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Joined: Jul 2012
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Is there a reason for that ? Has any of you done it? For example when you feel you are moving on and you don't whant the WS to believe that he can still feed from your pain?
I mean stay in PB but with no expectation. To make him see that you are not there even if agrees to NC.


Me: BW, 41
WH: 46
Married 7 years, together 12
DD: 5
OW: 39
D-Day: 11 April
Plan B since 10/3/12
Divorced 11/12
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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I don't understand the questions

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That YOU ARE NOT WAITING ANYMORE


Me: BW, 41
WH: 46
Married 7 years, together 12
DD: 5
OW: 39
D-Day: 11 April
Plan B since 10/3/12
Divorced 11/12
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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You mean to write a plan B letter and say you want nothing to do with him?

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To ask for the first one to be given back to you if the conditions don't apply anymore. I mean If you don't want to show that you are still waiting


Me: BW, 41
WH: 46
Married 7 years, together 12
DD: 5
OW: 39
D-Day: 11 April
Plan B since 10/3/12
Divorced 11/12
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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No. I think that just opens a door to communication.
If the conditions don't apply write a new plan b letter

I gave my wife a plan b text on the day of divorce.

You are in Greece, yes?
Drink some ouzo before you send it.
Then after you send it burn every thing he left lol

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You mean soak everything in ouzo and then burn it right? LOL


Me: BW, 41
WH: 46
Married 7 years, together 12
DD: 5
OW: 39
D-Day: 11 April
Plan B since 10/3/12
Divorced 11/12
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
You may want to start a thread in te Divorced section now

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How did you find Marriage builders from Greece?

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I have seen others getting divorce and keeping the thread here. I am not ready for the D section. Sometimes I like to bring some humor in the whole situation I am sorry for this


Me: BW, 41
WH: 46
Married 7 years, together 12
DD: 5
OW: 39
D-Day: 11 April
Plan B since 10/3/12
Divorced 11/12
Joined: Jul 2012
Posts: 167
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Posts: 167
And we STILL have Internet in Greece!


Me: BW, 41
WH: 46
Married 7 years, together 12
DD: 5
OW: 39
D-Day: 11 April
Plan B since 10/3/12
Divorced 11/12
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
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Originally Posted by Faithnomore
To ask for the first one to be given back to you if the conditions don't apply anymore. I mean If you don't want to show that you are still waiting

No, if you are moving on then filing for divorce will tell him that. The divorce papers will tell him you are not waiting.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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p.s. and if he ever contacts your IM wanting to reconcile, you can just say that option is no longer open. But if he never asks, there is no reason to tell him.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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But my PBL was given to him POST filing (which was when plan B started) Still it was a love letter.


Me: BW, 41
WH: 46
Married 7 years, together 12
DD: 5
OW: 39
D-Day: 11 April
Plan B since 10/3/12
Divorced 11/12
Joined: Nov 2011
Posts: 11,239
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Posts: 11,239
Are you keeping busy with your 5 year old?
I have a 6 year old

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Originally Posted by Faithnomore
But my PBL was given to him POST filing (which was when plan B started) Still it was a love letter.

Well, if he EVER inquires about it you can just tell him reconciliation is not on the table. Otherwise, there is no reason to tell him.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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I take satisfaction in knowing, as soon as the OW starts lovebusting, WH will logically think of me, my Plan A and the offer I laid out in PBL.

It no longer stands... but I have no reason to let him know this. Like exposure is the gift that keeps on giving... I see the PBL does this too. None of us know when the A will fail... but it will. And the PBL will help it die because just as the A started using the OW as a new point of comparison to the BS, so too when the A starts to die, will the OW again be compared to the BS... but not so favourably now the bloom has worn off.

And all of this happens, regardless of whether the BS is interested in marital recovery or not.


Me (BW): 35
Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.

WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it.

Plan B has set me free.

"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."

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