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Minding my own business today on my way back from the bank and as I'm waiting at the light to turn..who should appear in my rearview mirror but a guy I grew up with and used to date....however so briefly. I waved at him and continued to turn toward my store..he follows me and pulls up to my car. We talk for a few minutes and he tells me to call his house phone when I get inside so he'd have my number on caller ID. So that's what I do....lo and behold 20 minutes later he calls me back to get my home and cell number also. LOL We made plans to hang out this weekend. Our boys (his 15/mine 17) are friends so they will be hanging with us. Something to look forward to. Ronda
Me, 43 DS18, DD12 Divorce final May 10, 2007
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LIke everyone says.....when you least expect it.....
Have fun!
Me - far from a perfect person - but trying to improve all the time
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Thanks!! If the weather cooperates we'll probably just sit out on the patio, cook dinner on the grill and the boys will ride 4 wheelers and play x-box 360 all day. We are planning a date to the casino next. He's excited about the buffet and I'm excited about the slots...LOL
Me, 43 DS18, DD12 Divorce final May 10, 2007
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Ronda,
I am very happy for you. And it is true, when you least expect it, someone will walk into your life.
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Thanks Keith....
We'll see how it goes. He wanted me to call him last night but I didn't want to seem too eager so I'll call him tonight instead.
Me, 43 DS18, DD12 Divorce final May 10, 2007
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So do tell!!!! How did things go?
Dawn
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Well.... we went up to his house around 6pm...hung out for a few hours. My son ended up camping overnight with his son. He brought my son home this afternoon. Nothing romantic happened...lots of conversation and laughs. Just taking it slow.
Thanks for asking Dawn!!
Ronda
Me, 43 DS18, DD12 Divorce final May 10, 2007
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what's he like rhonda?
divorced too?
FBH, 39 Now a primary custody dad New life began June 2008
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yes he's divorced also......about a year I went to elementary school with him and lost contact...then our boys played little league baseball together a few years ago. He came over for a little bit saturday night and then invited us up to his place sunday for a campfire in his backyard....well until the clouds opened up and a thunderstorm rolled in. He works in a steelmill 4 days 6pm-6am and then has 4 days off..so I usually don't hear from him until he has the days off...which will be Thursday.....I think My daughter made the comment to me that I should marry him...LOL I asked her why and she said because he's funny...ohhh If it were only that simple... Thanks for asking Charlie.....how's thing going for you?
Me, 43 DS18, DD12 Divorce final May 10, 2007
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Sometimes our kids see things clearer than us.
A good friend with 4 kids worked with a nice man - and everyone at work knew all about her D issues. He came over to help her with something at the house one day, and her daughter (about 4) told him "my mom needs a date".
I think he was just waiting for an opening and finally they went out. Well, they've been married over 10 years now, and he's been a wonderful husband to her, and father to her children and put up with alot of BS. And she still gushes when she talks about him, as do the now college age children (despite their teenage years). He is Dad to these kids.
This friend has been a beacon to me through all of my D issues, present and past, and seeing this family thrive has been a shining example to me. And they are a religious family too. My children know the family and share in their accomplishments too.
So, trust in your children's opinions. Perhaps you will be an inspiration to us here.
It was a marriage that never really started. H: Conflict Avoider, NPD No communication skills (Confirmed by MC) Me: Enabler Sep'd 12/01, D'd 08/03. My joys and the light of my life: DD 11, DD 9 *Approach life and situations from the point of love - not from fear.*
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I just got to jump in on this one about the kids!!!
My daughters have picked out who it is that I am to marry and have for sometime!!! We've never dated, and are very good friends. His mom asked why her son and I didn't date even. We will see!!!!
I did get my oldest daughter about a month ago, it was 1:30 in the morning where she was and so I texted her "I am getting married!!!" about half an hour later I got "are you drunk?" After her calling her younger sister and going "where is mom and what is she doing?" I got back, "So who are you marrying?" and I said "Who do you suppose?" I had her going good!!!
Kids got to love them!!!!
Dawn
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Sorry, but I'm gonna pour some cold water on this... I think that the kids should be a factor in considering whom to date or perhaps marry, but a very small factor at most.
For one thing, they may be projecting their desire to have a "whole family" again into thinking that "somebody, anybody" will do... They may also want to protect their parent from being lonely, so they figure that someone is better than noone. My daughter asked me a number of times if I feel lonely alone, and it took her a while to finally understand that I truly was happy on my own.
Also, kids may well like someone who is great for them but bad for you. They have different interests in and interactions with the person you are dating. A person may be great to them as a "GF to my dad", but terrible as a GF to me. I have dated some women whom the kids really really liked, but who I knew would be a disaster as a mate for me.
Anyway, this is probably more or less obvious, and of course it is true that it's important (or at least helpful) if the kids like the person you are dating - but I would be hesistant to say "let the kids pick your mate".
AGG
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Sorry, but I'm gonna pour some cold water on this... I think that the kids should be a factor in considering whom to date or perhaps marry, but a very small factor at most.
For one thing, they may be projecting their desire to have a "whole family" again into thinking that "somebody, anybody" will do... They may also want to protect their parent from being lonely, so they figure that someone is better than noone. My daughter asked me a number of times if I feel lonely alone, and it took her a while to finally understand that I truly was happy on my own.
Also, kids may well like someone who is great for them but bad for you. They have different interests in and interactions with the person you are dating. A person may be great to them as a "GF to my dad", but terrible as a GF to me. I have dated some women whom the kids really really liked, but who I knew would be a disaster as a mate for me.
Anyway, this is probably more or less obvious, and of course it is true that it's important (or at least helpful) if the kids like the person you are dating - but I would be hesistant to say "let the kids pick your mate".
AGG Yes. That. All of that. Good post.
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Still occasionally seeing "M". Probably hang out this weekend. He wanted to go to the Indian Reservation Casino last weekend but I didn't feel like it.
Me, 43 DS18, DD12 Divorce final May 10, 2007
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Good for you to listen to what you do or do not want to do - for whatever reason.
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Thats something new for me since the divorce....to do things when I want to and not because I don't want to disappoint anyone.
Me, 43 DS18, DD12 Divorce final May 10, 2007
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Update: I have decided to just be friends with M. He has too many issues/drama with his EX. He also drinks too much for my liking. He called me last night to tell me his EX told him that she was sorry and regrets divorcing him. I have told him from the beginning (sometimes jokingly) that he's going to take her back and they are going to live happily ever after...I told him that again last night. He denies it...but I know it will happen. My girls at work are convinced Prince Charming will come into our store and sweep me off my feet someday....they make me laugh!
Me, 43 DS18, DD12 Divorce final May 10, 2007
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yea but it's good that you aren't jumping into the pool sotospeak anyway
FBH, 39 Now a primary custody dad New life began June 2008
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I'm in no hurry and if "the one" never shows that's okay too...
Me, 43 DS18, DD12 Divorce final May 10, 2007
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