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oops I pressed the submit button by mistake!!

....on the wall was written WE REBUILD AND RESTORE...many times God speaks to me in different ways...I just know its Him....its difficult to explain without sounding crazy!

Still, I know you will understand this,others might not.



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Hope,

Good morning, at least it is here lol. God does speak to me in different ways also. Although I haven't recieved any rhema verses. I need to read my bible more that is a place where I am lacking lately. I pray for a rhema. Lately I really need to hear God because of everything going on, He has been quiet lately.

You don't sound crazy to me, because some of the things I have seen and heard. There was one day in December that I was at the end of my rope ad I prayed and cried God I'm not sure if this is Your will or mine if this is what You want me to do then let my WH tell me I smell nice. It was the most absurb thing I could think of because I was so ready to give up on my stand. I felt defeated. My DS16 had a hockey game out of town and it was a late one. WH did come over to talk to me a few times during the game which doesn't happen very often. After the game I was waiting at the high school for my son to get ther it was almost midnight and my WH called me made small talk and then all of sudden he said don't take this wrong but you smelled nice tonight. I nearly dropped the phone and just thanked him.

Sometimes God speaks to me thru license plates on other vehicles. I have seen HISPLAN, LQQK2HM. Now I'm sounding crazy. I'm struggling again so that's why I'm fasting more.

I wish I could listen to RMM on my computer at home but it doesn't work for some reason. I do listen to a worship radio staion locally. They are also available on line.
They are certain songs that God speaks to me Chris Tomlin's Amazing Grace is main one. '' My God has promised good to me''.

Still

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Hi Still,

I did go directly to that site on the questions and answers.

There is a question number six previously answered handling going back to a person who was married to someone else.

As I understand it, if two Christians marry then the oath is binding before God. If a Christian marries a non Christian, the partner is sanctified that the children is holy.

If the non Christian partner leaves, the Christian is instructed to let them go. (1Cor7:15)

Still, by God grace, your husband is attending church. Your marriage falls under where two Christians marry.

Hopenpray has fasted and hoped for an answer to her problems. Maybe this is the answer that is not quite ready for her ears.

Hope, I don't like to dump on folks head because of their dreams. I know that I probably would do no better.

But test my words...


But I, being poor, have only my dreams; I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams -Yeats
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Good morning Imagine,

Thank you for checking out the website. I think you are more versed in the bible than I am, although I have been a christian my whole life it is just the past year or so that I have really been looking to the bible for answers. I will look more into the books I have from them because I know they have addressed the question about one spouse being a believer and the other not.

Do you believe that God can put circumstances in our way to nudge us to turn to Him even if we never believed in Him? Our God is a mighty God and can do the impossible. At least what seems impossible to us. I think Hope's WH needs to hit bottom so there is no where but Up to look, and I pray that He will see the light of God's love.

Imagine perhaps Hope's situation is similar to Hosea. IDK, just a thought. I pray Hosea frequently.
OW/WH will be surrounded by thornbushes. They will be walled in and shall not find they way. They will search but shall not find. They will chase their lovers but not catch them. Then they will say I shall go back to BS for as at first for I was better off than I am now.

Keep praying for us, that we have wisdom to discern what God is trying to tell us. All I know is everytime I think it is my will more than God's Will, and I want to give up He sends me my answer.

Still

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God did not give up on non-believers in the bible.....look how he used Paul? why then should we give up on non-believers?

Christ was drawn to the unbelievers, the down and outs.....

I take this as an arrogent attitude...as if non-believers are beneath us....and we are better then them...we are ALL SINNERS...

Its this attitude that turns non-believers away from Christianity...we are ALL GOD'S CHILDREN..he loves us all equally ....

Sorry Imagine but I don't agree with you....as a matter of interest do you only associate with Christians in your daily life?

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Hi Hope,

How are you doing today? Don't know why but I'm struggling.

Still

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After the game I was waiting at the high school for my son to get ther it was almost midnight and my WH called me made small talk and then all of sudden he said don't take this wrong but you smelled nice tonight. I nearly dropped the phone and just thanked him.

Wow! That's very cool. I love it when there is positive confirmation that your prayers are heard.


Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
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“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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Still, I'm having a good day thanks...I'm at work,about to leave,its 10pm here..

I think we were meant to connect here...maybe to keep each other strong in our stand together....
I have been praying and feeling strong this last week...

I will chat later when I get home (1 hour time!)if my son is not on the computer!....

Still, pray for a wall of protection around yourself and put on the whole armour of God....


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Hope,

Yes I think we were meant to connect here and to keep each other strong in our stand. It's nice to have someone to share this with because it's not a very popular action. Not very understood.

I will pray for a wall of protection around me and my family. Although still praying for hedges of thorns around exWH and OW.

Still


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Originally Posted by hopenpray
God did not give up on non-believers in the bible.....look how he used Paul? why then should we give up on non-believers?

Christ was drawn to the unbelievers, the down and outs.....

I take this as an arrogent attitude...as if non-believers are beneath us....and we are better then them...we are ALL SINNERS...

Its this attitude that turns non-believers away from Christianity...we are ALL GOD'S CHILDREN..he loves us all equally ....

Sorry Imagine but I don't agree with you....as a matter of interest do you only associate with Christians in your daily life?

Hope,

You and I were born unbelievers.

I'm sure that I am least in his kingdom. I know that as a Christian I have a foot shaped mouth. I desire that truth become evident to those that need it.

You know that there are two fathers:
1. The father of life to those that have confessed their brokenness upholding God's law.
2. The father of lies who supports those that do not recognise God's authority in their lives.

Why would I bring you such distressing news: I am telling you that the body of your husband is dead. I do not tell you that he is ill and can get better.

God may in his grace restore your husband to a life of service to Him. Yet he cannot come back to you, this would be a sin of adultery on both of your parts.

I have angered you though I strive to shield you from longer distress. I shall lurk on this forum but not contribute without your approval.

I wish the truth of a relationship with God be appreciated by xH and OW. May God grant you the peace that Kickme has demonstrated on the forum "Christian: How do you handle an OM?"

God bless you!



But I, being poor, have only my dreams; I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams -Yeats
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God may in his grace restore your husband to a life of service to Him. Yet he cannot come back to you, this would be a sin of adultery on both of your parts.

I disagree with this.

Her husband's second marriage is not a biblical marriage (recognized by God) because it was born of adultery.

Hope is certainly free to remarry because her husband divorced her AND he committed adultery. If her husband had divorced her for any other reason and had not committed adultery, then she wouldn't be free to remarry.

Additionally, if her husband were to truly repent, divorce his new "wife" (because man's law requires it), Hope's marriage COULD be restored in the eyes of God.


Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
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“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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Hope,

Sorry that I've not posted to you before. I have read most of your thread and tonight I will read it all again.

Please if you get the time read some of mine. I would like to share with you what God is doing for me and my DS.

Just let me know if I can help in any way.....k?

Maybe read today's post under "Christians how to deal with OM" or something like that.


Me 48 XWAW 42 M 18Y
D day 9/14/08
Plan A&B for months
One false R
DS12 (my life)
DD23
D Final 5-14-09

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PM,

ITA, when I read what Imagine had written I must admit it got my hackles up. To say that it would be adultry in God's eyes just floored me. The M her ex is in now is not a marriage that is recognised by God.

Still

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Yesterday was my birthday...and my MIL phoned me!!!She has contacted me once in the last 2 years.....

I could hear that it was hard for her...she basically said that it was difficult to not take sides and that now that decisions had been made we can move on???

She asked me if I had met someone yet?? only been divorced 2 months....BTW she had an affair and married the OW 20 years ago...

It was a 5 min conversation but I was calm and let her know that I was happy and my family and friends were always around me..etc.

She gave me her new phone no. and said we should keep in contact.
Her daughter had sent her and my XH(HER BROTHER)an email in Jan...saying how hurt she was that no one told her about the wedding and that she thought her mom was terrible not to have contacted me all this time..especially as we were close..27 yrs is a long time.
She has not contacted her own daughter since the email but phones me!!XH hasn't replied to her email either....and they were VERY close....

XH has really stuffed up his relationship with his family and old friends that are no more....



I let her daughter know today and she was glad that her mom phoned me.I hope she will make contact with her daughter now...

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Hope,

Happy Belated B-day, I'm sure you're in bed by now.

I'm sure it was hard for your MIL to call, take it for what it is. Maybe an olive branch, then again maybe not. It also must of been hard to take the call especially if she hasn't contacted you at all through out this. I'm sure you were gracious and a goddess and the shined through the phone call.

Just wanted to let you know I had a very exciting weekend.... I read just about your whole thread. Now don't be jealous that I lead this very exciting life lol. I think I'm going through alot of what you were going through last year. About questioning my stand and such.

Still


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crumbs,I hope my posts were of some help...I was in a bad way emotionally a lot of the time.I hope that you can gain some help from the advice I was given back then...

Today my SIL phoned me to say that her mom had phoned her to make amends.She is very into the new age thing and said she doesn't want to carry this negative energy into another lifetime puke
So self-centred,basically thinking of herself first.Anyway my SIL has learnt to deal with her mom and basically she was glad that she had phoned....me too.I will phone my MIL in a few weeks time to chat and keep up the contact....we were good friends before all this....

A long story short,SIL said that she had met up with an old school friend of hers and XH on facebook.After filling him in on XH and affair etc,he knows OW!He said she was a "s#$t stirrer" and causes trouble...very interesting!!

I am feeling good today...I have been praying for reconciliation in XH's family and God has answered my prayers....another sign that He is listening to my cries for help....

Still,keep on keeping on...I know its hard...I'm here for you...



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Why do they continue to blame/point fingers at us????

Yesterday XH bought DS19 back home after he spent the weekend between XH and his gf.DS19's GF came for the ride as she lives 2 roads away from XH.DS16 was going back with XH to spend his week with his dad.Normally I don't venture outside when XH is around but because the GF was here,I showed my face.I was standing at the frontdoor,not 2 metres away from XH,who was playing with our new puppy..Not once did he acknowledge that I was there,he just kept focusing on the puppy.

I eventually greeted and I could see he looked very uncomfortable.I mentioned that his mom had phoned me on my B'day to apologize for avoiding me...he seemed surprised.He didn't acknowledge my b'day either.Anyway,he looked miserable and his face was drawn...he looked older.

Today he text me saying DS19 has a Dr.s appointment tomorrow and he can't take him.Long story short...because of DS19's accident 2 years ago he can claim compensation for the motor vehicle association....and our lawyer sets up appointments with different Doc's who write up reports about DS19's injuries.XH has been liasing with the lawyer and taking DS19 to the appointments.DS19 only told me about this appointment Sunday night.

I text XH that I can't take him and that he must reschedule for a time that suits him.XH texts me that "I haven't changed" and that "I don't understand,he has a business to run and they only have 1 car between them and they have kids to fetch from school"
I replied "you don't understand, you must take DS19 or reschedule"
He tried to phone me on my cell but I didn't reply cos I knew he would just yell at me.He text me the following"u r still the same person and thx 4 not answering,you're a sad,sad individual...sticking your head in the sand doesn't make things go away.have a great day and I hope all goes well tomorrow at the doc.."
I reiterated via text that I couldn't make the appointment.
XH reply "I am being childish as usual and I must put my personal feelings aside and do whats best for our child.(like his affair??
sort it out or call me.."

The few times we have had words he always says"you haven't changed' keep in mind that I do my hardest not to LB.
Its as if he just wants to accuse me for any little thing,its crazy....

I did text him asking"why he always says I haven't changed and what difference does it make to him as he is sadly no longer part of my life...."I told him I wasn't going to get into a mud-slinging match with him..no reply

I am sick of his nonsense. In the very few interactions I have had with him, he is miserable,awkward,accusing,blaming me for anything silly.I give him no reason to attack me.

I know I looked like a GODDESS yesterday and my boys say I look younger now!!lol
The good thing now is that I don't get upset like I used to cos I know his talking puke

If he's so happy with his life why does he attack me....its like I'm his sounding board....takes it out on me...


DS19 says he is stressing about money.....

just venting....

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