Met a very nice woman on eharmony. We started corresponding and we just found out we have lots of the same interests and values in life. We have been emailing and calling each other for about 2 months. We spent the day together last Sunday and both really enjoyed it.

She has told me that what she really likes about me is that I do not pressure her... she has told me that most of the guys she has met on eharmony want to get in the sack almost immediately.

We live about 2 hours apart... I asked her last night if she would like to get together for dinner again. She suggested I come up on a weekend so we can spend more time together and stay overnight (in the guest room). She said she trusts me completely and is totally comfortable having me as an overnight guest. (That means a lot to me as it does mean she knows me.)

I can feel this person is starting to take my heart little by little. It scares me because 18 months ago, my heart was pulverized by my X.

Not sure why I even posted this... Just thought I needed to write it down.

BHI...; go for it! You will find those who tell you that it may be too early, or if you're not sure don't do it...etc, etc, etc. While they may be right, you will never know unless you do. Oftentimes we don't know where we are going until we get there. I spent more than a year before I even considered a relationship. I explored several relationships in the past 2 years before I found the lady I am with right now. There are no guarantees in life; you live your life responsibly and do the best you can. New relationships are just that......new......don't try to find something you have lost in a new relationship. Expect and accept change if you desire a new partner. Anyway, it sounds as though you have been cautious and that is about all you can do; see what develops.

ecxpa,

Thanks... I will go to see her - I want to. I just don't want my heartbroken.

I have gone out with several people in the last few months and not "clicked" with any of them. All nice women, and they all wanted to go out again. But I could just tell, the chemistry was not there.

But, this person is different. She very intelligent which I find so attractive in woman... it actually drives me nuts! She is also so pretty. She did not post her pic on eharmony so I did not even know what she looked like until the relationship started developing... I am glad because then i would have thought I was just after her physical beauty and not who she really is.

I will be patient, friends first, and see how it plays out.

Keith

BHI...no demands, no expectations has become my motto...just let things flow. Good luck

QUOTE - "I just don't want my heartbroken."

It is scary - thinking that we could possibly go thru the heartache and drama of another R ending because of cheating.If you end a R because you just don't have certain things in common it's different than the deceipt/heartache of cheating.

There are days when I think my heart has turned to stone - that I built a wall so high to keep WH from hurting me anymore that I won't be able to ever let anyone in. I'll be able to date, but to give my all to a R again - it's not something I foresee. I still see my WH as the "once in a lifetime love".

I'd say go too - have a nice time and find out all you can before you step into deep waters...

HUGS

Hey Keith,

Good for you! I'm really happy for you. Just take it slowly and make sure its what you want and you'll do fine.

Your heart breaking or potentially breaking someone else's goes with the territory. IMO if you aren't prepared to handle either of those two scenarios you aren't ready to date. But you may be just being a bit cautious?

On another note... I've also just started seeing someone who seems really great. Very intelligent and ambitious, and very good values... Very refreshing! She's sure helping restore my faith in the female race!

Take care and its great to hear from you!

Mike

Mike,

Oh yea, I know I am being cautious... I don't want to get hurt like my X did to me ever again. But, I want to live again. I can sit home in fear of being hurt or get back on the saddle. I think I will get on the saddle.

Good for you finding someone! Best of luck....

Keith

Good for you BH!

My only advice is to go slow, and be pleasantly surprised at how great it can potentially be for both of you.

Best of Luck to you.

Karona