Yes, but it doesn't mean he should be rubbing his affair in your face.

I will say it again, you should move out and file for Divorce.

Jenna,

1st affair OM

2nd affair OM

3rd affair OM when you moved out with OM

4th affair, started dating again just to make him interested in me again.

Ouch, it would have been better had your H killed OM back at affair 1. You put your H through a number of false recoveries which are real killers on trust.

You need to work on yourself and not date anyone for any reason for about 2-3 years. Read up on MB, it may be too late for your marriage, but not too late for you.

God Bless
Gamma

That's the truth, Gamma.

Jenna,
Learn about marriage from Dr. Harley by reading his books. Work on yourself and become a buyer. You might start by reading [/u]Buyers, Renters, and Freeloaders.[u][u][/u]

Have you read his articles on this site? That would be a good place to start.

Please read.
Buyers, Renters and Freeloaders

I had a long talk with my husband. This is what he said:

"Please don't consider the legal document as an evidence of our marriage. Our marriage was over when you walked out on the kids. Why do you even want me back. My relationship with (OMW) which you consider an affair wouldn't have been an affair if I could just divorce you or even move out which can't happen in our limited income. I am truly sorry for not making enough money to resolve the situation. Me and the children have always tried not to burden you with any of our responsibilities. We wash our own clothes, do our own dishes, cook ourselves. Still if we have caused you any inconvenience I apologize again. "

Whatever he said is true. They won't let me do any of their work. I have cooked for them so many days, only for them to say they want to eat something else or they are not hungry.

Is there really any hope at all?

How soon can you move out?

Hope within this week. I'll have look for an apartment.

Why wait for him to divorce you if you are both dating other people ?
He may just want to get it over with and you can get a cheap divorce for like $300 if you do it yourself.
Have you asked him to do a divorce paperwork packet with you?

That would be better than depleting the kids college accounts

My impression is that your husband and children have experienced so much pain from your betrayals and abandonment, that they have figuratively built a wall to protect themselves. You didn't come back because you all of a sudden realized how much you loved them and missed them; you came back because you exhausted your other options, and wanted to see if there was anything left to salvage. They were your last choice, and they know it. If the only way they can feel safe around you is to keep their (emotional) distance, then I think the least you can do is to respect that.

Jenna, did you get the Surviving an Affair book? Get it and read through it.

The crap about not having enough money to divorce is a cop out. Is does not entitle him to parade another woman around you under your nose. People can invent all kinds of rationalizations for having an affair but it doesn't make it any less painful. If he doesn't stop this you are going to need to protect yourself by separation, because this kind of trauma will eventually effect you in a very severe way.