Hello to all, I feel I know all of you. First post after being a avid viewer and learner for over 3 years. Wish I knew then what I know now and hope to add my .02 from time to time.

Welcome to a fellow lurker!

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H jasmine, welcome!

Welcome! So, what's your story? Are you dating now? Fill us in. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Thanks for the welcome. A brief synopsis: Divorced 2003 from college sweetheart after nearly 20 years of marriage. Both conflict avoiders and really coasted through first 12 years of marriage, raising three children. Multiple starts with marriage counseling in the last 8 years as XH use and abuse of home and work computer with porn and dating sites escalated. With each discovery, my self-esteem, worth and dignity diminished. Fast forward to his brief and overt PA. When confronted, he left and didn't look back.

I did a stellar Plan A for six months, although I didn't know what it was at the time. My love bank reached zero as he made no attempt to communicate with me, let alone show any interest in salvaging the marriage. The OW dumped him within two days and he quickly became engaged to another woman, fifteen years his junior with a baby. I filed for divorce and have learned so much since.

This second woman also dumped him about a year ago and he says he is 'healing'. My family was supportive and loving to me and the kids and we have come through OK.

Started briefly dating one year after divorce, a date here or there but no one who I would have wanted to explore more of a relationship with...until I met B.

I thought this was a man who I could grow old with and thought he felt the same. Sadly, I was mistaken and the relationship ended in June...badly. I am very hurt and sad, but know I can learn from this and move on yet again.

I have come to learn so much, especially about myself since I've come here. Thanks for listening.

Bump...so you will know my backround.