Hi, SS,

No, my H does NOT get it, and likely never will.

He said some things to me a few weeks ago that resulted in my removing myself to the guest room on a permanent basis.

I am done. I am only here now due to financial and health reasons, and because I do not want to stress out my 91yo mother, who has no clue as to the situation.

We are basically living as roommates, but getting along fairly well. He is in appeasement mode (without ever acknowledging how hurtful he has been to me), but appeasement no longer works for me.

However, I am doing fine, and getting back to doing some creative things that make me happy.

If he wants to get on the Happiness Train, he is gonna have to do some major running and jumping of hurdles to get aboard.

He may not fully realize it, yet, but he has lost me. He has no clue as to what my plans are.

Oh Lady C,
I am so sorry. I keep hoping all H's will get it, but we as a whole are sometimes a pretty sorry bunch.

You (personally) sound so good that I hoped your marriage had improved. You seem really well adjusted for what is happening......... too bad he can't enjoy the benefit's of your improvements by doing his own to match.

Prayers for you.

SS

Hi SS,
I haven't posted in a long while (until the last few days that is).
The winter was busy and I was doing so well. I read here everyday, obsessively. I don't usually have anything to add and haven't really needed help with anything until H quit his winter driving job and has been home "molting", trying to figure out what job he wants next.

Kids are all but out of here. I have 3. DD22 has been gone for a few years. DS21 left but came back after some addiction issues and is now doing better...long story...hard to watch. DS18 is going to graduate next month and then off to college. Change is upon us.



No. He has improved in some but there is this stock trading thing that just drives me up the frickin wall! And he knows it. But he loves it and it makes him happy so he will do it whether I like it or not. I think it is hugely PA on his part but I can't change it. I am just not sure what I am wanting to do about it. I believe it is an addiction (he is a recovering alcoholic) and between this and my son, I am tired of dealing with everyone else's addictions.

Does he still bring home hitch hikers? Not yet. The other day he was talking to someone (business related) and we were discussing some scenarios, and H said "and I even have a place for you all to stay". (I had said I don't want anyone in the office again before this conversation.) So later I asked him why he offered and he said "I didn't say where", suggesting a place maybe for camp trailers etc. So, he likes to do that so I react and then put me in back in line. PA I think.
Oh well, such is my life right now. Like I said, change is upon us. Kids all gone.

Well, are you sorry you asked yet? Haha. You got more than you bargained for! Thanks for asking! I do appreciate it! (I was actually a little surprised you remembered me. And FF asked on another thread the other day. I'm feelin the love!!)

Hi everyone!

I'm aware of what you are al doing, but I'm VERY busy: playing tumblebugs (Mimi's fault), stuck on teh last level whic is where I was when I broke the computer a few months ago, listening to the buddhist monk, because he's like a one man comedy show and interesting, and this week I don't even have to go to my "new" job because I am attending a workshop, so at least it's a change of scenery and I don't even need an office.

On the other hand things are not going well for my friend who is a BS. Of course she hasn't stopped LBing, nor does she spend much time with her WH. He's a salesman, travels from mon to thurs and on friday goes to the office where the OW works! She has not gone with him as I advised so you can imagine that there are many reasons why this doesn't seem to be progressing as hoped. Maybe I'm no good at explaining... She doesn't seem to get it.

The only good thing is that infidelity makes my psoriasis better!

So I'm busy and doing something different, not really better but different.

CC:

You crack me up when you talk about that Buddhist Monk...

Mimi, I like him more than I do Dennis Miller!
He's funny and wise.

OK, cc--I admit it. That's a first!!! I have never, EVER heard anybody say that before. Wish there'd been some "cheaper" way to help you, though!

tl

Well t&l believe it. I've had psoriasis on one elbow since I was young, and sometimes I get it on my hands, or knees briefly, but the elbow one never actually goes away. I treat it with steroids when it gets too bad and when it's not so bad I use ordinary cream.

After WH left I was completely cured for a whole year. My mother, who hates the psoriasis, is a witness. the small tube of steroid ointment I had bought just before WH left lasted 3 years!

Now it's been back for a while but last week I noticed it had cleared up again, and that was because I was talking to my betrayed friend all week. On the one hand that's good but on the other, I don't feel that good talking about infidelity all day!

LOL..I thought the monk was CHANTING...

I just finished my very looooooong shift. We are almost out of Nebraska now, and we spent all afternoon driving through tornado watch counties but managed to just miss all the bad cells.

I'm very sleepy now, but had to say hi and see how everyone was doing.

Also, AW I forgot to congratulate YRH on the new job. Let's hear it for Her Nibs!

WHOA!!!! Neak and I were here at the same time....I was fixing to post and realized I wasn't logged in. When I got logged in, I saw that she had just posted! Cool!

I've been to Laramie, almost 6 years ago, though.


Yeah, that's an expensive skin treatment.

But, more importantly......what do you man you are playing Tumblebugs?? And, what is this about a Buddhist monk???

TUMBLEBUGS is a great COMPUTER GAME. CC is a WHIZ at it. I've put it down for a few days. There's a TUMBLEBUGS2 which she's already FINISHED. She listens to her BUDDHIST MONK while she plays...I thought the MONK was chanting..but she says that he's like a comedian(?)..she hasn't clued in where he's BROADCASTING from..her radio, TV or CD or is he in her house?...that CC..gotta luv her...

I make no claims to be a gardening whiz, but here goes.

I plant in Supersoil because it happens to be the cheapest potting soil Walmart sells.

I plant the seeds in old six-pack containers that I save anytime I buy plants.

They sit in flotillas out on the cement slab in front of the garage, and are covered with plastic drop clothes when it might frost.

Plant as early as possible, which is early Feb. here. Otherwise it takes forever for you to get any crops.

Mark your plants! This is the first time I put markers in. I got tired of mystery plants. No matter what you tell yourself, 3 months from now you will not remember what you planted in which container. I use popsicle sticks.

As to why I got started, farming is in my blood. Gardening is my hobby, my therapy, my obsession.

Plantkilling is in my blood.

Hi Rella!

GP gets scoped and dilated tomorrow. When you can't get pudding past your stricture, for Pete's sake, it's time to do something about it! I've told him several times, but no doubt he'll be surprised again tomorrow to hear he's going to the hospital. I've been reading 3 books to the kids--one adventure, one nature, one worship--and he's been coming out to listen, too. Tonight when I finished the chapter from The Colonial Twins of Virginia, where they're the only ones who know the pirates are coming, he asked, "Is that book over already?" I reassured him that there'd be another installment tomorrow night.

The Dervish had his tooth removed today. My word, that thing had a root that went clear to China!! They gave it to him in a tiny box. He's already lost and found it several times today. We'll try to save it till you get home, but no promises. The Tooth Fairy makes no guarantees on Dervish teeth! Mr. C felt that the standardized testing was pretty easy. I don't know whether to feel proud of my teaching, or dismayed at how easy the tests must have been. I guess I'll wait till I see how he scores. He told me I did well in math. At least he knew where to give due credit!!

While you're at the farm, be sure to see if Neaksis the Cow is still alive. If she's not, she will still have daughters cranking out milk for the dairy. Maybe you can get a Neak cow out of your visit this time. Pick a black one. I don't think Holsteins are very cute if they have too much white. You know how white shows stains!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tl

Well, considering what you have to deal with, my dear, I'm surprised your "therapy" garden doesn't need to be the size of Hawaii!!

tl

Mimi, the guy is on youtube, look him up: ajahn brahm. He gives weekly talks in a center in Australia and they are recorded these last few months and put on the web.

Yesterday we had to go and take a drug test. We walked up to the building, and thought at first we were at the wrong place.

Pulled up out front was a Pepperidge Farms delivery truck.

On the building was a sign something about yummy snacks.

On the window, right above the "collection site" sign was another sign that read, "Visit www.enchantedtreasures.com".



Despite the strangeness, they were very nice people, and it was not their fault we had to sit there, legs crossed for 30 and 40 minutes, respectively, dancing while we waited for our turn.

The lady at our compliance company was supposed to send the paperwork for our test. Instead, she went to lunch, and they couldn't test us without that ppw. We had each gulped down a 20-ouncer of water to make sure we could perform as soon as we got there. Who knew a half hour could be so long?


We are about 2 1/2 hrs from our unloading site, then another 2 hours to the farm.

Neak--Your GP passed out again today. He was in the shower (which was NOT what I'd told him to do), but fortunately sitting down. There was a small thump--maybe when he dropped the shower head. I don't know for sure. But he didn't answer when we called and so Neaksis picked the lock and let us in to find him slumped over with his head almost resting in his lap. He probably looked a great deal like he did for the episode you guys witnessed--little seizure-like jerks, weird breathing, pale as a snowbank, etc. He looked like he was dying, but once Neaksis got in the shower and held him up so I could try and dry him off enough to get him out of the shower, he started to wake up. When he was able to move all his limbs equally, I at least knew he hadn't had a stroke.

We finally got him out of the shower. Neaksis insists she was very traumatized by the whole thing, although she stood behind him the whole time so it's not like she saw anything shocking. Maybe it was the fact that several times it sounded like he stopped breathing. That elicited a panicked plea for reassurance a time or two! We tried to get your dad, hoping he was at her house, but he was in Oakdale, so we just did it ourselves. Right now he's in bed, and feeling enough improved to complain about not being fully dried off before he was dressed!! I am still taking him in for his procedure, since I'm sure he fainted because he's so weak from not being able to eat much of anything for the last 3 wks. And until we get his stricture opened up, it's not going to improve, either. So we're going. Period.

Not the best morning. But on the plus side, he's still alive and kicking up a fuss...

tl