I'm sorry and I hope things look better for you soon.
J

She's harassing you in a roundabout way? The OW in our life is doing the same thing. We have a restraining order against her, and she still stalks/harasses us. She's just subtle, that's all.

I found a couple of websites that deal with stuff like this. I hope these help.

http://www.saveyourspirit.org/
http://www.stalkingvictims.com/discuss/phpBB2/


Document everything. Be on guard. Most importantly, don't let her control your life. She's obviously on a power trip, don't let her win.

If you need more help or someone to talk to, let me know and I'll give you my email address. Oh...and Orchid is pretty knowledgeable about how to deal with this. She usually posts on General Questions 2.

Just wanted you to know it also happened to me and I wasn't pregnant! Mine came with ow's first name and our surname! How low can you go?

I still have it and it's documented in a police report we recently made on everything we know ow's done in almost 4 1/2 years!

Sooooo..... document and save everything. Also call the magazine and have that name removed from their mailing list.

Cordelia we even received notices from "baby picture" places sent w/her name my last name. It was upsetting at first but now it's plain foolish the things she's done.

Best wishes on your new coming baby.
Debi

If I could afford to move I would in a minute. I cant sell my house and buy another I really do not owe alot on my home and my mortgage is really reasonable.

Its a big house for a little money. If I bought another house for the same price I paid for this one it would be extremely small and i am on my 4th child.

I really appreciate the offer of email. I may take you up on that.

I do not know how say it but, I am sick of going to the police, with little stuff like this all the time and I mean all the time... thepolice look like damn her again.

We cant extradite her to my state so she is just left to laugh at us. It is sickening the crap she does I swear i am about to go in revenge mode if she doesnt stop. I wanted to just let the police take care of stuff they do nothing.

Cordelia, I also had similar things happen during my pregnancy. I went shopping for maternity clothes and there was a mailing acct. in H's name. The address given was our street address (we don't have a mailbox and recieve all mail at a P.O. Box). It was a fake address actually that had been given when we purchased the house until 911 addressing came to our area. H had this address written in his wallet for some time as we needed it for insurance purposes etc... Anyway, I assume OW opened that acct. in hopes that I would question why H was getting mail from a Maternity Store.

I am also pregnant and can relate to the emotions you're feeling. I just posted about it as well. In the begining I don't think I was too emotional. I was feeling insecure and dependant on H, but now I am feeling extremely emotional. I don't really have advice for you, but I wanted to tell you that I understand what you are going through.

I also didn't want OW to know that I was pregnant. I turned out to be a good thing because I had some complications during my first trimester. I almost miscarried. I think if I would have had the stress I had when OW found out I was pregnant (Dday #2) I would have lost the baby for sure. I was glad OW didn't know until later.

Do you work out? That always helps me to feel better. I also try to talk to friends often. That helps as well. I am really trying hard to focus on the baby and preparing for her rather than wallowing in my own self pity.

I hope you feel better soon and can focus on the positive, which is the little baby you will have soon!

Could you take a 2nd mortgage out and have her "wacked"?

Wait---who said that?!?

K thats funny I only wish she could fall off the face of the earth.

I would settle for her to fall into a coma so I dont have her to bother me.

My friend told me to send her dirty mags addressed to the xow
lol ha ha omg she was killing me with all her made up names.

Wife30 thanks for the words of encouragement and the swelling i have in my feet makes it hard enough to work much less work out I am still in the exhausted mode. I cant even concentrate hardly at work I just hope they take mercy on me and do not fire me.

Well she did it again I got an email this time.

I am going to get back at her its been too many years of this crap she has no life obviously OR nothing better to do, and wants misery to keep her company or something.

I have such bad edema now i may be off work soon.
they are worried about my vision and headaches going to some condition.

I will have nothing but time to get her back, if she does not stop

Hey Cordelia...

I was just thinking about you the other day and noticed that you had added a reply to this thread.

*sigh* So, the OW sent you another e-mail, huh? Was it threatening in nature? Print it out, include all the header information, and then save it. DO NOT RESPOND!!! She wants your attention. By not responding, you'll drive her nuts.

She's doing the same thing that the psycho in my life is doing. She leaves you alone for awhile so that you drop your guard/forget about her. And then she invades your life every so often just to get her jollies. It's her way of feeling in control and forcing you to think about her again. She's remaining a part of your life even though you don't want her to be. Sometimes I just want to tell Psycho (our nickname for the OW) that her attempts at intimidation/control aren't working. What part of "Leave us the heck alone!! don't you understand????? I think I've finally convinced myself that she can't harm me and doesn't deserve the attention that she craves. She's nothing to me. In fact, I'd give more consideration to an ant crawling on the sidewalk.

As far as your health problems are concerned...do you think that they could be cause due to the stress that she's giving you? My health went down the tubes due to myself letting the OW get the better of me. I'm slowly getting better, but it's going to be awhile until I feel good again.

Edited to delete email once Cordelia got it.

I had the site and IP address traced its one that is anonymous remailer using proxy servers ect. So no info there. I called american baby and the subscription was mad in May on the net and no way to know who did it.

I have bad edema and yeah the stress of my life and work is prob contributing to the blurred vision headaches and sometime high blood preassure.

I have ignored for a long time the demented ****. I think it is the pregnancy that is making it bad but it is getting to me again. I feel that since she has not had any consequences for her actions legally or other wise She has not learned not stop .
She was not burned for touching the stove.

She taunts me because they wont extradite her for the harrassment and she basically says- so what I can do what I want I know how to not leave evidence and not get caught. And she is absolutely right... nothing is happening to her legally or otherwise.

I think its emotions that are getting to me because I am pregnant but I want her to pay now, I am sick to tears of her getting away with everything. I really was in a good place before with her being left out in the cold and ignored by me and H. I felt she is pitiful because she has a ******* child that will never have a father in its life. I thought she was just lashing out at me for the time being but will soon realize that it was not me making my husband ignore her and disregard her and her childs existence. It was his choice. I seperated from my H he could have freely spoken with her but did not. Actually he hates her and I think she realized it cause her tone in her mailings have started making bad comments about him as well.

So kind and loving and a good man my husband was before lol
"Now he is a deadbeat, loser, that will physically harm her"
according to her statements to the child support/welfare office.

I will send you an email.

I use to really believe in this quote;

The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.

Maya Angelou

I think that is why action is need by someone, like myself, to stop the psychotic stalker.

Don't you already have a RO on her? IF so can't you use that against her right now?

Well, thankfully, you can just be grateful to the good Lord that your children will have the blessings of being raised by such a wonderful human being as obviously your husband is. He does seem like a terrific person and especially a good husband and father. He is certainly a model for your children to model themselves after.

Cordelia, maybe it is just this "fact" that is making this crazy OW do these things to you. The "*******" as you say, will never have the good fortune to be raised by your DH, and I think she just cannot deal with this, so she is just lashing out at anyone so they can hurt to.

Just my take.

LM

This so called "*******" child as you refer to him/her is your H child and your children's half sibling! Such a nasty word to be used to describe the innocent child. Please refrain from using such obscene language when describing the baby!

Yes I have a RO it is called a personal protection order in my state. I have reported it there is nothing they can do but what has been done issue more warrants. The lawyers all say it really has to be a physical act that would prompt more action. The sad thing is that most anyone can do anything to anyone within limits and there really is nothing that can be done about it. The fine line the stalker has found and stands on it.

Please calm down about the work B*****D I use it to describe my own nieces and so does she. My whole family uses it as a normal everyday part of our conversations, we do not care if people say that anyone in our family is a B*****D if they are. Big Deal Geesh . I am sorry but ALL of my family and friends do not give such power to words.
People if you allow simple words to control you, and infuriate you < you will be easily upset and stressed out all the time.
Sorry but even when people call me racist names I say big Deal oh wow that hurts my feelings NOT. At least i am using a real word not a made up slang one.

I have seen the term used in the church and in legal documents so sorry if you all cannot deal with a word that is used in everyday society. I think you should all look up the word Adulterine B*****d. It was used in my aunts legal papers issued by the court when describing her child.

Lemmonman With your sarcasm aside "Cordelia, maybe it is just this "fact" that is making this crazy OW do these things to you." And I should care in what way?

What exactly did I do to her besides not speak to her or respond to her after I realized she was lying to me?

I tried to handle it like a woman and listen to her ranting and ravings and even provide her with the proof that things were not the way she thought they were in my home.... I did not have to do that... I thought maybe she needed that to realize that it was NOT ME or the the truth is not the way she claims my H described.... ONCE I found out she was a sociopath and I caught her in many lies and I heard recordings of her lying about everything she was telling me... I ceased communication with her. I gave her a chance and she did the stow stuff.
So once she could not get to my H through me anymore and I already knew that he stopped communication with her but of course I did not believe him because I had this person telling me otherwise, stupid on my part. She flipped out, there was not a way to get to her obsession.
So why should I care if she is feeling anything? she fully knew we were married and had children. She intended to break up my family out of her own desperation, I will only give her that much credit, I know it was much more of a grand manipulative plan to see if she could.

SO LM what exactly was your point with your statement? Unlike yourself I am not being sarcatic I would really like to know.

Cordella, with your high risk and all I know you don't need the emails and such. For that I am sorry. I know what it's like to have a high risk pregnancy. It's not fun and full of worry.

As far as the other thing. Okay your family finds it acceptable. MOST don't though. It's a word that is dirty. Even today as mad as I get at xmm for some things that he's done and LIED about I would never even think to call him that not even out of anger, and he was too born out of wedlock and from an affair. Luckily he was adopted by a great set of parents.

I'm sorry that you can't understand why it insults so many people everytime you refer to that. My child is far from that word. Will never be that word. No matter how she came into this world. NOT all ow are the same cordella. and ALL the children bc, oc included are all innocent in these situations and they are ALL gifts from GOD!

I had to comment on the use of the word *******. Personally I don't view it as a nasty word but rather as the truth. Period. Merriam Webster defines a ******* as a 1 : an illegitimate child It may not be pretty but it is infact what the child is. I'm not saying this to be rude or vendictive or hurtful to anyone as technically I'd be considered a ******* child because my parents weren't married when I was born. JMHO

I almost wrote the same thing (definition) yesterday, calismile!

I do feel the OC is an innocent party but personally that doesn't keep me from using that word at times when I am really pissed at the sitch. I never would use that word or express the anger I still have over the whole thing directly at OC - in fact the two times I saw him I had no "bad"feelings toward him whatsoever, he was quite lovable. I know the difference in when it is appropriate to vent and use that term and when it is not as does Cordelia too I'm sure.

I just think Cordelia had every right to use that word in a post to vent! And it wasn't a big deal.

****Cordelia, the very fact that you are as upset as you are and venting like you are tells me the OW still holds a very "strong" power over you. She is still able to push your buttons and is probably laughing her A$$ of at you. She is no doubt a sick woman, but whether want to admit it or not, you are giving this OW an incredible amount of power over you. It seems that you do NOT have any power or control to make her stop doing whatever she is doing to you (and obviously neither odes the law), but you DO have the power to control how YOU react to her BS. Getting back into a pi$$ing contest with her is only likely to escalate things.

As for my sarcasm, ofcourse it was said toungue in cheek. If I recall, your WH was fully ready to fight for custody of a Ba***** child he did not want just to "spite" her....or "show her". While there is probably no doubt to the culpability of this OW being a pscyho woman, there is also little doubt that your WAYWARD husband is 100% responsible for bringing this mess into YOUR Life. There is obviously other sides to the story...your side, her side and the truth...which usually lies somewhere in the middle.

Quite honestly I would much rather continue this discussion with you in the GQ section, because I have ALREADY recievd an email for not being "supportive" enough to you and told that I should leave this section because I am questioning you. This is clearly a "support" forum that does NOT invite question or anything that does not carte blanche offer the BS praise and agreement. There is nothing wroing with that if that is what the section was entailed to be, so if you want to continue the dialog you know where to find me. If not, that is ok, good luck to you and the impending birth of your child.