Hello, my wife and I have been married for 14 years with 2 kids. Over the past few years our marriage hasn't been to great. We have been seeking marriage counseling and our counselor is great!
It seems though, we have all gone around and around on the same issues. Wife harbors alot of resentment for things that have happened over the years. I understand I'm partly to blame for her feeling that way, but the counselor has said it has to be up to her to learn to let go of some of that.
I'm really into wanting to fix the marriage better, but unfortaunalty I do not think my wife is. Sometimes she acts as if she does, and other days I'm not so sure. Its like she doesn't put her heart into the whole trying process, like shes just going along with the flow.
I have talked to the counselor about it and he told me that it sounded as if I was the one that has tried many things in the marriage, where as she hasn't tried so hard. I asked him since most all things have been tried what are my options now?
He tells me, that when both people want to work on the marriage it can work. However, if neither or only one wants too but the other doesn't then theres not alot I can do. He said at this point you have 2 choices. Either accept the fact things are the way they are and live like that. Or you get out of the marriage. We have been in counseling for almost 4 years now. Nothing on her part seems to be getting resolved, so I think thats why he says the ball is now in my court as far as what I should do from here. *Sigh* tough situation. Thanks for letting me vent.
Joe
