I'm not sure i understand about brainstorming solutions. Aren't EPs nonnegotiable? Anyway, for what it's worth, the original EP was to let me see his emails when he looked at them. This went to Hell in a hand basket. He would go into the kitchen and, with his back to me, look at his emails. After several days of this, and my requesting that he not look at his emails without me, and his disregarding my requests, I took it upon myself to change his PW. Now, he CAN'T check w/o my being right there with him. So, he behaved himself into the present circumstances that he hates. Oh WELL!!

My H sent only the one post in which he ID'd himself. He started a thread some time ago after my repeated requests. He felt bombarded with negativity, so would not respond. I doubt he will in the future.

I am the husband. I admit that I had an emotional affair with my ex. She wanted
To get back together and said she was going to re-marry otherwise. I did not care- in fact
It seemed a good idea. My critical mistake was to continue to talk with her about her problems behind my wife's back. Had I just stopped talking with my ex, most of our current problems could have been avoided and been better for my ex as well. At the time I rationalized that we never lived closer than 800 miles. The second "emotional affair" was with a female co-worker I worked with on and off for about 8 years. At times we did discuss our personal relationships but mostly it was about catching up with each other on what others we knew were doing. A few times we ate lunch together in the company cafeteria, but others were eating with us. That relationship ended 10 years ago. I will admit that those in the forum who call me an [censored] and a jerk are right. I am trying to live up to me wife's EPs, but I believe they are excessive considering how long ago these things happened. I do resent having to ask my wife to use my phone and check e-mail. My solution was to try giving me a phone that has no other function. That way I can use the phone without asking permission and she can check on-line to see all calls to and from the phone. That is unacceptable. One iis not supposed to negotiate EPs once established.