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#1916064 07/27/07 04:09 PM
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challengeoflife Offline OP
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Re: Spouse wants to buy college daughter a car as gift and get a loan for it
challengeoflife #1916065 07/27/07 04:20 PM
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SaturnRising Offline
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SaturnRising
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Can the brakes on her daughter's car be fixed?

Me: 45
Him: 47
married 23 years
Two wonderful sons
D-day for my EA: 8/15/04
D-day for his PAs: 8/16/06
Re: Spouse wants to buy college daughter a car as gift and get a loan for it
SaturnRising #1916066 07/27/07 04:32 PM
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MelodyLane Offline
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Well, I know in the matter of stepchildren, Steve Harley told my sister that her 2nd H was not to make decisions about her son, to leave that to her. Honestly, though, I don' know what he would say in this matter to you. And I am probably the last person qualified to answer you because POJA has been my biggest stumbling block.

I can tell you what worked in my marriage, though, in the matter of grown children.

With my son from my previous marriage, everytime my H has tried to intervene it has caused a huge explosion. I cannot express in words how deeply I RESENT my H's interference. I don't try to impose my parenting values on his relationship with his kids and he doesn't in mine. We are worlds away in how to treat grown kids. I believe in giving my son money for things he needs and he doesn't believe you should give a kid anything more than Christmas and b-day presents.

For the sake of peace, my H handles all matters concerning his children and I make all decisions concerning my boy. I don't ask him to pay for my son and he doesn't ask me to pay for his kids. This set up has worked very well for us.

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101
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SaturnRising #1916067 07/27/07 04:37 PM
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challengeoflife Offline OP
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Re: Spouse wants to buy college daughter a car as gift and get a loan for it
challengeoflife #1916068 07/27/07 04:48 PM
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MelodyLane Offline
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Are you married?

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101
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MelodyLane #1916069 07/27/07 04:52 PM
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challengeoflife Offline OP
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challengeoflife #1916070 07/27/07 04:53 PM
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