What happens? How long does it take? What are the steps? How does time with the children get split up?

I don't want a divorce buy my wife does.

I just want to know how it will work if we get to that point.

Each state and circumstance is different. You may want to call an attorney for the accurate answers. Usually the first consultation is free.

I will say this though, the one who files usually pays a higher legal bill.

And it's no fun. Most of the time, no one wins.

There are two factors to be addressed:

Let’s that the easy one first: the Law.

When a union (marriage) is dissolved both parties are no longer responsible for the other personal needs, care and warfare. This of course only applies to past partners that have no children and/or property. If property is present/ownership then this can be decided by both parties of interest. If a decision can’t be agree upon then a court can intervene and by judgment come to some agreement. When children are present in a union of matronly the needs and depending on the age of the child are to be consisted as “the best interest of that child”. The custody of that child will be made by the parents unless they can’t agree. Then it will be decided by a court of law.

Now the hard part: The relationship:

The breakdown of a relationship have many variables, depending mostly on the emotional and mental state of each party involved; Some pass partners can have a easy time of dissolving the relationship/marriage in part of some and/or whole agreement(s) on property and children. Of course this happen very little. Disagreement between both parties and emotional state of “self”. Can cause a dissolving of a relationship/family great pain, hurt and resentment. Some factors to be consisted before entering this aria: Time in relationship, Best interest of children, property, businesses and any investment both monetary and emotional.

I am on the path to divorce, and it is no fun. Especially if you dont want it. Belive me, in the end nobody wins in a divorce. The BS is hurt beyond belief, the childrens lives are turned upside down, and the WS eventually comes to reality and realizes what he/she has done. Depending on the person, the WS may eventually wonder why he/she didnt change to save the marriage.

Just remember, if you have children THEY ARE NOT PAWNS. They will go through enough, so dont pit them against her. That also goes for her, and if she does, resist the temptation.

Im sorry for rambling, its just I loathe divorce....what a thoughtless way to destroy the lives of ones you once loved.

ditto and couldn't agree with you more!!!!

Ditto to loathing divorce. How is there a more humane way to end a marriage? I can't figure it out, especially with a child or children involved when obviously you have to interact for the rest of your lives? There had to have been love at some point in any relationship and the system sucks.

Too bad some people just don't get it, huh? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

I just spent a few hours today with my atty working on the property settlement part and finalizing language for the permanent custody arrangement.

My heart is a mess (and yours will be too). It's such BS when a WW or WH are so desperate to get out that they cause so much turmoil.

It is not fun so avoid it at all costs.

ht -
sorry to hear about your situation. Not at all looking forward to that stage and hoping it doesn't get that far.

Good luck to you. God Bless.

I have an appointment with an attorney next week, consultation for the first time. I haven't decided if I should file or not.

When I spoke to WH last week and asked him if he wanted a D, he said he didn't but thought we were headed that way b/c he can't expect me to wait forever(my 6 mos. are longer than he said he thinks he would have waited) and he doesn't know when he'll be able to tell me that he is coming back.
Nice, huh?!

So now I need to see where I stand, my options, and my rights. But those of you who have unfortunately gone through this, what kinds of questions should I ask at the first meeting with attorney?