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I have to admit, I'm curious about what's going on with you and G.
Hope all is well.
Karona
Divorced 12/17/2003
Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
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Thanks Karona...
It's not going well, I am planning to break up with her tonight. I'll have to post later, since now is not the best of times for me <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" />.
Thanks for thinking of me.
AGG
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I'm really sorry AGG. I won't press and I'm sorry for asking at the wrong time.
Thinking of you both. Karona
Divorced 12/17/2003
Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
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I'm really sorry AGG. I won't press and I'm sorry for asking at the wrong time.
Thinking of you both. Karona No problem at all, and no offense taken for asking <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. I just need to go through with it, and lick some of the wounds, before coming back here and sharing it all... But in time, I will. It really spiraled out of control quite quickly, I'm afraid. Thanks again for the thoughts! AGG
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Y/W! Your nibby friends here will be around when you're up to it!
Take care. Karona
Divorced 12/17/2003
Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
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Oh man AGG, I'm really sorry to hear that <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" />.....
I'd been thinking about you guys and feared your silence indicated trouble. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />
Hang in there....we're all thinking of you and we'll be here to offer up support when you are ready
Hugs! DW
DW--BW....separated/divorced since 2003 Re-married 7/09!
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AGG, I don't post much, but I was really hoping for a happy ending to your dating situation!!!!!! We are thinking of you......
Me, 49 Divorced 3-13-03 son 21, daughter 18, daughter 16 “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland” (Isa. 43:18, 19).
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It really spiraled out of control quite quickly, I'm afraid. Hey buddy, just saw this.... Don't know if you still have my e-mail or not, but if you'd like it just ask..... And if you need an understanding ear on the phone, let me know.... (((((( AGG))))))))
Hugz, Thoughtz, & Prayerz
Bill
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Hey buddy, just saw this.... Don't know if you still have my e-mail or not, but if you'd like it just ask..... And if you need an understanding ear on the phone, let me know....
(((((( AGG)))))))) Thanks, bud, it means a lot to me. At this point, I am doing all I can just to keep from tossing my cookies, so let's hold off on the chat <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. But I appreciate the thoughts and the support. BTW, FWIW, which is very little, I think I finally figured out what is "wrong" with G - she has all the classic symptoms of hoarding/OCD disorder. Not that it matters, there are other issues, and I will spill soon enough. But first I gotta deal with the breakup, and I don't think it'll be smooth/easy/happy. Ugh <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />:(. AGG
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I'm sorry AGG.
I know I don't post much, but I recently broke up with a guy I'd been dating for 7 months. It sucks. It hurts. But, it is not devastating.
Good luck.
personal recovery
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At this point, I am doing all I can just to keep from tossing my cookies Put the cookies down slowly and step away from them, do not toss them, roll them, or make any sudden movements towards them..... Ohhhh Wait... Man, I burned a batch of cookies about a month ago, man, I put those bad bears in the closet for next winter.... They way I see it, I got a couple dozen chocolate chip hockey pucks..... Anywho, please do know that if you do ever need to chat, the offer stands..... I know in the years gone by, when I reached out, you were there and I really appreciate all the words you've offered me.... Even the ones I didn't want to hear and the ones that left me saying "Is AGG on crack!!!!!!!!!"...lol...
Hugz, Thoughtz, & Prayerz
Bill
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But first I gotta deal with the breakup, and I don't think it'll be smooth/easy/happy. Ugh <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />:(.
AGG So she doesn't really know it's coming? I'm really, truly sorry AGG <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> Good luck tonight....
DW--BW....separated/divorced since 2003 Re-married 7/09!
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Thanks Bill. The good news/bad news is that with all my dating and breakup "experience", G is simply joining the ranks of all the other disappoinments of the past few years. So, as sad as it is, I know the routine - pain, sadness, relief, and moving on. I know the drill.
But I did have particularly high hopes for G, because she truly was so different. At least at the outset. She cleared all of my standard red flag screens with flying colors - of course now I have a new one added to the list <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />.
While I will wait till later to go over the stuff with y'all, I am happy with myself for at least one thing - I did not miss or rationalize away a single red flag with G. The stuff that is causing us to split now is simply me finally putting together all the trees to see the forest (love that analogy, and I apologize for not remembering who gets the credit - DW? nams? B2M?). But, I made note of all the trees the first time I saw them.
Well, I have a nice evening planned today, with THE talk hanging over me.
AGG
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So she doesn't really know it's coming? No, not really. We did mention a few days ago that we need to step back and analyze if we would be happy together, so this is how I plan to start the chat. But when I think of giving her a heads up that "we need to talk", it'll simply make her antsy and a wreck for the rest of her workday, so I don't see the "benefit". I'll try to be gentle this evening <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" />. AGG
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So she doesn't really know it's coming? No, not really. We did mention a few days ago that we need to step back and analyze if we would be happy together, so this is how I plan to start the chat. But when I think of giving her a heads up that "we need to talk", it'll simply make her antsy and a wreck for the rest of her workday, so I don't see the "benefit". I'll try to be gentle this evening <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" />. AGG Good plan AGG..... God, I'm SOOO bummed for you. Really. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" />
DW--BW....separated/divorced since 2003 Re-married 7/09!
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AGG~~ I REALLY need to take lessons from you. You are dealing with this so rationally it seems. I'm still messed up from the guy I dated for only 5 weeks.
I hate it for you of what lies ahead tonight.
Thinking of you. Karona
Divorced 12/17/2003
Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
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You are dealing with this so rationally it seems. Well that's both the blessing and the curse of my personality, I'm afraid... Thanks for the thoughts and support, K! AGG
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Sorry to hear this AGG... Every post-D MB relationship that starts out as promising as yours did gets me, probably all of us, excited because your success gives me/us hope (as well as the fact that you really are a "good guy" and deserve to be in a happy, healthy relationship!).
Knowing what's coming tonight must be nerve wracking. I hope tomorrow will be a better day for you.
FBS, D'day 12/00 * NC since 5/02 * divorce final 5/06 * property settlement 9/06
What you can do or think you can do, begin it. For boldness has Magic, Power, and Genius in it. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
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Oooh, I'm sorry for the disappointment of it all.
I had to smile when I read that the rational way in which you're dealing with this is both the blessing & curse of your personality. This statement reminded me of ex.
Though ex prided himself on his calm demeanor, his rationality, there was a time where what I viewed as his extremely low affect drove me to say some rather unkind things to him.
When the divorce papers were served to me the person delivering them stuck them in the front door. As I opened the door from the inside to greet my kids from the bus the papers fell to the steps. Had it been one of my boys opening the door they would have fallen on their head. They were not in an envelope.
This made me very mad as I had tried to call this man to set up a time to receive the papers without my boys there. Apparently I didn't work quick enough to satisfy him. Anyway, when ex came home (he was still living here & we had not told the boys of our plans to divorce yet) we sat across from one another. I told him how the papers were served & he looked at me with NO emotion. I told him I wanted to take a board & whack him on the head to see if any emotion would show up. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> Not my best moment. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />
My point being, don't be afraid to show this saddens you. Rational is one thing. Recognizing your life styles/personalities, what have you, won't work in the long term is good. Putting up the stoic front giving the rational list without any show of loss is another, very annoying & maddening, worthy of a whack on the head kind of thing.
You both had hopes & this is a loss no matter how right the decision is.
Formerly nam
here since 07/31/03
coastal, CT
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Putting up the stoic front giving the rational list without any show of loss is another, very annoying & maddening, worthy of a whack on the head kind of thing.
You both had hopes & this is a loss no matter how right the decision is. This is very helpful, and I will try to not hide my disappoinment and sadness (crap, I burst out in tears when I look at some of our photos together or hear some songs that remind me of her, so this shouldn't be too difficult to accomplish). My only (rational <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />) concern is that if I end up being too teary and sad, she might get the (wrong) impression that I am unsure about this decision. But I hear you, I'll try to be "human" with her and acknowledge the loss, for both of us <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />. AGG
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