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OP
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I used to think my relationship with my wife of 21 years could withstand any baptism of fire, seduction whatsoever. After all, I went oversea for my tertiary education and had been a morally upright man, being objective of what I was there for.
I've work hard, and became a successful manager back home but marriage life had somehow lost its spark, romances though we still shower together since day one.
So came one day, I finally agreed to meet up with one of my rich and attractive supplier which I had always rejected the dinner invitation...
All it takes was 3 bottles of wine and now I am in this state..
Marriage is almost ruined. I very much regretted accepting the invitation and should not had gone out one on one...
Still very much is suffering. My partner is also suffering... sighed..
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Joined: Sep 2008
Posts: 9,544 Likes: 9
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I used to think my relationship with my wife of 21 years could withstand any baptism of fire, seduction whatsoever. After all, I went oversea for my tertiary education and had been a morally upright man, being objective of what I was there for.
I've work hard, and became a successful manager back home but marriage life had somehow lost its spark, romances though we still shower together since day one.
So came one day, I finally agreed to meet up with one of my rich and attractive supplier which I had always rejected the dinner invitation...
All it takes was 3 bottles of wine and now I am in this state..
Marriage is almost ruined. I very much regretted accepting the invitation and should not had gone out one on one...
Still very much is suffering. My partner is also suffering... sighed.. Welcome to MB. Your post is rather cryptic. "All it takes was 3 bottles of wine and now I am in this state" - what state? Could you please describe clearly what has happened in your marriage, and what help you are seeking? That would help us to approach the problem accurately.
BW
Married 1989
His PA 2003-2006
2 kids.
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Joined: Nov 2012
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OP
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I've confided everything to my wife of 21 years. It broke her heart deeply. She's terribly hurt but ultimately, she chose to forgave me.
The state which I mentioned was between withdrawal and trying to recover. We did not had sex, but heavy petting and kissing. Nearly had sex though.. I am still struggling to overcome the withdrawals but working hard towards recovery which I hoped it won't be futile.
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OP
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We hit it so well. My attractive supplier marital woes was the exact opposite of mine. So from admiration, attraction and confiding... one thing leads to another..
I had some frustrations with my wife of 21 years. She literally stop progressing intellectually after high school and conversational wise, we didn't do too well. Lots of gaps I suppose.
Not helped when I pursue aggressively into the tertiary level and worked in a high tech industry..
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Proposition,
We did not had sex, but heavy petting and kissing.
Do not say this to your BW, modify it it WE HAD SEX. If you BW was not getting affection from you for years, then the statement that kissing is not sex is insulting and hurtful.
In fact kissing is so intimate, that often passionate kissing ends before intercourse and other "real sex" slows down in a marriage.
God Bless
Gamma
Last edited by Gamma; 11/26/12 10:33 AM.
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Proposition,
What are you hoping to accomplish here at Marriage Builders? Are you wanting to recover your marriage, make it better than it ever was? What is your goal?
AM
BW - 70
WH - 65
M - 35 years
D-day - 17 Apr 08
H broke contact 11/1/09
Back in love after the worst thing that every happened to us.
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I had some frustrations with my wife of 21 years. She literally stop progressing intellectually after high school and conversational wise, we didn't do too well. Lots of gaps I suppose. Not helped when I pursue aggressively into the tertiary level and worked in a high tech industry.. Don't say this to her. You are putting her down for not having certain characteristics, thus you went for another woman that had those characteristics. Well guess what? There isn't one single person on this planet who has every positive characteristic that exists. We are all individual units that carry our load of the whole. The OW is missing all the characteristics your wife has that made you say, "I do.". Also, the OW carries the characteristic of CHEATER, something that hasn't been shown to exist in your wife.
Last edited by GoingUphill; 11/27/12 10:18 AM.
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I pursue aggressively into the tertiary level and worked in a Translate please.
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I had some frustrations with my wife of 21 years. She literally stop progressing intellectually after high school Well that is a mean thing to say. LITERALLY. She literally did not progress, and a Dr would state that she thinks as a 17 year old would. She has not progressed one iota. and conversational wise, we didn't do too well. Lots of gaps I suppose. Quite frankly, proposition, YOU are difficult to converse with. You twist the English language in a way to make yourself appear to be highly intellectual, when in reality nobody knows what the hxxl you are talking about. But what do I know, I'm just a dumb SAHM who hasn't probably progressed intellectually for the last decade.
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I've confided everything to my wife of 21 years. It broke her heart deeply. She's terribly hurt but ultimately, she chose to forgave me. Please advise your wife to come here, we can help her learn how to recover her marriage using the MB plan. What have you done to EARN her forgiveness?
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