Here's the deal- I am a stay at home mom. My husband makes the dough.
He comes home on payday and he hands over his check because I take care of the bills, buy the groceries, etc. when you are in a marrige, no matter WHO provides the income, everything that is his should be your and everything that is yours should be his.
There should be communication on anything effecting you and vice versa. I do have to say if my husband wants to get something nice for himself he has the right to do that because he is the one going to work all day long. He is the one taking care of me, our son togather, and my two daughters financially.
He went out and bought a full recording studio (he raps). I thought the money would have been better spent on the kids but I never uttered a word. He pays the bills and we are never without, therefor if he wants to splurge on a new passion so be it.
I think if you are married everything should be in both names period. hWhen the vows were made you took his last name right? This made you and him a united front right? When people are united they share monetary aspects, as well as physical and mental aspects, of their lives.
This is just how I was raised, all people are diffferent. Personally, if this is the only problem you have in your marriage and you and your family are well taken care of, yall are not in debt, then jump in and enjoy this passion WITH him. Get involved, if he fixes the homes up lend a creative hand. I know it is hard to do with kids but if the yards are fenced bring them along, take some toys and sprinkler and let them have at it : )
As far as the health aspect, go to MHMR (mental health and mental retardation center) I believe they have them in all states. I did not qualify for medicaid so I was not sure what to do when I had my bout of post-partum depression. I went to MHMR and set up an appoitment.
They assessed me and I was given appointments, medication, and therapy on a sliding scale fee, and the fees are really chep. The largest fee on the sliding scale is if you make 500,000.00 a year, in which the fee is 150.00 a month. This would ease some of your stress in that arena.
Ya'll are a family and in a family NOONE should have complete control- it is about respect, love, and caring. Everything should be equal, even with the children.
This is all just my opinion. You have a legitamate gripe, but you shoul;d ask your self if the gripe is really worth making you and your husband miserable?
You should also ask if the gripe is bad enough to where you and he cannot COMPRIMISE on the issue. Comprimise is the key to marriage.
