I have a story I wanted to share with all the BSs here, and FWSs who are my brothers and sisters.

As some of you may know, I am in the military. I am working full time in an Army Reserve center with a number of other personnel. I am a Senior Non-Commissioned Officer.

I was affected by infidelity today. It was not mine. It was eye opening, and luckily I think it has a good message.

This morning, I arrived at work at the normal time. Upon entering my office, a few of my co-workers were talking with the civilian supervisor of the center and I catch the tail end of the conversation; parts like "The full-time green-suiters (this means army folks) are not going to like this" and "I talked with the old man(this means Commanding General) last night and he made the decision, not me". So, after hearing this and after the civilian boss left, I asked what the conversation was about. My co-workers proceed to tell me that there is a meeting a 8am for the section supervisors(mine is a GS-12) with the aforementioned civilian supervisor and then this “news that the green-suiters” will hate will be put out. Now, this is where my imagination runs for a minute. I think of the budget concerns that seem to have been hot lately and think maybe jobs are at stake. Not good. I think maybe some big change that is going to make things uncomfortable is coming down from on high and I wonder what THAT could be. Needless to say, the things I imagined were not good. I hadn’t even finished my first cup and the day was crap. Waiting for bad news just sucks.

8am comes and goes and my section boss returns. He sits us down and proceeds to tell us that me, another Sergeant First Class and a Master Sergeant are all affected by this change but that a Staff Sergeant in our section is not. Ok… I’m interested… come on with it already. He continues that Sergeant First Class X has received an Article 15 from the Commanding General and that all full-time soldiers of equal or greater rank will be part of the duty roster to enforce the punishment laid out in the Article 15. I think, “That’s it?”. Way better than what I imagined.

Now, an Article 15 is non-judicial punishment. In the military, there exists Courts Martial which would be just like in the movies. A trial with a jury, lawyers and a judge. A defendant and the Government as the plaintiff. Big crimes like murder, rape, burglary and so on. The Article 15 is non-judicial meaning there is no jury. The judge is replaced by a commander in the chain of command. The crimes are lesser offenses like loss of sensitive property or other ‘smaller’ offenses. The Article 15, however, still has serious teeth. The highest form of Article 15 is a ‘Field Grade Article 15’ which means it is an Article 15 issued by an officer of rank Major or higher. The punishment available in a Field Grade Article 15 is up to 45 days restriction, up to 45 days extra duty, forfeiture of pay and allowances, and loss of rank to include a combination of all four. It can hurt. SFC X’s Article 15 included 45 days restriction, 45 days extra duty and loss of 2 months pay, suspended… which means that IF SFC X screws up at all during the 45 days of extra duty and restriction THEN SFC X WILL lose 2 months pay. Not the maximum… but SFC X did get a pretty substantial punishment and the fact that a GENERAL OFFICER signed and issued this Article 15 is basically a career ender. Period.

Why did this happen? Why did SFC X get an Article 15?

Infidelity.

SFC X, it seems is an OW. She started a relationship with a married man in her home state (which is where the restriction part of the Article 15 does its job… she can not leave a 50 mile radius around the unit… her home state and MM are NOT within 50 miles). Of course, MM was ‘separated and getting a divorce’ and so on….. But here is the kicker. Exposure is EXACTLY what got SFC X on this. MMW called the command and reported the infidelity and the command stepped up and did its job. It took around 2 years from reporting to punishment, but this is solely a function of the fact that SFC X got a lawyer and spent a substantial amount of money trying to ‘defend’ herself. In the end, it did not work, although getting a lawyer and mounting a defense was her right.

How was I affected? First, without knowing what is going on, my morning was kind of crappy because of imagining what the bad news was and all the subversive talk about the issue. Not knowing WHAT was going to affect me, but that something was and I was not going to like it bothered me. Made me a little worried and angry, actually. Then, I found out what was going on and I was relieved, but I still had to endure the ‘dark’ unknown for a bit. Additionally, because SFC X has extra duty, someone must be present to make sure she executes this extra duty. Yes… like a babysitter. So, now a group of soldiers has been affected because one of us must be present to watch her and make sure she does her extra duty until mid-July. People will have to change schedules, work weekends and holidays they otherwise would not have because of this. Two evenings in the next 45 days when I could be spending time with my wife I instead have to supervise SFC X to make sure she is doing her extra duty. Admittedly, this is being made easy for us by favorable adjustment of workdays and so on, but if the infidelity had not occurred, this group would not have been affected. We were all affected by this, even if the ways might be small. One person’s selfishness signs a large group of people up for changes and issues they did not ask for or even know would be coming.

Now.. the good message.

1) Exposure can work. It did here. This is an example of exposure ‘breaking up’ the affair. For 45 days, SFC X must not do ANYTHING wrong lest the suspended forfeiture of pay happens. She can’t leave to be with MM because he is ‘out of reach’ in another state due to the restriction. MMW is obviously fine with pulling the trigger on exposure, so if MM comes here, SFC X will have more problems. The punishment was significant and it gives MMW 45 days to do whatever she feels she needs to. Maybe she was just vengeful and really was divorcing MM so all she was after was hurting SFC X, the OW. Don’t mess with the bull… you might get the horns. Maybe MMW really wants to work on the marriage and by my count, 45 days seems like a realistic amount of time to have MM exit withdrawal. There could be any number of variables here… but the overall point is that the BS did her part, exposed and it resulted in actions that enable the end of the affair. Score one for the BS.
2) The Army was faced with infidelity and showed that it was an enemy of such. The core values of Loyalty, Duty, Respect, Selfless Service, Honor, Integrity and Personal Courage meant something at my unit today and at the end of the day, I was proud of my uniform, my service and my unit. Score one for the Army.
3) An affair was exposed and not ignored. It was not accepted. Punishment was handed down. The affair was damaged, if not destroyed. Score one for marriage.

I must admit something. One of the BIGGEST reasons I posted this is because I am hoping that it can be an inspiration for BSs out there on the verge of exposing and trying to break up the affair, but maybe they don’t see the point. Maybe they are scared and nervous about it. Maybe they don’t see how it can work. I hope you can see here. With SFC X ‘out of the picture’ because lets be honest… she is going to be busy, the MMW has an opportunity to do something to fix the marriage, if she so chooses.

Exposure is the biggest weapon you have to break up the affair. Something like this could happen if you use it. I think that is a good thing.

Good night.

Wow. Patriot - great post. Thanks for sharing. As one who missed a golden opportunity to expose, this is meaningful.

Also great to see how serious the miliarty takes infidelity. You absolutely should be proud of the uniform - upholding valuable standards. I've been reading some posts that have lead me to believe that the church is way more forgiving... Which seems backwards to me.

Thanks again. Inspirational.

Thanks for telling the story, Pat. Very informative and chilling for those in the U.S. military.

Please consider posting to the Affair Exposure 101 thread linked below and linking this post in an appropriate place - maybe in the sub thread, On exposing the affair in the workplace.

Ok, yes, I'm an Army wife, and yes, after nearly 17 years I can honestly (but lightheartedly) say I detest this little interjection, but......

HOOAH!!!!!

My FWH's Article 15 was suspended on one condition--that he maintain absolute NC. One slip, and he would have been mincemeat. Too bad the strong hand didn't follow us when we moved...

Thanks for sharing, Patriot. Wonderful story of how those core values are working!

What a great example of exposing, Patriot.

Well done!!! (standing ovation, clapping............)

Thanks for posting the story, Patriot.

***Not knowing WHAT was going to affect me, but that something was and I was not going to like it bothered me. Made me a little worried and angry, actually.***

Now you know how a BS feels, only it's 24 hours a day.
Mulan