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Maybe so NY, I just don't know.

I really do believe he has seen an attorney though. I really do believe he is going to file for a D. I am not saying it will go all the way but I do believe he will do it.If nothing else but to freak me out and let OW know he is trying.

I know he knows everything he says gets back to me. And I know he knows how I will react without them even having to tell him.

I will also agree that OW is pulling strings and pushing him. I have no doubt in my mind she is pushing him to file.
She is about as stupid as him if they think divorcing me will get rid of me permante. No matter what happens we will always be connected due to chilren and grandchildren...

why he would need a loan I have no clue. He did tell DD he was looking to get a house so he could get 2 of our dogs. I am going to have to speak to my attorney about that. It would not be fair to seperate the dogs fro meach other. And the two he wants are the two that don't like strangers. So OW is in for a rude awakening when she gets bite lol

Anyhow I am staying dark an not responding or reacting in any way.....


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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Document date and time of sexual disclosure to daughter. Your attorney can use it to leverage extra support for therapy for your daughter and for you during LS period...

You can always allow his mental cruelty to have the maximum consequences FOR HIM!


Cafe Plan B link http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2182650&page=1

The ? that made recovery possible: "Which lovebuster do I do the most that hurts the worst"?

The statement that signaled my personal recovery and the turning point in our marriage recovery: "I don't need to be married that badly!"

If you're interested in saving your relationship, you'll work on it when it's convenient. If you're committed, you'll accept no excuses.
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[color:"red"]
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Hurting: This is getting even better.

WH told DD that him and OW are not having sex. He said he told me that they were to just piss me off..... So sounds to me like he is trying to make out like he is not commiting adultry. He is going to try and just say they are living together no sex involved..... I don't believe a word of it.....

He is on his way to a lawyer right now.

Has he lost his mind or what...... You can't tell me that he has been with this woman all this time and no sex... I know my WH.......

What will he do next????
[/color]

Orchid: Can't believe he told your DD this. Make sure that info gets in the D and LS docs. Let it serve as proof of his A.

BTW, you don't need his BVD's to prove he is having sex with the OW. The judge does not have to smell the A. The stench is already in the air and the OW barf is all over the WS. The judge and the rest of the court will get a whiff of it when he walks in.


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Kayla: Document date and time of sexual disclosure to daughter. Your attorney can use it to leverage extra support for therapy for your daughter and for you during LS period...

You can always allow his mental cruelty to have the maximum consequences FOR HIM!
[/color]

Orchid: I agree with Kayla. Inform your lawyer the stuff he is unloading on your children. Better to prove him an unfit father but one who still needs to pay child support. In fact, ask for it t/b garnished.

JMHO,
L.

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I just got home from work and my mind is still reeling with all that was said today.

I was talking to a male co-worker tonight and telling him what WH said. He laughed and said yeah right..... I don't believe that one minute. He said no man is going to leave his wife and move in with another woman and not have sex.

I wish I could understand why he wants to hurt me so bad. Is he trying to get me to hate him? Because he keeps this up and it won't take much longer for that to happen....

I have written down everything from beginning to now with dates and all .... I will be giving this summary to my attorney to see if it will be of any help..... I have even inclued the times we had SF. I wrote all of it down.... I am sure WH has no idea I kept such good records....


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: May 2005
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Hi Hurting.

I don't post much any more (I'm in lurker mode) but I wanted you to know that I completely understand amd support what you are doing.

I'm filing against my WH on Monday (Halloween!). I've had enough.

I know you've only filed for LS, but you are doing the right thing for yourself and your family, and staying strong.

Take care.

Alph.


Me, BS 37 Him, WXH (Noddy) 40 DD13, DD6 Married 14th August 1993 D/Day 2nd April 05 Noddy left us 3rd April 05, lives with OW (Omelette) 28 Divorce final 6th July '06. Time wounds all heels... - Groucho Marx ...except when it doesn't. - Graycloud
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Alph,

thank you for the support. I am trying to do whats right for us.

It seems WH has other plans though, He wants to make me misreable.

I do believe though it will all backfire on him. I pray it does anyway..

I am sorry you have to go through with the filing . I told WH from the beginning when he started on D talk. I would not be the one to file he would have to do it, because I am only interested in saving our marriage not D. After filing LS though I guess he has now decided its time.

He put it off until he see's I am not taking his crumbs anymore. Guess in his mind a good way to pay me back. How dare I stand up for myself !!!!!!! What a jerk he is being ...


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
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Not to make light of a tragic situation, but I can' stop giggling to myself at the vision of hurting's H standing before an Oklahoma judge stating:

"I DID NOT HAVE SEXSHUL RELATIONS WITH THAT WOMAN!!"

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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mel,

I have to agree with you .. Everyone i have told this to starts laughing right off....

No one can believe he will try this. I also believe he is trying to find a place to live so he can ay he is not living with her. Well the problem with that is I have proof that he was ... bank statement with her address on it, he will be served at that address plus the fact DS stayed one weekend out there. Everyone knows he lives there. And he better not think for one minute I won't pull people in to prove it.

He has really gone over the deep end if he thinks anyone will believe his lies...... I am wondering if he has been served yet? I hope so because DS called and said WH was going to the bowling alley to watch him bowl this morning. I sure would hate for him to be gone when they show up with the papers....


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: Dec 2004
Posts: 61
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Hi Hurtinginokla,
I don't have any advise for you, but I have been following your posts, and I just want to let you know that I am thinking of you and wish only the best for you, whatever that may be. Sounds like it will be a tough day for you with the serving of WH's papers, hang in there.
All my love,
reewil. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />


Me 39 WH 40 Married 21 years 2 daughters 18 & 21 Affair began Sept 2003 Affair ended Aug 2004 (found out about affair continuing 3 times in this period). In recovery, doing well (most of the time).
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Thank you reewil.

So far nothing has happened. But I am getting ready to leave the house, I just don't want to be here in case.

Mabe he will say or do nothing which is even better....

Just f rom the remarks he made yesterday to DD and MIL , I feel he is trying to come up with a gameplan to make himself look good. So he may just stay quiet to not rock the boat anymore.....

Hard to say ....


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
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Thanks for your comments on my thread .... I wanted to add this to your thread ... USE HUMOR every day to maintain your equilibrium during this stressful time.

Schedule sillyness for yourself.

It keeps your perspective balanced against all this drama.

OK?

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

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Hi Hurtinginokla,
I don't blame you for not wanting to be home when he is served the papers. Just remember that this is not your fault.
It seems to me that nothing WH does would make him look good. He needs to be your H again to do that. Here's hoping!!!
Even though I am still with my former WH, even now, I can't believe that he had an affair. I just believe that he was a totally different person when he did it. I hope that your WH comes out of his fog eventually.
All my love and thoughts,
reewil. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />


Me 39 WH 40 Married 21 years 2 daughters 18 & 21 Affair began Sept 2003 Affair ended Aug 2004 (found out about affair continuing 3 times in this period). In recovery, doing well (most of the time).
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Hi all,

I just would like to say that I thank god every day for this place, it is what has kept me sane over the last 2 years. I haven't posted much, but just to look at everyone elses posts has been a tremendous help. A heartfelt thank you to you all and may you be blessed with everything you wish for.
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
reewil


Me 39 WH 40 Married 21 years 2 daughters 18 & 21 Affair began Sept 2003 Affair ended Aug 2004 (found out about affair continuing 3 times in this period). In recovery, doing well (most of the time).
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You all are not going to believe what happen.


Iwent to see my friend and while i was gone WH came to the house to get some tires from the yard.

I had locked my bedroom just in case he came in. Well that didn't stop him. He sent Ds throught the window to unlock the room.

WH proceeded to take some more of his personal stuff from the house. His collectable cars and a few jackects and stuff.
I had in the bedroom some collectable figures made of peacan shells and some old avon bottles. He took those as well. he seems to think they belong to him and him alone. Some of them have some value. DD said he told her to ask me if I wanted the record albums we have, if not he would take them. I am appaled that he had my son crawl through a window and go into my room like he did.

The room has a deadbolt on it and so he locked it from the inside and had DS crawl back out the window...

He just called DD and told her to tell me to get the car title out he has a buyer for it.... He said I better be quick about it..... I can't get hold of my attorney on the weekend .. what can I do ?????

Now he want to sell the car from me....

I don't know if he has been served yet. He may not have been home to ge the papers....


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: Jun 2005
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Hurting!!!! OMG. Isn't that breaking & entering ---- even if it is "his" house. He has moved out. I don't know for sure, but I think that he could be prosecuted??????? Especially if he has been served. He can't sell the car either if he's been served, right??

I am apalled that he had DS crawl through the window.

Your WH never ceases to amaze me.

Kim


D-Day May 14th, 2005
Married 16 Years
DS age 8
6 months Plan A
Plan B 10-11-05, H moved back in June 2007, Very False Recovery.
2nd Day-Day 7/7/08 Kicked WH Out.
Plan B for my sanity
"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things." Robert Brault
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Thays just it Kim I don't know if he has been served yet or not.

I called the police they said the best they can do is if he comes over is to call them and they will make him leave.

They said the temporary injunction is a civil matter and they can't do much. So if he comes and takes the car they can't do anything. But he will be in contemp of court and the judge will make him pay.

Wh is he doing this stuff? Has he not done enough to hurt me. Now he wants to take the only transportaion I have .... he is really getting nasty.... I don't understand why...


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,200
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He is. The car is considered marital property in my state, is it in yours??? It was acquired during the M. He will have to pay if he takes it & sells it.

I just can't believe this. I am so sorry Hurting. Is there anyway AT ALL that you can reach your Lawyer??? Surely he left you an emergency number???

Kim


D-Day May 14th, 2005
Married 16 Years
DS age 8
6 months Plan A
Plan B 10-11-05, H moved back in June 2007, Very False Recovery.
2nd Day-Day 7/7/08 Kicked WH Out.
Plan B for my sanity
"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things." Robert Brault
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yes the car is amrital property and according to the temp injunction he can;t sell anything....

The car is in his name due to the loan but he agreed to give it to me.... He has said nothing about wanting it until now... He is so mad he is trying everything to hurt me now.....

I have no contact number for my lawyer..... I just don't know what to do. He can't drive it off but he could sure disable it for me.... I have the only set of keys to it...

He does have keys to unlock it but thats it..... If he takes this car i am so screwed ......


BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,200
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Hurting -

Can you park it somewhere else?? A friends? Do you have someone who could help you with that????

He is thinking of anything & everything. He has gone over the limit here.

Is there anything else that you can think of that he might try to take from you that is of value??? (besides breaking your heart which he has already done a good job of.)

Kim


D-Day May 14th, 2005
Married 16 Years
DS age 8
6 months Plan A
Plan B 10-11-05, H moved back in June 2007, Very False Recovery.
2nd Day-Day 7/7/08 Kicked WH Out.
Plan B for my sanity
"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things." Robert Brault
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I would immediately move the car, and park it somewhere else. Also you could put a club on it to keep it from being driven.

He is just looking to get back at you. Protect yourself.

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