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Will she ever come back? Or, why do I want her back?
It has been over a year since she moved out because of her 3rd EA and then went right to a PA with someone else. She is dating a guy and they have broke up a couple of times but then get back together.
I don't contact her much but emailed her on our 1 year anniversary of seperation that I still cared about her (I know that was stupid of me). She came back with more excuses of why we could not get back together and all from the "Fog Bible".
She is such a different person. She is out all the time, partying, new friends, etc.
I don't know what to say... A year later and I am still so depressed about this.
Keith
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Joined: Jul 2004
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Keith, can I ask you why you want her back? If she had 4 A's during your M then she seems to have some serious character defect.
Faith
me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
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Keith, old man, I'm afraid this message isn't going to be very palatable from your point of view. To put it succinctly, what you need to do is get on with getting on. No, she’s not coming back and even if she did, she’s not what you need. It’s time to put her memory aside and make a start on the rest of your life.
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Everyone,
I know, I know... I just miss her.
There is someone out there for me when I am ready. I just need to get over not having her and my children.
Thanks,
Keith
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Keith,
""Or, why do I want her back?""
I think you have answered your own question by saying.
""She is such a different person."" Why would you want a different person back.
Not the lady you married, but the alien that you divorced.
Your byline says you are divorced. So what ever you do or say to her is NOT stupid. Maybe wasted energy though.
I am curious as to where the children ended up. Hopefully with you!!
Listen to Longhorn...may be time to look ahead and not so much behind. Move on down the road.
k
CORDUROY PILLOWS ARE MAKING HEADLINES!!
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""get over not having her and my children.""
She is out all the time, partying, and she has the children too?? You don't have them 50% of the time?? That's not good!!
k
CORDUROY PILLOWS ARE MAKING HEADLINES!!
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Dear Keith,
I am so sorry you are still stuck with the feelings of pain, and longing for her.
Maybe it is time to get into counseling, heal yourself so that you have something to offer the next time you find a wonderful girl to fall in love with.
Best wishes in your recovery from your divorce.
From the sounds of it, your xww was not a very nice person, and from her history would not make a very loyal or stable wife.
In the end, I have nothing to lose but everything to gain, by trying to save my marriage.
Me, betrayed wife 46
Former Wandering Husband, 51 E/A 2005
28 years of marriage
DD 26, DS 24
O/W aka, Rat 29, A-D Assisted Living
Discovery 8-20-05 Recovery ongoing.
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I should clarify, I have the kids 50% of the time but 50% is killing me. I need them all the time... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />
She has left the kids alone while she goes out. When I find out, I go get the kids and document it.
She was a sweet wife but I can't understand her EA's. I am still in therapy after 16 months because I am so devasted. But, I am moving on. I have just hit a lonely, low spot I guess.
Keith
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Joined: Aug 2005
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BHINWI, I'm soo sory to hear of your torment. I also feel the same way, as far as lonliness the emptiness. meanwhile our WW go out having a ball, when It's all I can do to put on a fake smile. I like what Krusht said: That Is exactly It for me. My wife was gone when she started her A, she was replaced by an alien, and that Alien will posses her forever. I have met the alien and It's not something I would ever choose to have a relationship with EVER. As far as the kids, you should go for custody. It sounds like she Is not performing her "motherly" duties. Keep the faith and be strong <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Me BS 44
WW 38
Together 11
Maried 9
EA 7/9/05 PA 7/23/05
9yr old son + 14 Step S + 21 Step D
DV Day to come
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