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When dining out with a woman, should I place the order for both of us or let her order for herself. I don't mean deciding what she wants to eat. Obviuosly, she does that, but after, when the snooty waiter comes bye, should I give him both our orders or only mine and let her give her own order?
Usually, I let her go first and then I tell the waiter what I want, but I often wonder if I should just do both along with ordering the cocktails, wine, and after dinner goodies.
Just another guy exploring middle age.
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hmmmmm i dunno...i've never had a man order for me...sounds like a nice idea though...i'd be impressed...lets see what everyone else thinks... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Me, 43 DS18, DD12 Divorce final May 10, 2007
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I think you have to play each situation by ear. Depending on your discussion during the menu-selection, and the type of woman, and your relationship, etc.
There have been times when my date has asked me what I wanted, and I told him, and I thought "oh, how nice! he's going to order for me!"... then when the waiter came, I paused for a moment, and my date looked at me like go ahead, so I ordered myself. I would feel special if my date ordered for me, but it's not a big deal, and not an expectation.
I think it would be ok to ask her "can I order for you?", if you are unsure, and if there's room in the conversation.... you know.... "so what are you having" "Oh, I think I'll have the shrimp and pasta" "oh that sounds good.... I think I'll have the filet mignon".... "that sounds good too... would you mind if I order for the both of us?" or just DO IT. Surely you'll read her well enough to know if she would freak out or not. .... meaning.... like if I changed my mind, I would politely speak up. I could see some women freak out and say "oh no! I don't want that!!! I want this..." or even worse "I can speak for myself" kindof thing... surely you would know who you're dating and if they would react like that?
Anyway, I would be flattered and would love for you to order for me. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> But not offended if you DON'T. I am capable of doing it myself.
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Joined: Aug 2004
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I'm in agreement with the others, I think it'd be really nice if he did it, but not a bad thing if he didn't.
personal recovery
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Personally, for me, I think it would be a little much. BUT, I have never thought about it so maybe I would like it.
On another note.... While I haven't experienced much of this dating, I'm always nervous about how much $$ the meal costs and try to be considerate of that when I order.
Which brings me to my next thought/question..... I did have a date last night. We went bowling and then to get a bite. I do enjoy a glass of wine [or 2] with my dinner, but I have found out thru a friend this gentleman does not drink. This did not come up in conversation, but I find it awkward. Has anyone experienced anything like that?
The date went smoothly, the date was over fairly early sometime after 10. I had my mind set that I would not invite him in afterwards, just because. However, during the date, conversation was easy, and I didn't feel he was liking me anymore than me him, so I did invite him in. At a point during the time he was here, he asked me if he could move closer to me? And I told him, I would rather he didn't. I think he was a little shocked, but no more than me!
I didn't want any touching or help, kissing. This stuff is not easy! Huh, wonder if I will hear from him again??
Sorry for the highjack, thought I would share. Karona
Divorced 12/17/2003
Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
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I prefer he orders, but some women (I don't understand why) take it kind of insulting...
So, if you don't know how she might react, why wouldn't you simple ask her? A la: "Would you like me to order?... I'm fine either way..."
I'm not Belonging to Nowhere anymore! :-)
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At a point during the time he was here, he asked me if he could move closer to me? And I told him, I would rather he didn't. I think he was a little shocked, but no more than me! I cannot imagine any man who would not try at least 'move closer to me', even after a few dates if you invite him in... Especially 1st date... Be careful... Re: drinking... although I don't drink during the supper, not even a glass of wine, I'd find awkward too if he does not... My 'suspicious nature' (after M with the man he loved drinking, way too much) would wonder if he's hiding something... Anyway, I'd like 'my gay' have a few drinks... (from time to time... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />)
I'm not Belonging to Nowhere anymore! :-)
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My BF always orders for me, always has, and I love it!! And he did so on our first dinner date. I had my one other post-m date order for me, and loved it then, too. It's old fashioned, and us older girls like that.'
ps Also, when walking on a sidewalk, my BF is ALWAYS between me and the traffic.
cm
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BF usually ask what I want to eat and then orders for me when the waiter comes to take our order.
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<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
More "details" I pay attention... moreover they contribute A LOT to my 'first impressions' about someone <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/ooo.gif" alt="" />
e.g. entering a restaurant/bar/any public place I don't like at all when a gay let me go first, thinking it's gentlman's "lady first". Well, it is not. He goes in first, but keep the door open for her; she goes first on the way out. Picky, I know <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
I'm not Belonging to Nowhere anymore! :-)
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BF usually ask what I want to eat and then orders for me when the waiter comes to take our order. It remainded me... My X and a (female) friend of his and I went to a restaurant (it was her birthday and my X wanted to treat her...) So, we talked about what to take, then waiter came, and my X ordered... for the two of them only... forgot my existence... poor senile gay <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
I'm not Belonging to Nowhere anymore! :-)
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