So, I was going through some junk yesterday and sorting things to take to the dump.

Most of it was stuff accumulated by XH and myself in our 9 years together. I also came across our photos.

I want to throw them out, but at the same time, it bugs me. I don't want to keep them, because there will come a time when I have kids, and then have to explain that mommy once had another life and another husband, etc.

What did you all do?

I think I will sort through them and throw away all photos of XH. I don't really care to look at his ugly mug again. :P

Give the ones of him to him or to his parents?

I gave my x a lot of the photos of just him or him with the children.....Now, I got double prints for several years so there were LOTS of them.

Well, any photos of him have me in them. so I have my doubts he would care to have them. OW would LOVE to have framed photos of me around, I am sure!

As for his parents... they have disappeared. Abandoned their home and vanished. I actually had someone come ask me today what happened to them, because they just up and left town. I have no clue though, so it doesn't really bother me all that much.

My XW gave me no photos at all.

Not a single one.

There were a bunch from a vacation we took to Parrot Jungle that I wanted, but she claimed she didn't know what I was talking about and lied straight to the judge's face.

I hate her more and more with each passing day.

In this day and age I dunno why you couldn't have electronic copies. She should at least be willing to scan them in, or let you do that.

We haven't even so much as spoken since she threw me out almost 2 years ago. We didn't even speak when in front of the judge.

There is absolutely no chance of any civil communication.

I have all the photos but one that I gave him of his entire family (mom, dad and brothers). He left the house for the OW....he doesn't deserve anything and hasn't asked for any of them.

I'm sorry I can't offer much advice as this is a very sore subject with me.....

For over 10 years I lovingly put the best of the photos in albums - there were pictures of all our family - friends, friends' kids, pets etc. our vacations, house , parties etc. Shortly after our separating, he threw out all of the photo albums. Or should I say he doesn't know what happened to the photo albums - it's a big mystery.

That just one of many things he's never "owned up to".

I should have know better - because when he was divorced from his second wife he throw out all of her stuff - including some very important letters from her father - the only communication she ever had with him.

What a jerk! The past few months I am more and more comfortable with the divorce and my future without him.

Funny, in my preparations for selling the house, I came across some more photos on the back of a shelf from Wstbx's brother's wedding where the guys were all in kilts. I'm giving these to DS. There are some more in albums in the basement - haven't decided what to do about them yet. Fortunately, because Wstbx decided to be a reclusive hermit upon saying "I do", there are tons of pictures from places he never went with us. If he did go, he's generally taking the pictures so he isn't in that many.

As for the wedding photos, he actually electronically inserted OW's face on top of mine so he now has "their" wedding photo on display in their home. He also fought hard for a bunch of wedding gift items we had in the house. Basically, he was putting together his new "marriage" as if he never had the old one. I'm not sure what brand of sickness this is, but it's something.

And the chick goes for that?

toss them. Your kids will have very little interest that you were married before. I also don't think it would be fair to your new husband and father of your children for you to be running through photo albums with your ex husband in there...just so the kids can see.


Ditch em.

I would toss them as well.

The ONLY reason I even kept my wedding album was for my children. It is in a box stored away.

Any other pix I had of my exh or his family, I promptly returned to him. In fact,when we moved I found more, and gave them all to him in a bag.

You have no children with him and no use for the pix. Why keep them laying around?

Pariah, I'll tell ya, I can symapthize with that anger you feel. No matter how hard I try, I still have it in me for a few people, my exh included. It stinks carrying that around doesn't it? I hate it and really wish I could let it go. With us sharing children though, I do have to communicate with him at times.

Was so much better when ow wasn't in the picture. Now that she is back in it, he is impossible to deal with.

(sorry to t/j... just wanted to share that with pariah)

My H solved all those problems. He shreeded out wedding pictures and several of my favorite items that he had given me. It made me feel that if this doesn't work out i.e. counseling, recovery, whatever. Now I am clean and will not relive it later by looking at them. However the first thing our marriage couselor wanted us to do was to look over the pictures as a healing process. Well, that was out!

I'd keep them..they are a part of your life history. If not all of them. At least one. You don't have to display it. And I also wouldn't hide the fact from any future children or husband(s) that you had a previous marriage. Why have secrets and make it a mystery?

I have kept both wedding albums not only for my children but for myself. It's a part of me and who I am.

Just my opinion

Ronda