I'm sorry to hear about what you are experiencing. Was this man married before you married him? You say you have a step-child. How did this marriage begin?

Perhaps this is the Lord delivering you from a relationship that was not good for you.

I won't allow him in the delivery room. I will ask my mother and I am very close to my mother in law and also asked her to be there. I went through a tough time whether to give my baby his last name. I decided to give the baby his last name so my 4 year old son doesn't get confused and easier probably to get child support.

He was married for 6 months to a women that left him too and cheated on him. No, he has three children prior to me from three different women. My step son and daughter are only 8 months apart. So obviously, he resorted back to his old days of womanizing. After his first marriage crumbled he totally changed his life and was super active and strong in our religion and a good, honest man. We did everything right and by the book and had our relationship based on the Lord. He had a strong testimony and faith. I just knew he was the one for me and everything just clicked. We got married then two years after our marriage he cheated on me after my son was only 2 months old. He has had a total of 5 affairs on me that I know of, there could be more. He is a serial cheater and now left me for sure back in Sept. to live with this OW. This OW works with him and has done almost all the men in our small town and at work that they call her the "community bicycle". My H and OW work at a casino so not a good environment. He justs says now that "I've changed and a lot different than when he first met me." He admitts he has changed too.

For the last four years I have tried to forgive and trust him again. How can I completely do so when he keeps having affairs? I have no choice but to divorce and stop enabling him and tieing the Lord's hands but to let Him work with my H. to get him right again. What breaks my heart is him living this kind of life. I will always care for his welfare. He is still a child of God. The romantic feelings are slowly but surely fading away but it is hard to erase 6 years of marriage and about to have his baby anyday while he is shacking up with OW. I am trying to forgive and let go of alot of anger that I have cause I was a good wife and loyal and did my best to save my marriage but God can only help him now. I do pray for him and want him to change but I am trying to let go of the hope that we could work things out. It really breaks my heart about the kids. I think I miss the illusion of having a family together. I just pray that my kids will be okay through this mess and that the Lord will protect them. Sometimes I just pray to God to show me how to forgive this man and let go of him. I am so use to trying to help him but no one can help him until he humbles himself and come unto Christ. Thank you all for listening.

rejoiceministries.org

This is the answer, no need to question.

My wife's mother died on Thanksgiving.

Her dad found her in her chair early AM.

I just found out yesterday afternoon from my brother in law.


I am torn between hitting hard while she's down to finally settle this divorce up, or sending a sympathy card, then going for broke.

Her mom was one of those who faked a suicide every year or so for attention, I guess she finally got her wish.

I read this whole thing......and the ONLY thing that stuck out to me is that your H had 3 kids by 3 diff. women and you STILL married him??? Im sorry, but that says it all. Good luck and god bless. *shakes head*

When I met my H, he was on the straight and narrow. He was so good that I felt unworthy of him. But, we fell in love and we got married.

I just had our second baby. I have no family close and called my H to take our son early for his regular visitation time. When he got to the house I was on the floor having major contractions. I asked him to take me to the hospital. He did but dropped me off. I had an emergency c-section and they had to incubate me and take me under anthesia. It was pretty serious. All the nurses were really upset that he just dropped me off. He did come to the hospital to see his baby girl. He said he would give me diapers, he still has not gotten me anything for the baby. He gave me $61 for baby pictures and that is it. The baby had jaundice and was in the hospital six days. He then wanted to take her for an hour or two to show her off to his girlfriend. She is five weeks early, jaundiced and wanted to take her out already in the cold? I said no, and if he wanted to see the baby he could come to the house and I will go upstairs so he can have alone time. He got all upset and again said, "that is why we aren't together cause of me..." Anytime when he is not in control he gets upset.

I am really angry. I am trying to forgive. He just got a huge buck, he got $5000 from work for being a "good manager", and will get another $5000 for his x-mas bonus. I am barely getting by financially and raising our two children now. My mother said that Satan is keeping the wool over his eyes thinking that all these good things are happening and to keep him thinking that he is not doing anything wrong (committing adultery). But she said it isn't harvest time yet.

Why am I so consumed with wanting justice? The last four years of our marriage, he has had affairs on me and was sorry and repentful and I kept trying to forgive and work it out. I am sick of this trial in my life. We are going through a divorce now. I filed but I was forced too. I would do anything to save my marriage but he obviously isn't willing to change or get some help. I must move forward. I don't wish the worse for him but I feel my Heavenly Father doesn't care about me if I am struggling and doing what is right while my WH is seemingly getting everything he wants. I know in the end I will be the lucky one for keeping my faith.

My step daughter told me that my WH and his girlfriend had a fight cause this man keeps calling his girlfriend and she texted him back. My WH called up this man and threaten to beat him up.... It is so immature and high school. Part of me felt happy that his relationship is already starting to crumble. There relationship was started on lies and cheating. My H will continue to cheat and his girlfriend because that is all they know. However, why am I curious still as to what happens in his life? I am fighting to protect my children right now and retain custody. That could be a reason.

How can I truly move on and try to get over the hurt and all the lies. I just want restitution for the hurt he has caused. I know I need to give it to the Lord and be patient. Thanks for listening to me vent.

Congratulations on the birth of your beautiful daughter. I'm so sorry this wonderful occassion is overshadowed by all the crap your WH is throwing at you. I do believe the signs are there that his relationship is starting to crumble. Who knows why us BS's have that need to know what goes on but we do. Take care of yourself and your new baby. I'm thinking about you.

Suzanne, I think this is the key to your post. It is the other way around. He is not worthy of you. You need to find counseling (call United Way) to help you gain some self-worth so that you can protect your children. Your H sounds like he has abusive tendencies; you need to be strong, ruthless, and protective right now. If you get back together, it needs to be on your terms, not his. Otherwise your children will suffer.

PS congratulations.

I used to think XWH was wonderful and worked hard to keep him happy because I didn't think I was worthy of him. I tried to do everything I could to hold our marriage together even after finding out about A. When he still left me, I became angry and hoped that some terrible fate would fall on him so that he would see the error of his ways.

It took awhile, but now I realize that I was manipulated and was in a fog myself. I realize that I am a good person and deserve to be treated well. As I started healing, I refused to cave in to his manipulation and held out for a fair D settlement. You and your children are worth the effort. Don't let him guilt you into caving in. He's not worthy of the ground you stand on.

Justice has already happened to WH. With everything he has, he is still not happy. You're best revenge is to cut off the power he has over you and find happiness without him. Focus on those children and you will be blessed in ways he can never understand.

Also, forgive yourself. I know I've wondered whether my XWH was always so evil and maybe I just didn't see it. I choose to believe that I married a man that I loved but he is not the man I divorced. It's not my fault that he changed. It is my responsibility to protect myself and my children the best I can.

BTW Talk to your lawyer. Your WH should be required to pay some of the medical bills and child support.

Suzanne, many, many hugs. If you are in Southeastern PA, drop me an email. [email]greengablesmb@yahoo.com.[/email]
Having no family and a new baby is overwhelming.

Your WH is a patch of slime who through the miracle of God was able to father two beautiful children. No decent human being would drop you at the hospital for an emergency C-section. Period. End of discussion. That is not affair-induced fog. It is evil. The problem with evil is it is very, very good at masquerading as good. And, good people usually see the best in people. When this man comes crawling back to you, barricade the door.

Get in touch with your lawyer. Talk to Health and Human Services or the equivalent. In my state, you can get emergency, temporary child support. You need that. I’d be tempted to also as for all of the venison filet and half the ground venison, but that’s just vengeance.

Also, be really good to yourself. As you know, your hormones are out of control. You’re anxious because you have a premie. Life is tough right now. You’re a good person, and you’ll come out of this just fine.

I talked to my lawyer and she wrote a letter to his lawyer for him to start paying child support for our newborn daughter. If he doesn't voluntarily start, then we will have to go to court and he will have to pay for attorney fees for doing so. It is his legal obligation to pay for his daugther that he left. I just realized that my precious daugther did not have her mother hold her when shew as born cause I was completely under for my c-section. Her father wasn't even there. He just dropped me off at the hospital and left with my four year old boy to watch.

He got the letter this past week. Remember I have no family where I live. I am trying to move back home which is about a 2 hour drive from where I currently live. He has been calling up his family and asking them not to talk to me. I am very close to his family and they love me. I have step kids that I love and they love me. He is telling them not to talk to me or visit me. My one step son started to cry. My step daughter came over today to see me and her new sister. She is head strong and won't listen to her father's nonsense. I just felt really hurt. Why does he need to involve the kids. This was his decision to leave the family. I did nothing to him and so why does he want to hurt me and the kids now by alienating me from people I love? He must be feeling guilty, mad, and out of control.

I see a court appointd child psychologist in January. He will determine custody and whether moving would be detrimental or not. The one thing that my WH is using is that my son and newborn daughter have a brother and sister (my stepkids) and they won't be able to see them as much if I move. However, they are teenagers and they are getting more and more into being with their friends. I am coming to accept whatever decision is made for I am just giving it to the Lord cause it is out of my hands. I am trying my best to protect my kids. Thanks for letting me vent and listening to me.