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#1769454 11/15/06 04:52 AM
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Karona Offline OP
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I didn't want to threadjack LT~

But I just read that your property settlement finally has come to an end.

I wanted to say that I'm happy for you and I hope you came out as well as you deserved to.

Fill us in if you wish.

Karona


Divorced 12/17/2003 Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
Karona #1769455 11/15/06 11:34 AM
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Hi K, great to see you and thanks for asking. I wrote to you on your other thread a few days ago...

Amazingly, after all these years, XH showed up without a lawyer. He seemed to be argumentative at first and, of course, that's what I expected. But, he really just wanted someone to give him an explanation of several points and he easily accepted the explanations given by either my lawyer, my accountant, or the judge. In the end, he accepted my offer as is, with some additional money thrown in to waive the right to petition later for spousal support - the judge was going to give him 2 years for this. So, it's all settled, except I still have to pay him. Today, I'll go to the bank to withdraw the money saved from the sale of our house for the 1st payment. I don't owe him the rest until June 1st of next year.

As I said on Lora's thread, I feel kind of a void now where I was pouring all that energy for so many years, even though nothing has really changed. I'm hoping for some positive changes soon...

Hope things are going well in your world!


FBS, D'day 12/00 * NC since 5/02 * divorce final 5/06 * property settlement 9/06 What you can do or think you can do, begin it. For boldness has Magic, Power, and Genius in it. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
LetSTry #1769456 11/15/06 01:00 PM
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Karona Offline OP
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I can't think of a better way to begin a new year than with a clean slate LT.

You've been waiting a long time for this day to come. I can't imagine the weight that has been lifted from you knowing it's behind you.

I hope for you, that there are some positive right around the corner! It's time!!

Glad things went so smoothly for you.

K!


Divorced 12/17/2003 Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
Karona #1769457 11/15/06 07:30 PM
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Wow, that sounds great really, after all the stalling and issues to have it be anticlimatic must have left you sort of wondering what it was all about. Yikes, I hope you have paid him enogh spousal support to last a lifetime.... smart to cut off that option now... in 2 years he will have blown through the money and be looking for more.

Take some time to relax and enjoy your freedom from this episode... can you take a trip or something to really enjoy? At least a massage or pedicure? Take care L, I am so happy for your news.


Lora
Lora #1769458 11/16/06 12:15 AM
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Thanks Karona and Lora, I'm starting to adjust already. At work today, one of my nurses made an announcement about me being the sole owner. I realized most of my employees never even met my XH and it went right over their heads. It's weird looking around and realizing it's really all mine now and I can finally move forward with the plans I've had for years. It's also kind of scary to do it alone. XH and I were great at making dreams become realities when it came to being business partners.

Lora, You're still an inspiration to me and I'm so glad you're happy! I signed up on e-Harmony almost 2 months ago, didn't limit the area at all, and haven't gotten one match yet. It's probably a good thing since I'm still nursing a broken heart from my brief relationship this summer - something I know Karona can relate to! I intend to put my focus on building a house and growing my business for now...


FBS, D'day 12/00 * NC since 5/02 * divorce final 5/06 * property settlement 9/06 What you can do or think you can do, begin it. For boldness has Magic, Power, and Genius in it. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
LetSTry #1769459 11/16/06 11:36 AM
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Congratulations!
I does take too much energy for all that legal stuff.
And I recall the letdown too. There is relief that it is over, but then thoughts of all the time and energy wasted.

Live your life and enjoy it!


It was a marriage that never really started.
H: Conflict Avoider, NPD No communication skills (Confirmed by MC) Me: Enabler
Sep'd 12/01, D'd 08/03.
My joys and the light of my life: DD 11, DD 9
*Approach life and situations from the point of love - not from fear.*
newly #1769460 11/16/06 12:22 PM
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Thanks newly, We sure have all been around here a long time, haven't we? I'm actually feeling better already. It was just a momentary twinge after all. As I said, I'm focusing on moving forward with house and business plans rather than on not being in a relationship. As I learned in Al-Anon:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference!


FBS, D'day 12/00 * NC since 5/02 * divorce final 5/06 * property settlement 9/06 What you can do or think you can do, begin it. For boldness has Magic, Power, and Genius in it. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
LetSTry #1769461 11/16/06 02:10 PM
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I still need to engrain that lesson into my mind.

I'm planning to re-read "The Prayer of Jabez" over the holiday. I need to re-ground myself.

Stay strong and proud of all you've accomplished. We are all strong women around this site. Those of us who have stayed on longer, probably had very odd situations.


It was a marriage that never really started.
H: Conflict Avoider, NPD No communication skills (Confirmed by MC) Me: Enabler
Sep'd 12/01, D'd 08/03.
My joys and the light of my life: DD 11, DD 9
*Approach life and situations from the point of love - not from fear.*
newly #1769462 11/16/06 02:58 PM
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Karona Offline OP
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Quote
I'm still nursing a broken heart from my brief relationship this summer - something I know Karona can relate to! I intend to put my focus on building a house and growing my business for now...


Ouch! it still hurts a tiny bit. Talk about a guy I could see myself with for a long time....he was one!

So LT? How is eHarmony working for you? I didn't care for the site mostly because they didn't have anyone near me. Closest person was 2 hours away. Hope you have better luck.

K.


Divorced 12/17/2003 Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
Karona #1769463 11/16/06 06:13 PM
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newly, I think you're right. Those of us who've been around the longest often had pretty messy and complicated situations to deal with...

Karona, I felt the same way about Mr. 11-weeks. The hardest part for me is that finding someone I feel that way about is so rare, especially living so close, that I fear never finding anyone I feel that way about again.

I haven't had any luck on e-Harmony. I joined right after my divorce was final at the beginning of May and dated one guy one time. He was nice but I felt no real spark, and I'd already met Mr. 11-weeks. I rejoined about 2 months ago and still haven't received one match, even though I didn't put any geographic restrictions on it.

I've met a few guys on the regular sites but one of us has dropped the communication. I haven't really been interested. I don't think I'm over Mr. 11-weeks yet so I'm better off focusing, for now at least, on work and finding things to do with friends.


FBS, D'day 12/00 * NC since 5/02 * divorce final 5/06 * property settlement 9/06 What you can do or think you can do, begin it. For boldness has Magic, Power, and Genius in it. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Karona #1769464 11/16/06 07:46 PM
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Here is my Eharmony story.... I filled out the questionair sort of on a dare from Resiliant. I did like the part about it maching personalities instead of looks like alot of the other sites, and God knows I was not feeling like I had done so well in choosing the first time around, and did not want that typre of personality again.

I didnt join then, it was the fall, and I go only a few matches.... one was my new hubby. He was ending a relationship and moving and didn't really persue it either, and then 6 mo later he contacted me. I think he is perfect for me.... our needs are met efffortlessly at this point, and he is not defensive and encourages me to speak out and share my feelings.

For our wedding.. eharmony sent us a crystal bowl from tiffanys......

I am sure it does depend on your area, and men may not be as drawn to it as the more visual sites.... But I was looking for someone who was ready to be in a healthy shareing relationship, and I am happy we found each other.

So take your time,and who knows.


Lora
Lora #1769465 11/17/06 09:49 AM
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Thanks Lora, I originally joined e-Harmony because of you and your success there! I don't know why I haven't received even one match in 2 months though. Last May, I got probably 10 within about the same amount of time though I was only contacted by 2 - the guy I briefly dated and another guy who wanted someone to go to Australia with him and asked for my phone #. When I said I'd rather get to know him better 1st, he never replied. So, I'm still a member, even though I've got no matches, but as you said, who knows?


FBS, D'day 12/00 * NC since 5/02 * divorce final 5/06 * property settlement 9/06 What you can do or think you can do, begin it. For boldness has Magic, Power, and Genius in it. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

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