Psalm 29:23

A man's pride will bring him low, But a humble spirit will obtain honor.

I love you G-d. I for my H that your will can work in his life and that your will continues to work in my life and I keep becoming the woman you always envisioned for me.

G-d you have worked so hard in me these past two years, I for the strength to remember the lessons and keep them dear to my heart so that our hard work was for naught.

Please take care of my H and know how deeply I love him and hope that it's your will to reunite us as man and wife.

And this is for me....

G-d will make a way,
Where there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me
He will be my guide
Hold me closely to His side
With love and strength for each new day
He will make a way, He will make a way.

By a roadway in the wilderness, He'll lead me
And rivers in the desert will I see
Heaven and earth will fade
But His Word will still remain
He will do something new today.

G-d will make a way,
Where there seems to be no way
He works in ways we cannot see
He will make a way for me
He will be my guide
Hold me closely to His side
With love and strength for each new day
He will make a way, He will make a way.

I love you G-d....

Queenie,

Looks like we need to find Mimi...

If you keep dealing with him and his stuff before he has solved his own problems you will have nothing to give if he does come around. You are raising your expectations instead of your standards.

In fact you are lowering your standards in order to raise your expectations.

Look at this pattern...

• You hear from him indirectly.
  
• You get your hopes up.
  
• You examine what is happening.
  
• You remember what has already happened.
  
• You begin to realize that he isn't ready yet.
  
• You begin to realize he might never be ready.
  
• Your hopes crash.
  
• Your faith is shaken.
  
• You fall apart.
  
• You pull it together...
  
• And go on.
  

Until the next drama you get caught up in...

When David decided to bring the Ark of the Covenant to Jerusalem he called a meeting. He asked the opinions of all the leaders of the nation. They formulated a plan to load the Ark onto a cart and haul it to the city.

But God had already given them instructions on moving the Ark. They did after all, carry it with them for 40 years of wandering in the wilderness. Those directions were very specific right down to the kind of wood to use for the poles that were to be run through the rings on the sides. Even the process for selecting who would carry it was known to them.

But they were all in a hurry. Doing it the way God wanted them to would take time. They would have to find the right kind of wood, make the poles, find the Levites, wait for them to purify themselves...

It would just take so much longer than what they had the patience for. David had just conquered Jerusalem and made it his capitol. This celebration could solidify the nation and ensure David's family as leaders forever. The time to strike was now and waiting for God would cause them to lose the advantage...

What were they thinking?

It cost a man his life!

List all the reasons you want to hurry this up. Write down all the ideas you have as to why just letting God deal with him isn't good enough. Explain why you keep getting involved in the drama before He is done with WH...

Then read Joshua 1:5, Joshua 1:9, Jer 29:11, Psalm 5:11-12, Psalm 125:1-2, Psalm 127:1, Psalm 130:5-7...

Need more?

What plans will you come up to add to God's plan?

Or what about God's plan is not right for you?

God will work on your WH, Queenie.
And He is trying to work on you.
He isn't done with either of you yet...



OK. Putting the :twobyfour: back in the box now...



Let me know if you need my commentary on this... :RollieEyes:

Mark

:twobyfour:Queenie, LISTEN TO MARK!!!! :twobyfour:

Has he ever steered you wrong?

You are being co-dependent. You are succombing to your addiction to this toxic relationship. :twobyfour:

What has your poswh done to show YOU that he has changed one iota? NOTHING!!!

Now, do you understand what we are trying to tell you? :twobyfour: :MrEEk:

Do we need to put out an APB for MIMI? Or, are you smart enough to realize that God loves you too much for you to settle for this man?

Give him up! LET HIM GO!!! :twobyfour: :twobyfour: :twobyfour: :twobyfour:

Focus on you. Right now you are redirecting your energies. Until you are both broken and healed, there is no chance of ever having a decent marriage with poswh! Do you get my drift.

Sorry, I just don't have the energy to be nice about this. Cut him loose! He doesn't deserve you. You don't deserve that poswh! :twobyfour:

Trust me, peace by yourself is better than living with someone who doesn't demonstrate any love or concern for you. LOTS BETTER!

Queenie! SNAP OUT OF IT!!! :twobyfour: :twobyfour: :twobyfour:

No Mark has NEVER steered me wrong.

I get it. I honestly get it. I have learned that I initially react to stuff on want it out of me to get rid of it, then I start to put into practice what I have learned about myself and what I deserve. I'm not going to him, I'm pushing thoughts of him out of my head and moving on with my life.

Thank you both. But I get this. I honestly get it. I came to the same conclusions in my morning prayers on how I was being the same woman as before. Trying to do something. I deserve what G-d has planned for me.

YOU ARE RIGHT.....

I AM......

I'm not going back to that place. In fact, I'm actually pretty sick and tired of his crap. Not done, but very close. I do deserve better and well I don't even want to talk about him and his lack of whatever...

So... onto more important things. It's gorgeous today, I'm getting ready to celebrate my birthday tomorrow, AND meet LIL and FLICK on Sunday. What a beautiful start to the weekend.

I do HEAR and UNDERSTAND. I just got lost for a little while, well a few hours. I will go read what you suggest Mark too.

And take a BOTTLE of aspirin thank you very much.

If you don't snap out of it, we'll get Flick to bonk you in the head with a brick tossed from the top of the tower! :twobyfour:

MORE TYLENOL. I'm BUYING STOCK....

I'M OUT OF IT.....

I'M OUT OF IT....

I'M OUT OF IT......

Queenie,I feel for you....you've stuck this rollercoaster out for sooo long, you CAN wait a little longer...for WH to defog!!!

How long exactly did the affair last?

Queenie, my computer is down at home so while I'm here at work, I wish you a HAPPY,HAPPY birthday for tomorrow!!

Go ahead and spoil yourself...GODDESS style!!!

Hope, you are right I have stuck this out for so long. Let's just stop thinking or talking about him.

I have more important stuff to deal with....

My YS just failed the math test that he worked so hard for. Which means that he probably won't be able to play because of his grades. However, it's really his fault in the end because he didn't give a rip for so long and now he is reaping the consequences of his choices.

Oh an here is comes, his text, i'm stupid and it's hopeless so I may as well quit lacrosse cause I'm never gonna get the grades. :twobyfour: :twobyfour:

He is JUST LIKE his FATHER.... I made a mistake and I can't live with it the rest of my life.



I'm giving him a dose of truth and it's not making him happy. His response, are you kidding me, I've tried and tried.

No YS, you tried when its convenient, not every day and you certainly didn't try your hardest, so go ahead feel sorry for yourself and give up. Or you can see what kind of young man you are and fight through this.

OMG...... I get to deal with the son on the very SAME THING the WH is dealing with. Why does it seem so clear when it's my son.

G-d is certainly working in my life.

Hi Queenie,

WS who?


Now..this I get.

Enjoy.

Thank you so much Luna, I plan to...

I want to whip that boy of mine. :twobyfour:

His attitude make me

hey, can we get 'em together and have a total "Mama whippin' the boys" party? Or, could we synchronise our watches and do it simultaneously?

I'm IN....

Two things you should be very careful praying for:

1) That God would allow our faith to be tested.
2) That God would teach us patience.

He’s only too happy to bring about both…

And yet, it is by having our faith tested that our faith grows and by God making us wait for what He has for us that we become patient.

The most dangerous time in our lives is right after we have had a victory. We lose our focus on what God has done for us and refocus on what we have accomplished. It’s what happened after the victory at Jericho. One man tried to call what God said was His “spoils of war” and claimed a right to them. For that he paid with his life.

But all of Israel sinned when they went against Ai, and 3 dozen paid with their lives for that sin. Instead of focusing on what God had done, they began to believe that THEY had won the battle. “We don’t need everyone” they said. “WE can win this battle with but a few men” & “Look what WE did to Jericho.”

And once they had been defeated, they all lamented their own suffering. “Woe is me...” They began to blame God for the loss. “Why did you ever bring this people across the Jordan to deliver us into the hands of the Amorites to destroy us? If only we had been content to stay on the other side of the Jordan!” They begged God to remove the consequences of their sin. They did what repentant sinners do, (threw themselves down before God, sprinkled dust on their heads, cried out to God) but had not owned the sin they had committed. They blamed it on God. They tried to take credit for the victory at Jericho and yet did not accept the consequences for their own sin.

And this is how you will know for certain when your WH is really ready to return and is truly repentant, Queenie. He will say “I have sinned.” He will not blame or even try to blame you, or God, or Crack-Ho, or his job, or his life, or booze, or drugs…He will OWN the choices he has made and show sorrow for them. He will be sorry and not “sorry, but…”

He might never be at that place since most never reach it. But remember that it was God that brought you this far and it was God that has taken care of you so far and it was God that has given YOU the victories you have enjoyed. Let Him finish what He started. Don’t make the mistake of trying to take ownership of what He has done in your life. You didn’t do it without Him and in fact it was really Him who did it all.

Let Him complete His work and stay out of His way...

Stand back, watch and be amazed.

Mark

Ok, so I just said everything to my son that I have wanted to say to WH.

And it felt SO GOOD...

I so get what you said Mark.... Thank you....

If there has been any inkling of taking the credit from G-d I truly apologize. I don't for one second take the credit of what he has created in me. I'm ashamed to even think that I would have given you that idea.

JT planted in me what I could do with the love for my H. Give it to G-d and just understand that it's there and let G-d have it to hold and continue on the path that G-d desires for me.

I have one more child to somehow raise to manhood and that's all I can be concerned with. My H is a MAN. Let him get his own a$$ out of this mess or NOT.

I'm absolutely in awe of how G-d places the lessons in front of me.

Ok, let's step about the WH stuff. He is in G-ds hands... Nothign I can do there.

My job of raising my son is what's important. Clearly I am dealing with the same issues of self pity, entitlment, etc.

What is my role as his mother? Do I take the same approach and give him to G-d?

I don't want to mess this up because it's at a crossroads of some kind.

Mark, Pretty, Bellevue, Miriam, White Russian - Shabbat Shalom

Happy Weekend everyone....

Shabbat Shalom, Queenie.

And what I was trying to say was that when we try to add to what God is doing, when we try to do things ourselves, we are really trying to take ownership of what is really His. If we give it to Him, it is His problem and we should just let Him take care of it.

When Yeshua was asked about a group of people who had been killed when a tower had collapsed on them, he responded by asking "Do you think these men died because they were greater sinners than all the rest? I tell you no. But unless you repent, you too will perish."

The implication is the same as I was stating to you regarding Esther. The book of Ester does not mention the Name of God even one time, and yet it was because she was focused on her own relationship with God and His people as first priority that she was in a position to save them from destruction.

The same has to apply to you, Queenie. Your focus has to remain on God and not on WH or what he is doing or not doing or what his status is before God right now. Any time you get caught up in wondering about what he is doing you are allowing yourself to worry about what God will do or not do. Just trust Him to do what is BEST!

We all do it, Queenie. We say we are leaving it in God's hands, we come before Him and dump out our burdens and our troubles and ask Him to take them from us. But then we pick them up and put them back onto ourselves and He just won't chase us down to take them away from us.

If the day comes that WH is really broken and is ready to submit his life to God, then and only then can he be trusted. And if that day comes, YOU must be in that place as well because neither of you can save the other in your own strength.

And since you have no control over WH, you can only submit your own life to God and let God worry about your WH.

Now from a purely emotional standpoint, look at the events of the last few days. DD sent him an email. He replied. You read the reply. You focused only briefly on what it all might mean and then you again questioned what was going on with this latest round of email contact between them. You worried about what he was thinking, why he might be close to being ready to submit to God. You were thinking about him and your emotions began to well up inside you. You recovered quickly, but even at that it took a toll on you. If he ever is ready to come home you need to be ready to take him back and every time you get caught up in his life as long as he is wayward, your love for him dies a little more. A few more times and even if he is ready to come home, you will not want him any more.

Keep focused on the job of Queenie getting stronger and let God worry about WH.

Gotta run...

Mark