Good luck in court! I expect to see a very long post tomorrow after you get back detailing how you kick D!ck's butt!

Unfortunately, no long post needed. D!ck didn't even show up. Our attorneys did talk with the judge, but in the judge's chambers so I wasn't a part of the conversation.

And... as I predicted... D!ck is waiting for the credit card statements to arrive, per his attorney [guess he hasn't been fired YET]. And just as soon as those arrive, D!ck will happily turn them over. And the post-separation debt, per D!ck's attorney, was used to pay bills Holyheart ran up. And per my attorney, there's really nothing we can do about that right now since all the debt will be addressed in the settlement which can't be drafted without the credit card statements which we need D!ck to produce.

So I wasted a half day of my time (and new dress, shoes, hose, sweater) for NOTHING AGAIN.

I don't get it. For a man hell-bent on pushing the divorce -- who ONE YEAR AGO got PO'd at his own father for waiting three days to give me the papers because I was recouperating from a staph infection and FIL wanted to wait until after the kids attended their high school formal that weekend.....

Why is he stalling?

We all know the answer... he doesn't want his financial sins revealed for all the world to see. I mean, who doesn't want to hear of the banker involved in a scandal.... who lost his head over a little tail... who got himself in so much debt....who left his high school sweetheart and three teenagers for a bimbo....who got hooked on gambling and sexting and who knows what else...who.... the list goes on and on!!!

Oh.... the BIG news... ILs DISINHERITED HIM yesterday. Yep, it's all legal and official.

And... back to court... next time will be March. I just need to keep my head above water until then.

And --- I want to SO BAD (but I won't) to text Bimbo and say "Take my H, PLEASE. Tell D!ck to stop dragging his feet on this divorce. We need it done NOW. That way you and D!ck can get married and you, my dear, will assume ALL HIS DEBT. Have a good life. You two deserve each other."

AWESOME !!!!!!!

Awesome... but MIL cried while signing the papers. The paralegal said she was doing the right thing and, should D!ck change and come back into the fold, the papers can be changed again.

That made MIL feel better.

HH it's unbelievable how low these waywards can go! And definitely bless your MIL's heart for what she did. Please at least tell me the judge set another date, or at bare minimum, a deadline.

FWIW, my first XH treated court in a similar manner as this. He ignored the judges orders and asked for rediculous things. Eventually, he failed to show up one court date and the judge awarded me full custody with absolute say in whether I wanted to allow visitation of any form (he actually screwed up his supervised visitation with children's aid so that even THEY wouldn't put up with him and the judge decided if they can't do it then why should I be expected to). Give him enough rope, HH, and he'll hang himself with it. He's already tying the noose.

I agree with Tabby. Your Wh is just waiting for someone to knock over the box under his feet. He is dangerously close to a total disaster at this point. The sad thing is, you will be sucked into it for a period of time but you'll come out of it OK in the long run though.

((((((HH)))))))

HH,

Where in the heck are ya?

We're worried, HH!

No need to worry. Busy with family.

Busy in happy way...No?

Busy in a busy way.

Threw DD a 16th birthday party last weekend with 40 guests -- classmates, friends, family. DD asked for the party at the last minute, and I said YES. (OK... How could I say no? DS got a truck on his 16th bday and other DD got a car on her 16th bday. And there was no way this DD was getting a vehicle like her siblings -- thanks to D!ck and the D.) I put the party together quickly and on a budget -- with the help of both mine and D!ck's family. It felt GREAT to focus on a fun event for a change. DD was very happy!!! And D!ck was not consulted nor invited.

This past week I also ....
Went back to work.
Watched DD's two basketball games.
Went out to dinner three times.
Planted flowers.
Shopped with DDs for formal dresses.
Paid bills.
....just doing what I'm suppose to be doing.

Discovered a new recovery gage -- I ask myself "Am I where I'm suppose to be... doing what I'm suppose to be doing?"

As long as I'm where I'm suppose to be, doing what I'm suppose to be doing -- I'm OK and doing the right thing.

And as long as D!ck is NOT where he's suppose to be, doing what he's NOT suppose to be doing -- he's wayward and NOT OK.

My concern at the moment is taxes. D!ck NEEDS the deductions, I don't. My gut says that D!ck will be calling soon to ask my "cooperation." I'm learning. Any "deal with the devil" needs to be court approved since D!ck went back on his word last year and kept the entire refund to finance three trips to Vegas with bimbo.

Part of me says to file quickly and let D!ck get dinged with owing money. Another part says this might be a way to negotiate education dollars for the kids in exchange for him claiming them.

I'll be praying for guidance...

D!ck spent some time with the DDs yesterday. D!ck shared that his dog (the one he got a few months ago with Bimbo) was run over while playing with Bimbo's kids....in front of HIS house...and the dog was brought to THEIR bed....then died on the way to the vet.

DD16 said she wanted to punch D!ck for using references to HIS HOUSE and THEIR BED.

After DD told me this, I asked if she was all right -- especially since she's the biggest dog lover in the world. She says to me.... "Mom, it's called karma."

What a d!ck...

What was D@ck's dog name or drum roll please...

All I can do is hug you HH. Your WH is so screwed up. I'm glad that I am done with mine now. It really has given me peace.

Much love to you....

He dog-gone done it. Got another puppy. Found a photo on his email last night. So a replacement pup to go with his replacement wife to go with his replacement kids at his replacement house.

I give up.

So he just replaced it like that?

I hate to quote Jon from Garfield, but...

What? No period of mourning?

Of course no mourning, silly KR.

That would be too negative for them. See -- they're BIG fans of the Law of Attraction. Never harp on anything that will bring you down. You move onto the next opportunity as soon as you can.

That's the mentality I'm up against. That is why D!ck doesn't want to acknowledge his spending. He wants it all to go away. He'll put it out to the Universe to solve.

Interesting thing is -- and you can ask Hope to confirm -- about two weeks ago I was hit with a strong, obsessive thought about his dog. I was picking up dog food for my own dog and for some reason I kept thinking about his and her dog. And I said "that dog needs to die." And it became obsessive. And I even said to myself and repeated to Hope that should he ever wish to come home that I would ask him to kill the dog. I swear this was my thinking. That I would never want a connection -- the dog -- to remain between the two of them.

Now I know this sounds weird because I am the BIGGEST DOG LOVER so don't attack me for thinking this outrageous thought. And I shared this to Hope over the phone. I said I'm even shocked that I'm saying this to you, but I feel so strongly about this.

Then, a week later, D!ck tells the girls that he WATCHED his dog get run over. And -- even stranger -- he lives at the end of a culdesac. So it would be pretty hard to not see an approaching, slowing car entering the culdesac that you would let your dog get hit.

Maybe it was God. Maybe it was me putting my thoughts out to the Universe (ugh!) or maybe it was just me thinking about something that had already happened. Because, like it or not, I still feel a strong bond with D!ck and feel that I can sense his thoughts.

I just wish I knew WHEN the dog died so I'd know whether I predicted this, caused this indirectly, or felt this after the fact. The art of war -- know yourself and your strengths!!

HH,

If you have those powers, I'd like to hire you.