This is my 2nd go around with my wife having an affair. First time was with a man about 4 years ago. Got through that, and thought all was well. Couple months ago I suspected another affair, and recently found out it is with a woman friend of my wifes! My wife wants a divorce (standard reasons) and has plans to live with the other woman. I do not want our kids (boys aged 4 and 7) to be living with them. I have told my wife this, of course she got very agitated. Legally, I do not think there is anything I can do. However, the other womans family, I do know quite well, and they have no idea their daughter is gay, or having an affair with my wife.

What should I do to protect my kids?

Jive

Welcome again. Expose the affair to the other woman's family. Do you have proof?

if you get Divorced, i have seen divorce records that indicate that when the children are present, the parent can not have anyone else spend the night that they are not married to.
and if your state doesn't allow same-sex marriage, that could help you out.

Confused/Jive here. Had to make a new account so I could read/post on my threads.

I do have proof. Both my wife, and the OW have admitted to it. I also have copies of letters that they have written to each other. The OW I have talked to via TXT messages, and says she feel very guilty about it, and that if my wife wanted me back, that was fine, otherwise, she will be there for her. The OW does have a "partner" that she lives with, and to my knowledge, does not know.

As far as my kids, they have told me that mommy and the OW kiss/hold hands/hug all the time. I do not want my kids exposed to this! I have thought about contacting the OW's partner, or even further, the OW family. I'm just not sure how to go about it, or even if I should. Help!

Jive

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M 3-27-99
WS seperated 11-29-01?
In counseling
admits & ends? affair 12-25-01
agrees to work on M & back home 12-26-01
W back with OM 1-15-02
W preg. w OM's child
Seems to be no such thing in the world as the right decision.

Contacted the OW's partner last nite, and have a meeting with her today regarding what proof I have (plenty). We'll see how it goes

Jive

Had a conversation with the OW partner. She suspected the affair long before I did. Problem I've got now is it seems she is a bit unstable/crazy and is threating to "beat up" my wife. I was supposed to meet with her tonight to show her what evidence I have supporting the affair, but I think I will cancel that. Opinions?

Need to help/advice guys and gals. After exposing the affair, my wife is now not talking to me at all. It appears that the affair is, for the time being, over at the request of the OW. But my wife spent the evening in her room very upset and crying. I'm not sure what to do at this stage. I told her everything that went on in the conversation between the OW's partner, and even showed her the txt messages of said conversation. I was supposed to meet with the OW's partner tonight, but canceled that as enough damage has been done. Whatever deposits I had in the love bank have been majorly overdrawn! Bought her roses the day before yesterday. Found them in the trash. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" />

Confused - I'm in a similar situation as you. My wife cheated with another woman also. Although it might have been more of an EA than anything else. Unfortunately, that is not the first time it happened. I must say that my situation is a bit different than yours as far as the circumstances are concerned. If you're interested here's the link: http://www.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/sho...page=0&vc=1

I feel for you man! Your situation is much tougher because of the kids.

You just got to be ****** kidding me, i mean hiw much ****** are you going to take before its enough??

Your raising another man ´s child,she put you thrue so much the first tie around..You really need to start to look in to a divorce..She is so broken that you really cant help her..

Hello,

I have to agree with Marcus33. 4 years ago she engages in a sexual affair, puts your health at great risk for STD's, does not bother to use protection, lets herself get pregnant and you end up raising the OM's child and now this?
How much humiliation and disrespect are you willing to endure? Get a good lawyer and protect your children. Enough is enough. If the roles were reversed do you honestly think she would ever have put up with such crap from you?