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Originally Posted by chickadee1
NW- ok me being super senstive i know, seems like my thread has the plague, did i offend?

Well, there was that rumor that your thread had the cooties, but...

Nah, just kidding smile

I think those of us on the "In Recovery" section can generally fend for ourselves so most of the help is directed at those floundering and trying to rationalize the actions of a wayward.

Mr. Amazed's thread is a good example. His WW just "got saved" but is witholding recovery until she finds out who told Mr. Amazed to expose. It kind of ticked her off, apparently, to be handed the Scarlet Letter.

We, seriously, should just make a post listing the fogbabble that betrayeds will hear and give it to them in advance.


Me (BH)
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thats funny, i term any weird thing that i get, cooties, so yes i do have the cooties. and i take no offense to it.

wow there is some stuff going on there! posted to that one you suggested, but nada... rmk is worrying me, sounds a bit familiar and i think there is more.... i also am hesitant about posting sometimes, dont want to say the wrong thing.

but then you see someone like confused and she is tearing thru this like a champ.

I guess when i am feeling crapy about something i come here and then i get crazy. but i really can talk to anyone about this, well maybe one friend, but its gotta get boring for them to hear- at some point they will say quit your moaning and get out.



Me 44- yes ugggh
WH 47
together 26 years M 19
serial cheater big time
DD1 2.24.11
NC letter sent 3/7/11
NC letter to OW2 april
final truths 5/8-- all of them poly confirmed 5/18
working the plan

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I think rmk can do it, it's just that fear thing that has to pop up first.

I, too, don't post often as I tend to get riled up and may say something too harsh. But some things you read on here just make you want to cuss. I'll have to look for 'confused' and see what that's about.

Feel free to complain all you want here--it's your thread after all! smile We've all got the lousy t-shirt, so at least you'll know that we get what you're talking about.


Me (BH)
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i agree!

i hang here for a bit and keep my mouth shut, its been not great shakes in my life this week and its still tuesday.

back to the no sleep can eat diet......

when i can get some sleep it all may not seem so bad



Me 44- yes ugggh
WH 47
together 26 years M 19
serial cheater big time
DD1 2.24.11
NC letter sent 3/7/11
NC letter to OW2 april
final truths 5/8-- all of them poly confirmed 5/18
working the plan

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Maybe a quick weekend trip is in order before winter hits? You guys shovel snow for, what, more months than you don't? crazy

We're going down to the coast for the weekend by ourselves--kids are going to grandparents. No real big plans, maybe eat too much seafood and sleep in late.





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well i cannot wait for this week to be over! too many bad days in one week!

H signed up for the forum. so we will see i think he is a lurker tho. should be interesting! i told him he couldnt post on mine in the public forum. when he on i will let y'all know.

i am making mental dates in my head for progress, while there has definately been progress, i need more at this time.

heavy discussion last night, i hope this really sinks in for him. its time to walk the talk.

the adele song "someone like you" is on everytime i get in the car, i dont know if it make me mad or not, but i am screaming it everytime, its like it could be from an OP, or BS whos moved on- or breaking plan B. strange




Me 44- yes ugggh
WH 47
together 26 years M 19
serial cheater big time
DD1 2.24.11
NC letter sent 3/7/11
NC letter to OW2 april
final truths 5/8-- all of them poly confirmed 5/18
working the plan

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Originally Posted by chickadee1
the adele song "someone like you" is on everytime i get in the car, i dont know if it make me mad or not, but i am screaming it everytime, its like it could be from an OP, or BS whos moved on- or breaking plan B. strange

It was on the other day and my wife was listening to it. I couldn't help but wonder if she was thinking of the a-hole at the time.

I remarked that it was a depressing song and changed the station. I don't think she noticed and I was probably overthinking it.

It sounds like I heard it different than you, but I hate that freaking song. The weirdest things are triggers sometimes. Kind of crazy, I guess.

Have a good weekend, chickadee.



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Originally Posted by Northwood8900
Originally Posted by chickadee1
the adele song "someone like you" is on everytime i get in the car, i dont know if it make me mad or not, but i am screaming it everytime, its like it could be from an OP, or BS whos moved on- or breaking plan B. strange

It was on the other day and my wife was listening to it. I couldn't help but wonder if she was thinking of the a-hole at the time.

I remarked that it was a depressing song and changed the station. I don't think she noticed and I was probably overthinking it.

It sounds like I heard it different than you, but I hate that freaking song. The weirdest things are triggers sometimes. Kind of crazy, I guess.


I love Adele, but if you really listen to the lyrics of the songs on that CD, the whole thing is depressing. The song "Don't You Remember" tears me up. I finally took it out of my CD player in the car and replaced it with something else.

FWIW, when I hear "Someone Like You," I think about my BH moving on, finding someone else who made his "dreams come true," someone who gave him what I couldn't give to him, my fidelity.


FWW

"Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough." ~ Earl Wilson
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That song bugs me too. "Sometimes it lasts in love and sometimes it hurts instead."

Not really good MB material there. Ha! Though a song about EPs and ENs probably wouldn't be a No. 1 hit, either! ha!

And here's a {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{WPG}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}.

Next time, I'm sure you'll get it right.

Cheers,
SP


Me: 47
BH: 48, previously married
Married: Nov. 27, 2004
DDay: Nov. 13, 2010
Kids: stepsons DS17 and DS13
http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=postlist&Board=35
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not good MB material any way you look at it.. she is a great artist, no doubt. but i think the song hits different people different ways, sometimes i hear it amd i think i could sing it to H as i am moving on. other times i thing thats it bunny bunner. so i guess thats why it is a hit- take it any way- it works for all

wpg- thanks for the post - please help my H as he is making his first post. uggh this may be more than i asked for, but the better for him to learn and hear what other say.


Me 44- yes ugggh
WH 47
together 26 years M 19
serial cheater big time
DD1 2.24.11
NC letter sent 3/7/11
NC letter to OW2 april
final truths 5/8-- all of them poly confirmed 5/18
working the plan

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Just wanted to drop a note, H is posting... someone posted something that stuck with him...

he actually said, for this first time that he appreciated that i have stuck with him and thank you. wow big deposits for me.

so thank you for helping him help me.


Me 44- yes ugggh
WH 47
together 26 years M 19
serial cheater big time
DD1 2.24.11
NC letter sent 3/7/11
NC letter to OW2 april
final truths 5/8-- all of them poly confirmed 5/18
working the plan

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Whether he means my post or not, you'd better believe I haven't finished with him yet!


BW
Married 1989
His PA 2003-2006
2 kids.
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thank you. i think its helping him see things in a different light.

you read the book take the class and go thru the coaching but it nice to have people who understand to bounce things off of.


Me 44- yes ugggh
WH 47
together 26 years M 19
serial cheater big time
DD1 2.24.11
NC letter sent 3/7/11
NC letter to OW2 april
final truths 5/8-- all of them poly confirmed 5/18
working the plan

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Originally Posted by SugarCane
Whether he means my post or not, you'd better believe I haven't finished with him yet!

I think it was yours....well worded


Me -BS 40
Him - FWH 34 (dtl)
3 D-Days from 12/25/10 to 01/06/11
NC - 01/09/11
02/20/12 done beating my head on that wall.
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Originally Posted by LuvsDavid
I think it was yours....well worded
Apart from the "jerky" error, that is...

Cheers, LuvsDavid!

I've a few choice words for your H, too!



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Thank u.


Me -BS 40
Him - FWH 34 (dtl)
3 D-Days from 12/25/10 to 01/06/11
NC - 01/09/11
02/20/12 done beating my head on that wall.
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So glad that your H started posting here and getting the help and support he needs. We've been counselling with Jennifer too but we haven't registered for the online seminar. How do you guys like it?


Me: BS/FWW - 38
BH/FWH - 36
Married 13 years, together 17 years
Two boys: 9 & 12
OW#1 DDay: PA Nov 26, 2009 (July 2008-July 2009)
OW#2 DDay: PA Nov 29, 2009 (May 2009-Sept 2009)

Me: EA/PA (RA?) June 2010-Sept 2010
His DDay: Oct 2010
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i like it, but it tough just bc of time. i have read the books so that makes it easy because i reading as a review. the audio is hard because i have no commute- my drives anywhere are short. i loved jennifer it was a good foundation and the best way to jump start this.

its about scheduling.

I am surprised that he is posting and keeping up he seems to be enjoying it. but last night he spent 2 hours of prime time on. he cannot post and chat at the same time- its a very fcused effort. but if thats a LB i'll take it. he is gaining alot in a short period of time.



Me 44- yes ugggh
WH 47
together 26 years M 19
serial cheater big time
DD1 2.24.11
NC letter sent 3/7/11
NC letter to OW2 april
final truths 5/8-- all of them poly confirmed 5/18
working the plan

Joined: Feb 2011
Posts: 581
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He is getting good advice and im hoping my husband is reading it also because alot of it applies to him also.

Give him a hug for his effort.


Me -BS 40
Him - FWH 34 (dtl)
3 D-Days from 12/25/10 to 01/06/11
NC - 01/09/11
02/20/12 done beating my head on that wall.
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Hey, Dee? If your H wants to plan out a day for the two of you, will you promise me that you'll let him do it and not try to control the day? That you'll just go with it and enjoy the experience?



D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!

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