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Joined: Jan 2002
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have you questioned him about it??? If not..........look in the web for semem testing device and test it first to make sure that it really is semen.
I'd then question him and if he lies then you know for sure that something is NOT right.


Me-46yo + Husband-49yo
Met 1975/ Married 1980
H had 3 month affair/D-d January 2001
Grandparents since Dec.2005
Recovered and moving on and we're looking forward to the years ahead!
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He doesn't have cell phone? Does he use the computer at home? Those are usually the first places people look.

Can you search his vehicle, wallet, etc for things that just don't seem right?

When he had the 'just friends' relationship, did he ever admit it was an EA or PA?

Did the two of you go into counseling then?

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hubby doesnt use cell or computer, when I found out about the so called Friend to which he was seeing behind my back for 10 yrs he stated they were JUST FRIENDS to which I know now is a lie

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[understatement]Earthman is angry and his Caps Lock key is stuck[/understatement]

...so blame it on Canada


Sing loud for the sunshine, pray hard for the rain.
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My husband had a stain on his underweear last weekend when we were spending the night at my parent's house (they live out of town). He was horny, but we were at my Mom's & right above their bedroom, so I told him "no way!" Anyhow, the next morning he woke up with a giant stain on his undies, that was not there when we went to bed. Now, he was with me all night, so I know he didn't run out & cheat I was teasing him about it and he confessed he had a wet dream. Said he hadn't had one of those since he was a kid, and assumed it was because he was horny before we went to bed but we didn't do anything because we were at my parent's house.

Recently a girlfriend of mind found a pair of her H's undies with some "seaman residue" on them (but this was just one spot), and she's now very suspicisous that he is having an A. I say it's definitely a red flag.

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I think the fact that he was behaving 'hyper' after a Sunday job and that he tried to conceal his underwear at the bottom of the hamper are big red flags. I'd definitely start snooping to back up your gut feeling.

Is it usual for a woman to check her husband's underwear for stains? And what are BVD's? I think I've led a sheltered life!

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Before my husbands affair............I NEVER would of thought about checking his underware for anything!!!!
This behaviour started after the affair!!!! But I don't do it anymore......well.......only every few months. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

I also don't know what BVD's are......hmmmm

bb


Me-46yo + Husband-49yo
Met 1975/ Married 1980
H had 3 month affair/D-d January 2001
Grandparents since Dec.2005
Recovered and moving on and we're looking forward to the years ahead!
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Oh my goodness..

Why don't you just ask your husband what the ****** is going on and what the stain was and see what his reaction is. You can also share with him that this was something you noticed during the last fiasco...

Why fester in doubt.. Ask him and I suspect after 30+ years of knowing someone, his answer will tell you the truth...

Sorry for the comments... checking underwear is still just very funny to me....
Infidelity is NOT.... and I'm sorry if I offended your feelings over that..

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BVD's are a brand. Also a generic term for briefs.

Don't you girls know ANYTHING? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />


Me (BS) 36 FWW 35 Married 5/25/91 DS-7 DD - Born 11/8/05 !!! PA #1 12/1996 PA #2 4/01 to 1/04 NC 1/04 There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread. - Mahatma Gandhi Don't think exposure is a good idea? Go here... From Harley Himself
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Can we really not say the word "H e l l" Mr. Moderator???

and someone had the EGGS to call me a child..

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I live in Asia AND I'm English. BVD has never been uttered in my presence!

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blossom,

Sie sprechen deutsch und sie sind von Canada?

-issue at hand-

I'm not taking sides on this, but is it possible he might have an infection or an abnormality down under?


In the pasture of life, don't be a cowpie. FWW 22 BS 26 (me) d-day May 30, 2004 March, 2005 January, 23,2006
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Quote
I live in Asia AND I'm English. BVD has never been uttered in my presence!

Hardly and excuse! I've been informed on a number of occasions that girls know it all. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />


Me (BS) 36 FWW 35 Married 5/25/91 DS-7 DD - Born 11/8/05 !!! PA #1 12/1996 PA #2 4/01 to 1/04 NC 1/04 There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread. - Mahatma Gandhi Don't think exposure is a good idea? Go here... From Harley Himself
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My vote is strip club!! Hopefully, that's not considered adultery to you Aptiva and you can move on... Seriously....

******

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Ich verstehe. Ich bin in 3 Sprachen unwissend. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />


Me (BS) 36 FWW 35 Married 5/25/91 DS-7 DD - Born 11/8/05 !!! PA #1 12/1996 PA #2 4/01 to 1/04 NC 1/04 There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread. - Mahatma Gandhi Don't think exposure is a good idea? Go here... From Harley Himself
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Meine Güte.........Du sprichst aber fabelhaft Deutsch!!!
Wie kommt das??

bb
How did you learn that???


Me-46yo + Husband-49yo
Met 1975/ Married 1980
H had 3 month affair/D-d January 2001
Grandparents since Dec.2005
Recovered and moving on and we're looking forward to the years ahead!
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***************The suggestion is that you "take a hint" earthman!!**************ENOUGH!!**********

Any problems or questions feel free to email me

JustUss2@aol.com

Last edited by Justuss; 03/17/06 12:04 PM.
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Earthman, what's wrong dude?

Why are you so hostile on this thread?

I read other posts of your's and you seem like a different person. You ok today? Seriously. No sarcasm here. I know you have hard times and I know how frustrating and tragic they can be. Dealing with a loved one who has real depression is not fun. I know this firsthand just like you man.

Take care of yourself.


Sing loud for the sunshine, pray hard for the rain.
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EarthMan
even if I don't totally agree with you..........you crack me up!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
How old are you and how long have you been married??? (I'm just interested)
I honestly accept your point of view but consider one thing please..................
Women are "different" than Men..if you haven't noticed that by now. We smell then things are not right miles away.....believe me.
My husband always had approx. the same point of view as you do.............he told me I was exagerating or whatever but BOY has that changed!!!!
He trusts my gutt and when something stinks.......believe a woman!!! It stinks!!!!!!
bb
BTW: I've been married for somewhat over 25 years and my husband NEVER had stains in his pants except when he was having an affair!!!!

35-45 - Married 10-15 years. I'm a BS and living with someone with clinical mental illness... and we have 2-4 small children. Serious stuff.. so excuse me for having some levity here over panty stains.

Oh.. and I've never exploded in my pants... but lord knows I've had my share of stains in them ... ;-)

On a related note, should a man be concerned about any leakage stains found in his women's panties should the husband be the one playing the panty police in the house? Just curious.....

What do you think girls? Double standard here or what.. P-lease..

and it's all still VERY hilarious to me..

***********edit***************

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I had a similar question as I just started to do my H's laundry and find stains on every pair of underwear (black underwear). Not large one's but enough to know he was definaltey excited and 'leaked' a bit. He sleeps on the couch and we used to have sex 4-5 times per week, now we're lucky if we do 2 times per month. He is in withdrawl from our marriage, but is getting excited about something...

my red flags are up, the stains are still there... but I wonder if he's just waking up with a natural (because we're not doing it) erection and the stain is from that. I mean, the scientific way I understand the male penis to work, just because we don't do it, doesn't mean it doesn't go up several times a day for various reasons just because it misses being up, he is playing 'pocket pool' or whatever... my H also works in an all male field and could technically come and go as he pleases, but maybe I'm stupid, don't think he's had or is having an affair - I think it's just dreams (day or night) or whatever... does that make sense?


Me, hopeful wanting to save my marriage
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