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Thanks Mrs. W, because that's true. He's forgotten all about the affidavit or I would have heard from him through my attorney or at the very least an email from him, even though he's p.o.'ed.
And sure, there was a little demon in me that would have loved to have sabotaged him, both with this affidavit and the other court documents he forgot about because he was so involved in his A that I had to take care of it.
But there's no way my conscience would ever allow that. Even if it would have taught him a lesson.
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You are doing just fine, Charlotte. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Thank you, Melody. This is true.
The very last time Mr. Gray came over and we spent some time together, I actually DID see Jonesy come out. And that spark between us was definitely in evidence.
We even flirted with each other. It's the most fun I've had with him in months.
And he was so sweet when I walked him out to the car.
I could cry just thinking about it.
Now he's only Mr. Gray. I hope I see Jonesy one more time before going dark but I'm not counting on it.
And I fed him each and every time I saw him after exposure day. If he couldn't have the meal with me I sent plenty of it back with him. His favorites, too.
And he enjoyed it. And he has the letter and the bodice ripper. And he has the poem I wrote. That wasn't all that long before the hearing.
Last edited by Charlotte22; 11/28/07 05:58 PM.
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I don't see what choice I have BUT to go into Plan B. That's why I suggested calling the Harley's. Lots of us here have been at that same point, where we just don't see any other possible options. And that's most often when I've seen the Harley's come up with some very different ideas or plans than what the coventional advice from the board is, or from what other people have thought of. In my case, Steve helped me figure out a better plan than Plan B, and helped me figure out how to do it, too, when I thought there were no other options. That doesn't mean that Plan B isn't the best bet for you right now -- it might be. And I'm not trying to criticize the actions that you've taken or say that you're doing anything wrong. You've been remarkably strong. I am just concerned about the picture and tone that is being left for your WH as you go into Plan B. I certainly don't have a better plan or better suggestions ..... but I know that the Harley's usually do. And they are able to take into account all the special circumstances. Again, just my opinion, and not meant to contradict other advice that you've already gotten. -AmI.
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You are doing just fine, Charlotte. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Yep, she sure is AND she reminded me how to spell "affidavit" too! (I had to do a little editing! lol) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Mrs. W
FWW ~ 47 ~ MeFBH ~ 50 ~ MrWonderingDD ~ 17 Dday ~ 2005 ~ Recovered
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AmI...
I think the most important point here is that Charlotte's husband is an ACTIVE ADDICT...The Harleys would not advise Plan A in that situation...
Mrs. W
FWW ~ 47 ~ MeFBH ~ 50 ~ MrWonderingDD ~ 17 Dday ~ 2005 ~ Recovered
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Ami, her plan is perfectly sound and there is no reason to call the Harleys. Her H is an addict and what Dr Harley does suggest is Plan B in these cases. [there are no other MB principles that would be applicable]
You are clearly getting the wrong picture if you are concerned about the "tone" because she has done a good job of setting a very good tone. I think you misunderstood the environment becuase of her joking. But be assured that she has done a good job and there is nothing here the Harleys would find objectionable.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Thank you, AmI,
I guess it wouldn't hurt to try and call. I thank you for your input.
I'm just SO worried about that love running out through all of the holes that Mr. Gray has left in my heart.
I don't WANT anyone else to fill it.
But I'm still trying to patch up the damage that's been done. Gotta love Quikcrete! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> (okay, I don't remember how that's spelled but you get the idea!)
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Yeah, I was just kidding about the bomb lobbing thing. I get myself into trouble sometimes with my descriptions.
And he IS an addict. Maybe his employers have tested him and warned him by now, I don't know.
He won't have a lot of extra money to buy the drugs off of the internet, where he's been getting them, thanks to my attorney.
I get half of his pay a month so there's not going to be a lot of extra to go around. And Slag has her own addictions to worry about. She's an alcoholic AND into pills more now, thanks to Mr. Gray. So I don't know how much money she will be able to pony up.
I think both were counting on the collection to fund the A and their addictions.
Plus OWH is out of the house so she won't have the benefit of his substantial money wad.
He's the one who paid for her Lasik surgery back in August. She depends on his dough quite a bit. And she's a BIG spender. Even OWH said she is high maintenance. His exact words.
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If I call it will have to be into the show.
Mr. Gray hates me right now. He tried to get his petty revenge the other day with the letter.
I'm sure he will try other things. He WANTS me to react so he can hate me more.
He'll probably be really scuzzy-ugly when he comes over. I have to have major armor on. So far, so good.
As long as I don't lose it the day he's coming. It took me hours to calm down about the letter and hours afterward yet again when my attorney showed it to me.
I didn't call Mr. Gray and gripe him out. I didn't email him. I mentioned nothing about the accusations when I sent OWH the thank you note. And I didn't call OWH to question him about it, either, although I did think about doing just that.
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I wonder if he'll bring her when he comes to pick up his tuff. I don't think she'll come into the house, but she may wait in the car.
Bear down and get ready for the siege. Get yourself healed up and ready to be the ebst you, Charlotte. Mr. Gray needs to be deprived of the one person in his life that actually cares for him.
BxBF 32 years
WxGF 30 years
D-Day 9/24/07
Break-up/separation 9/30/07
Plan A 9/30/07-11/7/07
Plan B 11/8/07
A over 12/4/07
NC since 12/16/07
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I wonder if he'll bring her when he comes to pick up his tuff. I don't think she'll come into the house, but she may wait in the car. In Texas?? We are ARMED so I doubt she would try coming onto Charlotte's property.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I had to prepare myself for that possibility when I went to our old apartment for the last time. Luckily it was a mutual friend who was there instead.
Always good to plan for the worst.
BxBF 32 years
WxGF 30 years
D-Day 9/24/07
Break-up/separation 9/30/07
Plan A 9/30/07-11/7/07
Plan B 11/8/07
A over 12/4/07
NC since 12/16/07
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If the OW comes onto Charlotte's property, the OW would be the one who had to prepare for the worst, I promise ya! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I guess Mr. Gray is gone for good, taking Jonesy with him. When I go into Plan B it will be forever.
So I am preparing for that eventuality.
When I wrote to OWH in the thank you note, I asked him how he liked my attorney. I knew the two of them would hit it off.
OWH wanted his card but he was out. I had mine, all dog-eared and wrinkled, but I decided to hang onto it. It is, after all, a symbol of one of the most life-changing events in my life.
I won't keep it forever. Just for now.
OWH did tell me before we left that he wasn't going to file yet. I don't know how long he'll hold out. That was a week ago. He doesn't intend to let his wife cake eat, though.
So she'll have to make do with one man meeting her needs.
I guess if OWH files he'll want to hire my attorney. I guess that's allowed? Or maybe not. Not sure how that works. We aren't related to each other but we are related in a way.
So I will prepare myself for the thing that looks like my Jonesy. To see him one more time. I'll miss Jonesy. But I won't miss Mr. Gray.
I love you, Jonesy... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/teary.gif" alt="" />
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I wondered about that 411.
But he's not supposed to disturb my peace and prevent me from enjoying the use of our home.
So he would be violating the agreement, IMO.
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That's right. I'm not standing for that abuse. Not this chick.
He can turn around and leave if he thinks he's going to do that.
Or face the consequences.
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She'd have to sit on her ugly [censored] for an awfully long time. He wants to be here for the inventory. That's going to take forever.
Hopefully he will get bored and leave.
Last edited by Charlotte22; 11/28/07 10:12 PM.
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