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Joined: Aug 2013
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Recently went to a grocery store together and they were giving out food samples. I walked up to my husband who was waiting in the sample line and was holding a sandwich sample and I said 'oh, that looks good'....the food sample lady pipes up and says..'of course, i made it'.....my H then says to the sample lady .."do you come with the sandwich, too?". She then responded....'sir, I am offended by that statement!".....I looked at my husband and said..."I AM TOO!" and walked on to continue the shopping. He then stays in line for his sample and then comes over to me and says...I didn't hear what she said....(he has complete hearing loss in one ear which is true)and then proceeds to tell me that the sample lady didn't quit...she kept on with the coming on to him statements. I asked him to sit down so we could talk...I asked him how does he think that makes me feel when he is making those types statements to other women? He says I shouldn't be so upset and know that he doesn't mean anything by them. I told him that I was glad she said what she did because it demonstrates my point....that women do consider those types of comments as a man coming on to her!!!!!
Looking for feedback....am I to sensitive or is my H out of line??? Seeing a counselor regarding these types of problems soon.

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Originally Posted By: 30plusyears
Recently went to a grocery store together and they were giving out food samples. I walked up to my husband who was waiting in the sample line and was holding a sandwich sample and I said 'oh, that looks good'....the food sample lady pipes up and says..'of course, i made it'.....my H then says to the sample lady .."do you come with the sandwich, too?". She then responded....'sir, I am offended by that statement!".....I looked at my husband and said..."I AM TOO!" and walked on to continue the shopping. He then stays in line for his sample and then comes over to me and says...I didn't hear what she said....(he has complete hearing loss in one ear which is true)and then proceeds to tell me that the sample lady didn't quit...she kept on with the coming on to him statements. I asked him to sit down so we could talk...I asked him how does he think that makes me feel when he is making those types statements to other women? He says I shouldn't be so upset and know that he doesn't mean anything by them. I told him that I was glad she said what she did because it demonstrates my point....that women do consider those types of comments as a man coming on to her!!!!!
Looking for feedback....am I to sensitive or is my H out of line??? Seeing a counselor regarding these types of problems soon.


Your H's comment was very inappropriate for a married man and very offensive to most women on the receiving end.

Have you read about the Policy of Joint Agreement? A great marriage has the POJA as the foundation: Never do anything without the enthusiastic agreement of your spouse.

So, even IF no one agrees with you, if it bothers YOU, and you complain to your husband, then he should STOP doing it. The reason he should stop doing it is because every time he does something that bothers you, you lose love for him. If he cares about you, he will care that you are losing love for him. He will care that you are upset about something he is doing.

A married man should never ever flirt. It's an extraordinary precaution that will help protect your marriage.

Please don't bother with marriage counseling. Most MCs are useless. You would be better off posting here with your questions, reading the articles here, listening the radio show and buying the MB books His Needs, Her Needs and Love Busters. Most MCs have absolutely NO idea how to create a plan to restore romantic love in a marriage and many don't even believe it can be done.

Has your H had any affairs? Does he have the habit of flirting?


Married 1980
DDay Nov 2010

Recovered thanks to Marriage Builders
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Agree with everything LongWay posted to you.

Originally Posted By: 30plusyears

Looking for feedback....am I to sensitive or is my H out of line???


No, you are not being too sensitive. That was way out of line and in addition, it sounds like your H is dismissing your complaint about his behavior which just adds insult to injury.

Please answer the questions about the history of infidelity in your M so that we can give you more guidance.


Ddays 2007 and 2011
Plan B 6/21/11
Divorced July 2012
2 kids
How to Plan B Correctly
Parallel Parenting in Plan B

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