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Well, it's been a while since I posted and things have progressed to the point that we can truly say that we have a new and improved marriage. My wife is still doing everything possible to prove her continued trustworthiness, respect and love, and she is also working very hard to regain her self-esteem, which has the added positive effect of lessening her depression. I'm doing very well myself, and sometimes can go days without thinking of the affair. My oldest daughter will be married next month, and my younger girl is re-bonding with her mother, so our kids seem to have weathered the storm very well. Certain aspects of our recovery are becoming a part of our renewed commitment ot each other. Every month she asks if I want her to take another polygraph, but I haven't felt the need since March, and doubt if I will do it again. We are two completely different people now and have a relationship that is uncanny in it's depth and intensity. I now feel like she is completely mine in a way that I never felt , even before the affair. I am so thankful for MB and all it has taught us. We have returned to church and my wife now takes communion with a glad but humble heart and I can say to everybody here, that I DO have a wife to be proud of.
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IDK if this post belongs here or in the recovery forum, but I wanted all of those posters who have been so helpful to know how much better things are with us, and how much I appreciate all of the help that you guys have given me.
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Well, it's been a while since I posted and things have progressed to the point that we can truly say that we have a new and improved marriage. My wife is still doing everything possible to prove her continued trustworthiness, respect and love, and she is also working very hard to regain her self-esteem, which has the added positive effect of lessening her depression. I'm doing very well myself, and sometimes can go days without thinking of the affair. My oldest daughter will be married next month, and my younger girl is re-bonding with her mother, so our kids seem to have weathered the storm very well. Certain aspects of our recovery are becoming a part of our renewed commitment ot each other. Every month she asks if I want her to take another polygraph, but I haven't felt the need since March, and doubt if I will do it again. We are two completely different people now and have a relationship that is uncanny in it's depth and intensity. I now feel like she is completely mine in a way that I never felt , even before the affair. I am so thankful for MB and all it has taught us. We have returned to church and my wife now takes communion with a glad but humble heart and I can say to everybody here, that I DO have a wife to be proud of. Congrats to you!! It is always nice to hear about recovered marriages.
FWW/BW (me) WH 2nd M for both Blended Family with 7 kids between us Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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It is wonderful. And she is so repentant! Wow, if only every BH here could have such a repentant and eager FWW!
One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger
I will not spend my life this way.
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Always glad to read of a positive update MM. Thanks for taking the time out to inspire others and educate on what a truly repentant (F)WS should be like...
Me (BW): 35 Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.
WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it. Plan B has set me free.
"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."
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Thanks for the update, mirrormirror!
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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IDK if this post belongs here or in the recovery forum, but I wanted all of those posters who have been so helpful to know how much better things are with us, and how much I appreciate all of the help that you guys have given me. Awesome update, MM! As far as your question for placement; add your updates to your previous threads. That way, when new posters arrive in crisis they can see the flow of recovery you have gone through! So, here's the next question; have you started to reach that point where following MB principles is natural? That's one thing some people fight against; they feel that getting some of these things feels "forced." Yet, the layout of the program is not about "following rules" it is about creating habits!
"An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." - Niels Bohr
"Smart people believe weird things because they are skilled at defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons." - Michael Shermer
"Fair speech may hide a foul heart." - Samwise Gamgee LOTR
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HHH, thanks, I will do that , in the future. The longer we go, the more natural it becomes. At first, she was more able to adopt the MB principles as a lifestyle change, than I was. I guess, it was because of her remorse, and shame, that brought home to her that she needed to find a new way of living, or lose me and our family. Now we both practice all fo the MB principles on a daily basis and it seems as natural as tying your shoes. We have our F&T time every day. (Fun and together)and our communication is 1,000,000 times better than before.
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HHH, thanks, I will do that , in the future. The longer we go, the more natural it becomes. At first, she was more able to adopt the MB principles as a lifestyle change, than I was. I guess, it was because of her remorse, and shame, that brought home to her that she needed to find a new way of living, or lose me and our family. Now we both practice all fo the MB principles on a daily basis and it seems as natural as tying your shoes. We have our F&T time every day. (Fun and together)and our communication is 1,000,000 times better than before. Thank you for the testimony, brother.
"An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." - Niels Bohr
"Smart people believe weird things because they are skilled at defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons." - Michael Shermer
"Fair speech may hide a foul heart." - Samwise Gamgee LOTR
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IDK if this post belongs here or in the recovery forum, but I wanted all of those posters who have been so helpful to know how much better things are with us, and how much I appreciate all of the help that you guys have given me. You've made me very happy. Thank you for the update Tell Mrs M Pep says "Hey gurl".
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That's another thing. I think that with some coaxing from me, that maybe she will come here and post in the recovery forum. She doesn't want to post in the infidelity one as it makes her cry, but the recovery forum is something she is interested in, she has been lurking for a while now. LOL
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