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I took mine off about 2 months ago. I have considered putting it back on to show WS that I am serious about marriage.
He made a comment last week about how I should wear my rings so men don't hit on me.
Thoughts on this??
WS-36
BS (me)-28
4 Kids
A started Jan 07
________________________________
Then the time came
When the risk it took
to remain tight in a bud
Was more painful than
the risk it took to blossom.
-Anais Nin
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Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
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on off on off This was a rollercoaster ride for my poor ring as well <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> I DEMANDED (in a not-nice-way) that my WH remove his ring ... he did .... but he put it on again the next day ... which mad me mad (I was insistant WH be placed in a lose-lose position) TODAY I know better ... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />
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Divorced on 3/25/2008 but I have primary legal and physical custody of my 2 kids. Plan A Thread Plan B ThreadEphesians 5:25 - Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her
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I took mine off yesterday.
WW was not wearing hers at the court hearing Tuesday.
Testosterone boys! Testosterone! It ain’t just for nose, ear and back hair anymore!
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Joined: Oct 2000
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Since you are trying to PLAN A your [censored] off
have your ring cleaned so it shines like new
then ....
[b]WEAR YOUR RING
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 12
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I only took it off at home.
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I still wear mine.
I used to want her to wear hers - the more I think about it the less I care if she does or doesn't.
Nowwhat74
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I used to take mine off at night. I haven't had it off since all of this started
WH "lost" his back in July. I bought him a new one for our anniversary in Aug., which he rarely wore, which was a change.
Found out in one of our 2 counseling sessions that "it didn't fit right but he didn't want to tell me because he didn't want to hurt my feelings'
Oh yes,,,, having an AFFAIR hurts so much less???!!!???
BS (me)
ExWS -Drac
DD 9
DSS 15
D Day 11/06
Divorced 10/01/07
"You Can't Fix Stupid" - My Mom
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I carry them around with me, but I haven't worn them.
I am a person who believes in signs. I put my ring on after 2 months for one day. The SECOND I put it on, my finger swelled and turned purple! I couldn't get it off!!! I have lost a ton of weight, so it should have come off! I took this as
1) My body was rejecting the toxic wedding ring
or
2) God made my finger swell so I couldn't get it off and I would be stuck wearing it FOREVER!!!!
WS-36
BS (me)-28
4 Kids
A started Jan 07
________________________________
Then the time came
When the risk it took
to remain tight in a bud
Was more painful than
the risk it took to blossom.
-Anais Nin
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Joined: Nov 2005
Posts: 140
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I took mine off a month ago. WW has had hers off since exposure in Jan. 06. I felt like I was lying to myself.
BS (me) 40
WW 38
DD 10
DS 7
Got "I don't love you" letter 8/05.
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LHL,
I to felt like that. Then one day I thought I am gonna put it on to see how I felt about wearing it. See above post about how that turned out...
however I discovered that I missed wearing it. It still meant something to me. Even if he/she isn't wearing theirs, so what?
I ended up getting into a disagreement with WS and took it off again. But after reading the responses here, I immediately put it back on my finger. So far my finger is still flesh colored...no purple yet.....
WS-36
BS (me)-28
4 Kids
A started Jan 07
________________________________
Then the time came
When the risk it took
to remain tight in a bud
Was more painful than
the risk it took to blossom.
-Anais Nin
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Joined: Feb 2007
Posts: 75
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well, i took mine off and my H stole them... needless to say, i don't wear mine... yet, he didn't wear his...
so, if you're going to take them off, please please put them in a SAFE place...
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My ex took his off on D-day. I wore mine for 3 and a half years, until the day our divorce was final. Then off it came.
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Chrisner.....I know that hurt. I'm soooo sorry.
Holymoly....the purple finger incident....hilarious!
Pep.....you sig line is pretty funny. Also, I'm surprised I didn't pull the same stunt you did with your rings back in the day. I know it wasn't funny then, but it is to me now.
I too had lost some weight on the infidelity diet and my rings were loose. I kept putting off going to get them resized. A few weeks ago, I lost them sometime over the weekend and I have absolutely no clue where my wedding ring and band is. I am heartbroken. It was a beautiful ring. It does feel kinda weird that they're gone...sorta like a sign that old marriage is dead. I gotta tell ya though...I really want my ring back. We even bought a metal detector to try to find them, but no luck. I pray all the time about it.
Husband was unfaithful to me before and after our marriage, at least 7 times. I found out 13 yrs into the marriage. Trickle truth for an entire year. Several different d-days, so it was more like a d-year. Difficult recovery.
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I was like Pep. On, off, on, off...
I remember once sitting at a slot machine in a casino not wearing my ring when the lady sitting to next to me says, "so you're recently separated?" I was like, whhhaaa? How'd you know that? I had the "used to wear a ring there" tan line (and the permanent indentation) on my ring finger.
He "lost" his.
Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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I took mine off about 2 months ago. I have considered putting it back on to show WS that I am serious about marriage.
He made a comment last week about how I should wear my rings so men don't hit on me.
Thoughts on this?? holymoly - I kept mine on. I was married regardless of what anyone else thought, including my wife at that time. God bless you during this extremely difficult time.
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I took mine off on D Day and never put that one on again.
A few months before the A my FWW wanted a new ring. We didn't have enough money for a big one when we got married. So we upgraded hers.
Imagine my suprise when a few months later she had an A and said our M was over anyway. LOL. Still together today.
So I decided I didn't want that ring anymore either. She asked me to put it on I refused.
The inscription was "Always and forever".
Anyway. I told her I worked my tail off to buy her a new ring she can do the same.
I now have a White gold ring with 5 diamonds.
I wear it everyday.
BS 38
FWW 35
D Day 10/03
Recovery started 11/06
3 boys 12, 8 and a new baby
When life hands you lemons make lemonade then try to find the person life hands vodka and have a party.
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I had the "used to wear a ring there" tan line (and the permanent indentation) on my ring finger. took mine off on D-Day and I still got that My ring's in the top drawrer in the bath room. I can't decide what to do with it. I'll probably end up tossing it into the sugarcane field behind the house. Whatever I do I want to make a statement when I do it.
BS 33 EXWW 35 DS 5
OM1 9/06 - 03/07
OM2 04/07 - present
Divorced May 8, 2008
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Thank you for your blessings. This is the first time in my life where I got down on my knees and said "OK God...what's up. Evidently we need to talk. Go ahead and I swear I will listen this time"
For the last 2 months He has been talking and I have listened all but once. The wierd thing was that one time I didn't listen I was doing something out of anger, and after I did it anyway, felt SO WRONG. It was an odd feeling.
WS-36
BS (me)-28
4 Kids
A started Jan 07
________________________________
Then the time came
When the risk it took
to remain tight in a bud
Was more painful than
the risk it took to blossom.
-Anais Nin
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Joined: Jun 2006
Posts: 6,058
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Mine hasn't been off since I quit a job where I couldn't wear it around the machinery.
I had them tape it on during surgery this winter...twice.
Mark
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