Will

You are feeling FEARful, fearful of doing PlanB, feaful of what has to happen if PlanB still fails, divorce. This fear makes us BS cling on desperately.

The lies & deceptions you're putting up with now is much worse than divorce. Divorce may not the worst! False recoveries, lies & deceptions are. You must realise & believe this in order to have the strength & courage to do what's needed to save your M

Go read Carrot & Stick of Plan A & Preparing for Plan B, both by pepperband, under Just Found Out. Reading the book, we may miss some points. These 2 threads saved my sanity & my M.

Your story touched me deeply as it's very similar to mine. My FWH started A with OW in my last trimester too. They even went holiday together days after my C-section delivery! When I discovered, I was at the endofmyworld but those 2 threads helped me get to where we are now. We are newly FWH & FBW.

My FWH also refused divorce from day 1 of discovery & my kids was strongest pull factor for FWH. I did everything needed in Plan A & when I've convinced my mind & heart that divorce is better than lies & deception, I kicked FWH out. And that did it, for FWH to have a flavour of life without his kids.

I'm in no position to advise you cos I'm still learning. Read those threads & deal with your own self - self discovery & recovery

God bless

endofworldnomore

will

Most important, NC is non-negotiable.

You have the military working arrangement as a hindrance, I had my own, others theirs. Whatever the obstacle is, it is a MUST.

NC has its consequences. No NC also has its consequences! You choose

endofworldnomore