OK, this post was inspired by the "Final Straw" post. I would like to share the most ridiculous lies that your WS told you....

Here are some that I heard...

- "I am taking douche to work to tidy up."
- "I bought new bras and panties because of my weight loss."
- "I am emailing him to see if you are spying on me."

Aren't these inspirations called "Spin Offs"? Like "Laverne & Shirley" was to "Happy Days"?! FUN!!

Ok, here's one of the ones I'll share.

My X was ALWAYS late coming home. (If he came home at all!) Anyway, he always, of course, had a good reason!

He was almost run off the road by this big semi on the freeway, and it shook him up SOOO bad, he had to pullover, to calm down, and he fell asleep!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

OK, now this has got to be one of the best ones I have ever heard!! Like we all fall asleep after we are shook up!!

I need to hear more excuses... Maybe I will give an award to the best!!!

"I didn't hear the phone because I was raking leaves" 7:30 pm middle of December on temperature was near freezing. I asked him how he saw the leaves and his reply, "Street light." And then he said for some reason the phone didn't work after that but the next morning it was fine. My reply, well the phone healed itself.

When a friend of mine saw him and ow in Atlanta Hotel (before I knew of affair & friend didn't have the heart to tell me). When he got back from trip, he had no idea if I was told by my friend and told me this story that he forgot where he parked his car, this hotel employee was helping him find his car and held his hand because of the big crowd in the hotel lobby...

And before we were married he told me..he had his Bachelors, Masters degree and only had to write his thesis to get his Doctorate, played baseball for the major university he attended, his age, that his first major in college was pre-med and he changed his major because he had never made a "B" thus fearing he would in pre-med, and he was a Christian so he was saving himself for marriage....that load of crock was nothing but lies. No degree, no baseball, old, poor student and saved himself for his first of many prostitutes.

He's a gem...

Depends on the OW he was seeing at the time - he had many lies/excuses for his stupidity...so I'll save space here and only list a couple

I was never going to leave you and #@#*@ was never going to leave $#$)$%...Well, to me since that A was going on for ??? he DID leave me, yes, he lived w/me and pretended to be a H but emotionally he was GONE..

She's having marital problems and so are we..I guess so if you are both checking into the same room, DUH

She has ISSUES..Though, he wouldn't elaborate..yeah, and you befriended her to "bed" her.

This is all "Your" fault...No, this is the type of man you are and I just didn't see it..Tell the truth - you cheated on wife # 4 just like you did on #1,#2,#3

And the lie of all lies "I love you"...the ridiculous part of that is I believed him.... :
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

WH is very believable. It's sometimes a few hours or days later when I shake my head and think "that doesn't make sense." The last year he's become a compulsive lier. The worst lies are the little silly ones. Does he really think I'm that stupid? My favorite is he has to get off the phone but he tells me "I'll call you later." LOL

Biggest Lie: He pretended to work on marriage for about 7 months so that I would keep quiet to the Christian school where he works and he could get a state championship football ring.

WH still claims he is not seeing OW despite the fact I have two letters he was going to mail to her. One of the letters talks about him going over her house.

My WH's biggest lie is that he and OW are not living together. I caught them in bed at his house 2 years ago. He STILL insists that they are not living together.

OW moved out and left her daughter and husband 3 years ago. When I constantly saw OW's car parked next to WH's at his place, WH insisted that OW is living in her car, and just parks overnight at his house.

Sigh there were so many lies I cannot remember them all, but this is my all-time favourite:

WH has moved out. Cannot spend the weekend with me because he is going home to visit his sick mother. She lives in another state. Two days later, WH comes back from mom's house and has dinner with me.

His mom calls.
He proudly tells his mom he is having dinner with me, and we are working on our marriage.

I miss his mom (I love the woman). I ask to speak to her.
After a few words, I asked if WH took her out to dinner, spent some quality time with her.

MIL was puzzled, said that WH hasn't come home for a long time.

WH squirmed and turns red under his tan.
Grabs the phone from me and hung up on his mom.

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

He later tells me that he wanted some time to be alone, and was in his own apartment all the time. He didn't go anywhere or do anything for two days... uh, bla bla bla, bla bla blah.

For me, the gems are finding out about his lies. They miraculously unfold before me... I never have the need to confront him about his lies... somehow he is always there when I find out. WH is always too stunned/ embarrased/ have no answer when I find out. I think God is behind all of this <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

I'm sure there were many.....

But the one that sticks out in my mind was his camping trip. [with the boy scouts no less! We have two girls]
He did not want to come home from work before he went. He was leaving from work for the weekend, camping. [keep in mind, this was February, and he was tent camping, up North]

I noticed two things that day, that if he were going camping, he should have sure had these two items.
His two way radio's and hiking boots.

I never saw him or talked to him until he came back after the weekend. [which he came home about 4 hours later than he said, his truck broke down??]
I can't remember what he had on for pants, but he had dress shoes on.
He wore his dress shoes all weekend camping! And what do you know, they were clean!!!
Not to mention, camping in Feb, and there was NO smell of fire on his clothing.

Who was the fool???
He moved out the following week.

Karona

Do you know how to catch someone in a lie? Ask them detailed questions and document what they tell you. Then ask them the exact same questions a couple of days later. They will not be able to remember the lies. Apparently the police do this for interrogations.

I caught my x changing stories all the time.

By the way... she is now on her 3rd boyfriend since she left 16 months ago. She also quit her position as a Sunday School teacher and quit our church.

What is this woman looking for???

Sounds like one confused woman to me, in search of??? I don't think she knows. She seems to be troubled and lost.
It's sad what they make of their lives. All because they "thought" things would be so much better.

Karona,
they are in search of something that they dont even know how to find. They will continue, for the most part, to bounce from relationship to relationship in an attempt to fill the void they feel in their lives. Never quite understanding why the void exists. One day they will wake up and wonder...."how did I ever get too mean to pray?"
WS's are to be pitied.

You know Texas, I never thought I would see the day when I felt pity for my x for ALL the hurt and destruction he caused, but I do, at times.

I don't know if he will stray again or not, and today, I really don't care as much as I used to. The only thing I want at this point is for our girls to have a good relationship with him and good experiences when they visit him. I can tell you, that is not always the case when they return. His wife has angry outbursts often, so much so that recently when he picked them up, he told the girls not to say or do anything that would set her off.

WOW, what a life!! The worst part, our daughters are in the middle of this happy life they have created.

Karona

Karona,
as BS's we do go through many emotions....anger and pity being just two of them. And anger is okay as long as it is healthy anger..i.e. ....not letting it take over us.
As far as your girls....yep that is tough....but the reality is that they have a wonderful mother that sounds like she is very much attuned to their needs. That wonderful mother is more than capable of counterbalancing the madness that comes from their father's life. I am guessing that someday they will come to pity their father as well, and following the fine example set forth by their mother!

WOW! Thanks Texas, that was very kind.
I do try to do best for my girls and for the most part I think I do a pretty decent job. There are times though, when I feel weak in this whole process. In the end though, it's all good!

Thanks again,
Karona

Okay, I don't know to this day if these were the truth or lies.

"I have no clue how that red smudge got on my white briefs. Maybe it was my flannel shirt."

"I put the cushion back on the sofa properly after sleeping on it. I know how it annoys you when I leave it catty-corner."

"If you got up at 5:30, you must have just missed me. I told you I was leaving early."

"There's nothing wrong."

The last one I didn't believe. All the rest, I was forced to believe because to this day I can't find any evidence that he didn't adjust that pillow for the first and only time that night. Because I have no evidence.

But, you know what? It doesn't really matter now. And that's the best.

Your welcome Karona. Sometimes its easy to fall into the traps that keep us from healing. I just wanted to remind you of what is true and what is ultimately most important. I dont have kids and sometimes I wish I did, but glad they didnt have to go through a divorce. I do the best I can with my two dogs and my cat. I look at them and my family and know that I might be single but I am definitely not alone. And neither are you!

Reminders are a good thing.

We are all in good company!!

Thanks again Texas!

Karona

Texas -

You are absolutely CORRECT...I don't even think my WH realizes there is a void and that void is within himself and noone can fill it. That's why I think in his case he has many OW - they each "give" him something. But since he continues to delete and add new OW to his "pasture" why can't he figure out he has the problem not us. He has to fix himself before he can become a "healthy partner" w/someone else..
Gez, what am I today stupid...what a dumb statement...He doesn't care if he's a "partner" to someone else - he doesn't need to give of himself to have a healthy relationship - because he's a taker not a giver..DUH...he will continue his pattern of turning anyone that loved him into a "Royal [email]B@@@@"...[/email]

HUGS

Most ridiculous lie:

"I hid in a locked closet when I talked to OM because I care about you and didn't want to hurt your feelings"!