|
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243 |
Just found out my H is talking to another girl...having thought of suicide. Just dont know what to do anymore.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243 |
cant stay in a marriage of lies and i dont think i could handle this by myself i dont see any options.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777
Member
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777 |
Lost - who is considering suicide?
foundareason D: March 2006 (xw - multiple a's)
I have found a NEW REASON!!!! A Treasure!!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243 |
me...i just cant take this anymore i prayed for help and i am so alone
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243 |
i am not strong enough to go thru a divorce...i cant see the pain that this will cause my kids...i dont know what to do anymore
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777
Member
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777 |
First of all - you are not alone. I am here.
I looked for trains to park in front of.
Do you have kids?
foundareason D: March 2006 (xw - multiple a's)
I have found a NEW REASON!!!! A Treasure!!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,142
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,142 |
losttiger....
Looks like I'm the first one to see this........
Deep breaths, calm yourself. You are not alone. Many of us have been in this place.
Have you asked your H about this? What is his response?
I don't know your story.....but I know this feeling.
Everyone here said "Breathe". Any other advice to give I really don't know. I never thought about suicide myself, but my WH has threatened suicide several times.
But please know that suicide is no answer to ANY problem. It's only a way out. But there are other ways thru this pain.....counseling, friends, family, church.....you need someone to talk to.
Call the suicide hotline if you can find no one else to talk to. They are there 24/7.
I've been thru a long dark tunnel with all that my WH has done......there IS light at the end of the tunnel.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Kathy
AKA UnMoved
Me55
WH 53
Married 34 years
Son 32; Daughter 30
A for 5 years or ? WHO KNOWS???
D-Day May 15, 2004
D finally final Friday, October 13, 2006
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243 |
two...got two options car in the garage or take all my meds at once....maybe i should just be committed permanately it hurt so much the first time..i didnt think it could possibly hurt worse...i was wrong.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777
Member
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777 |
Duh! I did not read closely.
OK - have you served papers or been served?
There aint no divorce yet.
The pain we go through is INTENSE. I know. I felt it for a year or more. It goes away slowly.
But your character - the very essense of who you are - will be forever changed - for the better - through this. I know - little consolation - but something to ponder.
foundareason D: March 2006 (xw - multiple a's)
I have found a NEW REASON!!!! A Treasure!!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777
Member
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777 |
Lost. Do not take any pills.
Do you need to call someone?
The suicide hotline is an option.
Just keep typing. We are here with you.
Again - I KNOW THE PAIN.
Breathe. Slow down. Stop thinking for a minute.
foundareason D: March 2006 (xw - multiple a's)
I have found a NEW REASON!!!! A Treasure!!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,142
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,142 |
Thank God someone else is answering you too.
Losttiger, you don't have to stay in a marriage of lies. I have done so for 2 years.
It took me that long to finally see that my WH's lies were not my problem.....they were his. It took me that long to find my strength and self-respect. It all doesn't happen over night.
One step at a time.......
Kathy
AKA UnMoved
Me55
WH 53
Married 34 years
Son 32; Daughter 30
A for 5 years or ? WHO KNOWS???
D-Day May 15, 2004
D finally final Friday, October 13, 2006
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777
Member
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777 |
Next - picture your kids faces.
Who is the most qualified person to take care of them?
Your husband??????
I don't think so.
Ok. Breathe. Slow down. One step at a time.
It is OK to cry.
It is NOT OK to leave your kids.
foundareason D: March 2006 (xw - multiple a's)
I have found a NEW REASON!!!! A Treasure!!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777
Member
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777 |
OK - give me a sign.
Just type - I am here.
foundareason D: March 2006 (xw - multiple a's)
I have found a NEW REASON!!!! A Treasure!!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,142
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,142 |
You see......there it is....."Breathe".
Best advice yet. No pills. The fat lady didn't sing. So you know what that means....it ain't over yet.
The pain you are feeling IS an intense emotional pain. The worst I've ever gone thru.... but like Found said, it does go away.
We are all here for you. You are not alone in this.
Kathy
AKA UnMoved
Me55
WH 53
Married 34 years
Son 32; Daughter 30
A for 5 years or ? WHO KNOWS???
D-Day May 15, 2004
D finally final Friday, October 13, 2006
|
|
|
|
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 683
Member
|
Member
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 683 |
Lost,
Talk to us. You are in a lot of pain now.
Breathe. let it out. Bawling is allowed!!
Please slow down.
Can you try to think of one person who is very dear to you, and fix them in your mind very, very clearly. If no one comes to mind straight away, think of God.
If at the moment, you might be in such pain that your life might not seem very important to you - then keep yourself going for that person!!!
Can you call someone ?
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243 |
ok let me calm down and explain last May i found out that my H had an affair with a 24 year old he is 38. He said it was over after i found out then told me he was going on a business trip...it was really with her to say "goodbye" you know the story you read about it all the time here...FOG!!!!!!! it has been a rough go but i thought we were in recovery, but he didnt do full disclosures and i keep finding more lies...he said that it was in the past but he never told me the truth back when he had the chance...so i would react...sometimes extreme (threaten divorce, hurt myself) this is now his excuse for why he isnt honest with me now. But I saw that i was not doing my part that i was LBing so i made a decision that I needed to try harder...but i guess it is just to late. He will never trust in me and he wants to keep his secrets. He thinks that he has a right to have secrets from me. I dont know why but i thought i would check his phone tonight...found out that he has been talking to this other girl the whole time that we were supposed to be working on our marriage. He doesnt see that his EA is just as bad as a PA. To make this even a better story this girl is also 24 and the ex friend of his lover. Girl 2 cheated on her boyfriend and while she was cheating Girl 1 had an affair with girl 2's boyfriend. So again he is talking to a 24 year old who likes to cheat. Hey they sound perfect for each other dont they. So he thinks that talking to this girl is "just friends" BULLSH*T (will this get deleted....dont know) i am at a loss....i know that suicide is not an answer i just dont have any other ones at this time...believe me i really dont want to but like i said i am not feeling very strong about facing this alone and seeing the pain that divorce will cause them.. My son has heard us fighting and has made several comments to me about NOT getting divorced. no papers filed yet...he says he doesnt want to divorce...he just wants to i dont know have his cake and eat it to. He is not willing to do what it takes to make this work.. he just keeps shaking his head and saying i dont know what to do i am taking it one day at a time....then talks to his chippy.
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,142
Member
|
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 1,142 |
Hello ......Lost?
Check in please! We're waiting.......
AKA UnMoved
Me55
WH 53
Married 34 years
Son 32; Daughter 30
A for 5 years or ? WHO KNOWS???
D-Day May 15, 2004
D finally final Friday, October 13, 2006
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777
Member
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777 |
OK. So no divorce for at least 6 months.
That is a long time.
lets not talk about him for a while.
What ages are your kids?
I have three. 12, 7, and 4. I have the sweetest 7 yr old boy that there ever was.
foundareason D: March 2006 (xw - multiple a's)
I have found a NEW REASON!!!! A Treasure!!
|
|
|
|
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243
Member
|
OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 243 |
i have no one...the one person i had was my H.
i have no self worth anymore....i swear i ruin every relationship i have.
i know that my kids love me dearly and i love them...but i am in no condition to show them the way to life when i am so messed up myself
breathing...but getting dizzy chest hurts
stupid H is here with me....but now willing to make it work anyone want to say hi to him <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />
|
|
|
|
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777
Member
|
Member
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 777 |
And my 12 yr old girl is the most coolest kid around.
And the 4 yr old looks just like her mom. Gorgeous.
foundareason D: March 2006 (xw - multiple a's)
I have found a NEW REASON!!!! A Treasure!!
|
|
|
1 members (still seeking),
131
guests, and
60
robots. |
Key:
Admin,
Global Mod,
Mod
|
|
|
|