OW had told xH that now that she knew that we were back together she was going to ask for CS ...
She did ... but not through an attorney ...
I guess she sent the paperwork or request CS to the Child Support Unit ...
She got a letter back saying that given that she lives with her parents (her dad makes good money), she has a 40-hour job, and no other debts, she needs to show them her need for CS ...

Comments?

Hey Mily! I must catch up on the OW saga... how and when did she find out about you and H getting back together? Is there a thread I can read regading you, my friend!!??

How do you know about the CS agency's letter- did H get a copy of it ? It sounds really strange that they would not still require the bio father to pay something...?? He may not have to pay much according to the income guidelines mixed w/her living situation.. but still I find that really strange.

All I know is --- I would not look a gift horse in the mouth if you know what I mean!! Let the courts worry about this- and not you- that is the beauty of this-- it is NOT your job or responsibility to worry about the oc's child support... court... etc. RIGHT? We have enough to worry about. Just relax and enjoy you and yours and let ow and H worry themselves about the stuff you cannot control.

Luv ya girl.... !!!!

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />yes ... the OW saga is right ... a couple of weeks ago she said to xH that she was not stupid and she knew that there was something going on between us ... because taking the vacations together didn't ring a bell on her mind <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />
Apparently he aknowledged our relationship to her ... big words <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> and that's when she told him that she was going to ask for CS ...
which let me to think that I was right telling him ... she is not asking for CS because she still has hopes with you ...

He's been giving her checks (with copy) for certain amount biweekly and she was fine with that until she knew for sure that we were back together.

Then she tried to get him jealous saying that a guy asked her on a date ... and he said good, let me know when it is so I'll take OC. She wasn't happy, you don't care for me, blah, blah ... And he told her that she should have move on a long time ago ...

Anyways, she showed him the letter yesterday ...

but you are absolughtly right ... the beauty of this is that I don't have to contact lawyers for anything or go to court for anything because I'm all set and done with that ... This is just between xH and OW to figure it out ... no sweating ...


===
Now, not to T/J my own post ... how are you? how are you feeling these days? ... I've been meaning to write to you in the other posts ... bad Mily ... I have not done it <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

Hey Mily, thanks for asking about me!

Well... in a nut shell, my H has been staying at his sisters house for almost 3 weeks now. He and I were pretty much both wandering away from the M again...

I am okay one minute and not the next, but seems to me it is mostly OKAY !! I am NOT sure if I want to think of him coming home - he wants to - but I am not sure so he acts like a total jerk when I say I dont want him to come over, etc.. then next day its me wanting him BLA BLA on and on, but I am in PEACE at home and doing lots of POSITIVE things with my son, family, friends.. AND I have been pampering myself and fooling around with new looks for me, losing weight, etc! There ARE good things for me out there MILY!

I am so glad you and your H ARE making progress!! And yeppers-- let the MESS MAKERS clean up their mess and you stand by to receive the hugs, kisses and love from your H , your kids and OC if and when you can!! No worries for you- just MILY time, right! LOL ! Hugs girl!!!

I posted to you in Recovery <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

FYI - I was with OC yesterday! The last time I saw him was on March, then on his Baptism on May but I didn't dare about 'touching' him ... anyways H got him yesterday and we went to lunch together ... we were both amazed how cute and affectionate he was with me ... it was good ... it felt good ...

It sounds to me as though the OW applied for Aid to Dependent Children welfare benefits, as opposed to going to DHS for child support, and her income and low living expenses disqualify her for ADC.

Her income and lack of expenses do not have any bearing on whether she is entitled to child support.

I don't know how it is in other states, but usually the Child Support division of DHS has two ways of getting involved:

1. The mother qualifies for and receives ADC.

2. There is a court order for child support, which means that if she wants CS, she will have to get an attorney and go to court for it.

Maybe y'all need to see an attorney about getting joint custody and visitation set up.

I'm glad your H is doing the right thing. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

LC

Thanks for the info. I think that's what happened ...
She says she does not have money for an attorney (neither does xH) ...

Mily if you educate yourself and read read read your laws of the county etc., you guys can do this yourself!

If you have come up with an aggrement with her, I'd have your husband at least file it with the courts so he/you don't have to worry in the future (or at least 3 years) about anything. Good luck!

Mily & Giovanni,

So how's everything going? I have missed you girls soooo much!!!! I am in the latter stages of my divorce, but H and I have been getting along pretty great actually. H has been around the house as if he lives there constantly begging me to come back. I am still confused believe it or not. I know that I can not live with this OC presence as it is now. I have NC and my H claims that he does but I just don't believe it.

I can't seem to move past it and it is tearing me up inside. we have a wonderful family time and have taken vacations and trips with our kids, but it never seems to be enough. Sometimes I think I just want to move on. Will this Divorce wake him up???? Does it really matter???
Will I forever be haunted by OW/OC especially since they are present here in the same city and close to his job?????

What do I do now and I still can't seem to not question him about them and what he really plans to do??? Then he just explodes, but gives no real explanation. I should not even care, but I do???

Well I must go I guess I'll catch up on the two of you later.


Mily, I am glad things sound like they're looking up in your family's direction. I wish the best for you and will talk to you soon.

Gio, I am not sure if I am understanding you. Are you and your H not working out????? What has happened????? Why did you drift apart???? Sorry if this is painful just wondering if I can save myself some pain.

Love Ya,

JT <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />