I am trying to stay busy to manage the experience.

What has been the best thing about your plan B?

So far, my best thing is doing things I want to without worrying about disrespectful judgements of them. I never realized how in the shadow of those judgements I was living. For over 20 years. Wow.

I have also learned to reach out to people and really connect to them and to support others in tough times, more than I ever did before.

Who wants to share their positive experiences in B?

I'm feeling very positive lately so I'd love to share!

My positive experiences in B: (in no particular order)
1. Peace in my life
2. Peace in my home
3. Working through my issues and understanding how I ended up living in such pain for so long.
3. Learning to have boundaries.
4. Learning where I needed to improve as a parent and fixing it.
5. Being emotionally present for my DD and falling madly in love with her!
6. Learning who I am and liking me.
7. Learning who I am in Christ.
8. Creating a relationship with Christ like I've never had before.
9. Realizing that I couldn't really SEE people, family and friends because of MY pain.
10. Learning to LOVE!
11. Learning to cherish my character and integrity and protect them for life!
12. Knowing for sure that I can trust Christ with anything.
13. Finding real joy.
14. Discovering the difference between happiness and joy.
15. Wake up smiling!
16. Letting go of the burden of trying to change my WH.
17. Letting go of the desire to know what he is doing and with who.
18. Not fearing the future as a single mom.
19. Not fearing the future.
20. Working on letting go of anger and resentment (a huge work in process)
21. Beginning to think about working on forgiveness (it's only a thought as this point :-)
22. Looking forward to whatever the good Lord has in store for me!
23. Not worrying so much.
24. Understand that there are some REALLY broken people in this world and learning that I cannot change them.
25. Learning to accept the fact that some people will choose to remain broken.
26. Learning to accept the fact the the OW (2?) are not worth my time despising them. I outshine them! They've never had one over on me!
27. Accepting the Word of God as the basis of my conduct.
28. Learning to love life!

Its been peaceful with just my DS and I living at home and no WH....These are some of the things I enjoy about being in Plan B....

I can let the laundry pile up sometimes and there is no one to complain....

I am not as anal about the house being clean (no one to come home and say "what did you do all day?") and DS and I can play instead...

DS loves my "smelly" candles....

The Christmas tree was up all year, that would have not happened if WH was here...and DS and I enjoyed it being up all year too.

DS loves everything I cook, sometimes I can even just have mac and cheese (oh God forbid, no meat at dinnertime) and no WH to complain...

I have a good schedule going for DS and I...no WH to come home late and screw it up...

I dont have to watch Survivorman or Mythbusters...and I can watch House....and leave the tv on all nite if I want...

Can watch any movie I want too (well of course I see a lot of kids movies with DS) but when I am alone no Steven Segal or Bruce Willis movies to torture myself through.

Dont have to worry about WH coming home late or not at the time he promised DS or I...no dissapointments anymore...he is not here.

No one here to complain about the way I chew gum, the way I brush my teeth, the way I do laundry, the way I cook, the way I clean, The way I walk...etc.(of course this all happened when he was seeing OW and I wasnt aware of it yet)

DS loves me just the way I am and I feel closer to him then ever, we have a lot of nerf gun fights, game nites, indoor camping and dinners with candlelight.

I am sure I can think of some more...

and of course there is plenty of stuff I miss about WH being home, but that isnt what this thread is about, right?

Oooo, no more picking the acorns up out of the grass so they dont ruin it...(yeah that is what WH had me do). Now I just push them into the grass with my shoe and it feel soooo good...I dont care about the precious grass!