I've read this string with interest and some alarm. Last year when I went to my gynologist after my husbands affair she did run some tests, I'm not sure which ones and I didn't get any results back other than the pap. She gave me a lab slip to get an HIV test if I wanted to but said she wouldn't realy worry about it because the woman my H had the affair with was not a prostitute so the chances were slim that there was a problem. I never went to lab and stopped insisting on condums after the dr. visit. I complained about problems in our sex life and she gave me a sample of Zoloft saying it was for pre-minapause problems. When I showed the sample to my daughter she said it is an antidepressant. Dr. Harley said to change drs. Iv'e been to this one for 15 years but will see a new one this year. I didn't even think about making my husband get tested. Of course we haven't had sex in 4 months now. The stress got too great in a very slow recovery. When I refused sex my husband threatened that he would go to a prostitute this time because an affair was too hard but that he would have sex. That realy made me want to do it. This thread makes me resolve to make him go for testing before we resume sex, if our realtionship makes it.

It also makes me conserned for my vergin daughters. I wish the law required testing before marriage.

Hi rb123,
I understand, this has all been very alarming to me too, and stressful, to say the least. I'm very concerned that your H would threaten to go to a prostitute. First thing...you must have felt terrible when he said that. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> Second, he needs to realize the high risk he would put himself in for contracting a disease, and then bringing it home to you. That can come with any... prostitute or not...really.

Most people that have many partners or even a few don't get tested, so he doesn't know what he is getting if he has sex with other women period. Many people never get tested for HIV and can carry it for a few yrs without seeing symptoms, that is frightening to me. They just don't think of it, or think that the other persons are to high class, not persay prostitues, and they think they are clean...they could never have it. Many people with HIV or other STD's could tell you the same thing, they thought it could never happen to them, they were not that type. My H said the same thing, says he can't believe he has VD. I watched a video in the clinic last time we were there. There was a young man, he had sex with an older woman. He come from a good family, he didn't know he had HIV/Aids until he developed what he thought was a cold, and then it turned to pneomonia, it was then that he found out. I didn't watch the rest of it, because I then had to see the workers. But to me it was the reality, and my H GW are the reality. My H didn't watch the video, he sat and read his book. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> I guess he knows it all. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />


Anyhow....You could find out exactly what tests were given by contacting your Gyn. I hope you will reconsider and get all tests done. I would highly recommend your H does too, but if he refuses, it is still important that you do. If anything it will give you peace of mind if everything comes back neg.

Yes, I do to. But even though the law doesn't require it, it is the wise thing to do anyway.

Lady

Stu,

Are you still around? I have a medical question for you if you are. H and I are truly recovered and doing great (3 years post d-day). We did have sex right after D-day, but the STD factor seemed pretty irrelevant at the time because he'd been having sex with other women and me at the same time off and on for years. No prostitutes (not the kind that get paid anyway...lol!).

I developed several strains of genital warts over the years during stressful times. I was told (by my old GYN) that I could carry those for years in my body without symptoms and then suddenly have an outbreak so I was not as suspicious as I should have been.

After D-day, three years ago, I developed yet another strain about 6 months into recovery. It was the worst one yet and I was SO upset! I quickly learned that visible warts were NOT the ones that caused cervical cancer and that was a relief. Because of a compromised immune system (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome for 12 years), I really struggled to beat the virus. My GYN's approach was to beef up my immune system with vitamin and mineral supplements. It took two years for them to go away. I'm not even sure that they are completely gone now, but she didn't mention them at my last exam and said things "looked good."

About a year ago I had a pap test that was not abnormal, but still reported something about cellular changes that suggested I'd been fighting "something". I don't recall what the changes were called. It was still considered normal, but for some reason that my GYN could not figure out (God's grace...lol!), the lab had gone ahead and run the HPV test! I was so thankful because my insurance would not allow me to request this test!

The results were that I had NO high risk HPV types. Now my question...finally! Does that mean that I don't harbor those types or that I didn't show signs of them in that moment in time when the swab was done? Could I still end up with a positive test at another time (assuming my H stays faithful and he is my only partner)?

I've wondered about this. I asked my GYN, but didn't feel I got a clear answer and it could be because medical science doesn't know that answer right now. I know that they used to believe that the HPV virus remained dormant in the body forever, but my GYN (she's at the top of her field...just excellent) said that it is now believed that some people DO beat the virus completely. It seems that for everything we KNOW about HPV, there are three more things we don't.

Anyway...if you have any answers for me I'd appreciate hearing from you! I meant to get a clearer answer from her, but you know how those office visits go so darned fast...at least from the patient's perspective!

Thank you!

Stillwed

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You can go to www.thehpvtest.com which provides some good information on test results. The basis answer to your question is if the HPV test is normal, but the PAP test might be questionable, then both the PAP and HPV test should be repeated in a year. If the PAP and HPV both were normal, then the HPV test would not need to be repeated for 3 years. I think the conclustion that can be reached is that the test can only measure active cells and there is the possibilty of the virus being dormant.

I'm not a doctor, but I enjoy reading and researching medical information.

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Does that mean that I don't harbor those types or that I didn't show signs of them in that moment in time when the swab was done? Could I still end up with a positive test at another time (assuming my H stays faithful and he is my only partner)?

Sorry this took so long, I've been trying to keep myself busy to calm my own anxieties...
Anyways, your question is a good one. When they run these DNA tests for the viral strains they can only look for DNA from cells that were actually collected from the specimen. Of course the specimen gives a very good representation of the cells from the transition zone on your cervix, perhaps ~95-98% but it is not 100%. It is after all a "screening". The low risk types means that they are not as aggressive and less chance, cause less changes/damages to your cells, therefore less risk of dysplasia.
The answer to your question of whether you could harbor the high risk type and not show up is that: it is possible but a relatively low likelihood.

Stu,

Thanks so much! That really does give me a sense of relief! I appreciate your time.

If there is anything I can do to help with your anxiety, let me know. I don't have any medical experience...just a therapist who keeps trying to get me to go to school to become one...lol! My main way of helping others right now is to help them understand their Enneagram personality types and to do personal work around that. I'm a type One, the Perfectionist, so you can imagine how this HPV thing nagged at me! I've really had to learn to mellow out!

Take care and again...thanks!

Stillwed

Stillwed,
You're welcome. Answering some questions on here makes me feel helpful to the board that has helped me... Just giving back.
Quick question for you since you're good with personalities...
based on my sitch listed here could you deduce what she might be thinking or doing?

I'm waiting for her to open up a file I sent her to spy on her computer to see if she is in fact having another relationship... Eventhough all the signs point to it, I need proof.

I had a lump appear on me last Monday, on the inside of my upper thigh near my genitals. I was freaking!
I couln't tell if it was a GW or a pimple. I did an experiment. I began using my sons baby wipes ( pampers with aloe unscented) and taking Echinecea (2 a day). And I drank 2 cups of pau d' arco tea a day. It is going away and almost gone, so I think it was a pimple or cyst maybe because pus came out (sorry for the graphics). But I don't think pus comes out of a GW. Thats all I have had so far.

Lady

Hi again Stu,

For fear of threadjacking LadySheep's STD thread, I'm going to create a new one just for this converstation. I'll title it "Stu...". The very best thing we can do is to figure out your personality type first. We might also be able to figure out hers, but it is harder to type someone else for sure! It's harder to type when someone is very unhealthy too.

See you on the other thread. I'm usually over in "In Recovery". This place is so much busier than that one!!

Stillwed

Dear LadySheep,

I'm glad that turned out to just be a pimple or something like that. About 6 months after d-day, much of my stress started showing in my physical body. I had an "outbreak" that honestly looked like herpes. I even had pain spreading down into my thighs from my buttocks. However, it all went away, never to return so far.

I was so worried that I insisted that my H be tested for Herpes. There is a newer and accurate blood antibody test for herpes now, but it is not usually run when you go in and ask to be tested for STDs. My H's test was completely negative. Since I've only been with him for the past 30 years, I made the assumption that I don't have it either. That is possibly not a wise assumption, but I've had no symptoms since that suggest otherwise.

Hope yours is just stress related too!

Stillwed

Hi stillwed,

Yeah, I think it is stress related because I did breakout with pimples (bigger than usual) on my face too.

Stillwed, I'm wondering if the things I used would work for you when you have an outbreak. These all have lots of vitamins and minerals.

1. Echinacea - immune builder (herb)
2 Pau D' Arco - virus killer (herb)
3. Baby wipes (pampers aloe vera unscented)

My H is using all his prescribes topical meds, creams, and soaps. But I don't think they are going to work.

Lady

Dear Ladysheep,

Thanks for sharing your alternative remedies with me. I have vulvar pain syndrome and have to be very careful what I use. My GYN doesn't even want me shampooing in the shower for fear of adding insult to injury with shampoo residue! It's a pain in more than one way!! I have to be very careful about soaps and such.

I can't take Echinacea because of the CFS. For some reason most CFSers can't take that particular herb. I will look into the other one though!! Thank you!

Your H might need to beef up his immune system so that his body can fight the virus. These viruses generally burn themselves out fairly quickly in a healthy immune system, but it can take a year!! That is what is considered fairly quickly...and that is without treatment. Stress can really do a number on your immunity. I wish I could remember the entire list my GYN gave me of supplements to be sure and include a day. I know a few:

200 mcg Selenium (no more)
1000 mg Vitamin C
100 mg B6
Natural Vitamin E...I remember her wanting me to take more than I could. I was bruising easily from too much of it because I was taking it along with fish oil I think. I believe she said 800 IU.

These lesions are going to take awhile to go away. What cream did they give him to use? It's a very slow process from what I understand.

Stillwed

LS,
a good way to tell a GW from a cyst or pimple is that GW is always flesh colored, and nontender. most of the time it will be a bit rough on top. A cyst or pimple usually will have a stage where it is tender and slightly or insensely red, but always smooth on top.

SW, a natural supplement called "Wellness Formula" is one I've recommended to ppl. Taste bitter but very good immune booster. I've had people take 3 tabs every 3hrs in the beginning of their cold or flu sx and have the sx go away in 1-2 days. I've personally heard several doctors recommended to their pts that's why I've recommended to my pts. I've only seen it at Mother's market.

Hey everyone - my tests for Reiter's syndrome came back negative. Thanks Lemonman! (for saying not to worry too much about getting everything I read about). I was really SHOCKED - I had it in my head that I had it for sure, and would pass it on to any future partners.

I am so happy for you Believer. That is an answer to prayer and a huge relief I am sure.

This thread should be tagged and placed on top of the General Question secton.

A huge relief is an understatement. I had read all of the stuff on line about the disease - you get arthritis, conjuntivitis, urethritis, cervicitis - LOTS of itis's. But the WORSE thing is that a small percentage of folks get pericarditis - that one affects your heart.