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Marriage Builders Forums Our Archives Archived Read-Only Posts Inactive: General Questions affair ongoing

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affair ongoing #1820620 02/03/07 07:19 PM
Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 126 Texas S snr419 OP Member
OP snr419 Member S Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 126 Texas	found out today the affair is still going on...it never really ended....what do i do now BS-27(Me) WS-29 D-Day-April 10 2006 stay at home mom 2 kids (23 months and 10.5 months) NC-April 26 2006 D-day 2 2/3/2007 d-day 3 2/27/2007 d-day 4 6/15/2007 (OW says she is pregnant) "A woman is like a teabag; you never know how strong she is until she gets into hot water."

Re: affair ongoing snr419 #1820621 02/03/07 07:37 PM
Joined: Jun 2005 Posts: 1,496 M MicheleG Member
MicheleG Member M Joined: Jun 2005 Posts: 1,496	(((((((((((((SNR))))))))))))) So sorry to hear this. How did you find out? Hang tight, ya know weekends are slow. What do you want to do? BW(me) DDay EA 4/05 DDay PA 6/05 In recovery

Re: affair ongoing snr419 #1820622 02/03/07 07:40 PM
Joined: Mar 2006 Posts: 72 C cantgiveup Member
cantgiveup Member C Joined: Mar 2006 Posts: 72	so sorry, snr. I am reading your past posts to get a better idea of your history. Hopefully some of the old faithfuls will read tonight and have good advice. hugs to you! me bs 30 FWH 31 dd 5y/o ds 2 y/o dday 1/27/05 plan a plan b NC 4/06 fwh quit job 6/06 ( office A) moved to new town 6/06 in recovery

Re: affair ongoing snr419 #1820623 02/03/07 08:48 PM
Joined: Feb 2005 Posts: 1,632 S shinethrough Member
shinethrough Member S Joined: Feb 2005 Posts: 1,632	snr, I'm so sorry that you find yourself in this mess...again!! What went wrong in your R? Did you allow contact to resume between the two of them? Dr. H is absolutely adamant about no C ever again for lifetime. You do realize this,.right? If you do not place this as your boudary, unfortunately, it will have it's toll on your M Has OWH been told of the A continuing? You must tell him immediately to make him aware. I'm so very sorry for what you must have to endure at this time. If I can help at all, please ask. Time to expose this to everyone you know. Don't hold back this time. All Blessings, Jerry

Re: affair ongoing shinethrough #1820624 02/04/07 11:39 AM
Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 126 Texas S snr419 OP Member
OP snr419 Member S Joined: Apr 2006 Posts: 126 Texas	he never gave our recovery a chance...because he never really ended it with her...if finally said last night that he needs help and he does think he is addicted...he stayed at a hotel last night and of course shes tracked him down...he called me while he talked to her through the door and he told her regardless of what happens to me and him he is done with her...he told her he owes me enough to give it a try...because weather he is with me or not we still have to have a good relationship because we have two children and he told her he is done with her forever...he said this time he felt different...he said it was done on his terms and i wasn't forcing him to do it...what do i do now...do i leave i am just so confused...and i still do love him...and i know deep down this is not the man he really is... BS-27(Me) WS-29 D-Day-April 10 2006 stay at home mom 2 kids (23 months and 10.5 months) NC-April 26 2006 D-day 2 2/3/2007 d-day 3 2/27/2007 d-day 4 6/15/2007 (OW says she is pregnant) "A woman is like a teabag; you never know how strong she is until she gets into hot water."

Re: affair ongoing snr419 #1820625 02/04/07 12:17 PM
Joined: Jul 2006 Posts: 146 A Almondeyes Member
Almondeyes Member A Joined: Jul 2006 Posts: 146	How did 2nd D-day occur? I think that makes all the difference. Did he come to you and confess that A is ongoing or did you find out on your own? Sorry, but if you found out on your own you better not believe a word that comes out of his mouth. If that is the case then it's time for plan B. Anyway how did OW just happen to find him at the hotel? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> Come on now, she isn't psychic if she knows where he is it's because he WANTS her to know. Your WH is deep in fog, cake-eating, fence sitting and all of that yucky stuff. He is pitting you against OW and making her responsible for the A. Don't fall for it...it takes TWO! If he wants to be rid of her he will find a way to make that 100% clear to her.

Re: affair ongoing snr419 #1820626 02/04/07 12:22 PM
Joined: Mar 2006 Posts: 72 C cantgiveup Member
cantgiveup Member C Joined: Mar 2006 Posts: 72	then he probably opened the door and let her spend the night. everytime I posted in defense of my FWH's wishy wash babble, someone would call me on it and tell me that that was code for " I still want to bone OW, and you (BS) are getting in the way." It ticked me off. I hated that. But they were right. I wouldnt believe jack squat about that little phone conersation. He is still in the A. Did you do a drive by to the hotel? Did you talk on the phone to him all night? How do you know that whole little scenario wasnt just the 2 of them buying time to be together? Do you want to save your marriage? Time to set some boundaries. hugs!

Re: affair ongoing snr419 #1820627 02/05/07 05:20 PM
Joined: Jul 2004 Posts: 2,033 SoCalNoCo K krusht Member
krusht Member K Joined: Jul 2004 Posts: 2,033 SoCalNoCo	SNR, ""found out today the affair is still going on."" AW JEEZE............what a bunch of crap! So you spoke to OW's H? And got the news on "the big one"? ""what do i do now"" SNR, I don't think YOU do anything besides continue on with plan A unless plan B is called for? It is up to him! How many times is your woosy boy going to say these things to you? Tell him to get a backbone and decide!! Sounds like the telephone call to you was him deciding, but as the one poster so eloquently put it, this may not be what he meant. I would lean to plan B, just to keep your sanity. That's all I got. So sorry you are going through this. Stay strong for you and the kids. k CORDUROY PILLOWS ARE MAKING HEADLINES!!

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