Sir, you need to post more details if you want advice.
What do you mean he chose his wife?
Did you post these OM on www.cheaterville.com?

(From SAA, page 58)

OM,
I want you to know that out of respect and love for my H and children, I have come to realize that I must never see or talk with you again. My relationship with you was a cruel indulgence that H did not deserve. While I cannot completely repay H for the pain I have caused him, I will do my best to become the wife he has been missing. I care a gread deal for miy family and I would not want to do anything to risk their happiness. I will not make any further contact with you and I do not want you to make any contact with me. Please respect my desire to end our relationship.

Sincerely,

The above has been done via text, with her number changed shortly after.
So if no counciling, what is the next step?

The above has been done via text, with her number changed shortly after.
So if no counciling, what is the next step?

No I don't have the book, yes, sent to both, and I will listen to the clip now

From Surviving an Affair, pg 66-67

The extraordinary precautions do more than end marriage-threatening affairs; they help a couple form the kind of relationship they always wanted.

These recommendations may seem rigid, unnecessarily confining, and even paranoid to those who have not been the victim of infidelity. But people like Sue and Jon, who have suffered unimaginable pain as a result of an affair that spun out of control, can easily see their value. For the inconvenience of following my advice, Sue would have spared herself and Jon the very worst experience of their lives.


Checklist for How Affairs Should End

_____The unfaithful spouse should reveal information about the affair to the betrayed spouse.

_____The unfaithful spouse should make a commitment to the betrayed spouse to never see or talk to the lover OP again.

_____The unfaithful spouse should write a letter to the lover OP ending the relationship and send it with the approval of the betrayed spouse.

_____The unfaithful spouse should take extraordinary precautions to guarantee total separation from the lover OP:

_____Block potential communication with the lover OP (change e-mail address and home and cell phone numbers, and close all social networking accounts; have voice messages and mail monitored by the betrayed spouse).

_____Account for time (betrayed spouse and wayward spouse give each other a twenty-four-hour daily schedule with locations and telephone numbers).

_____Account for money (betrayed spouse and wayward spouse give each other a complete account of all money spent).

_____Spend leisure time together.

_____Change jobs and relocate if necessary.

_____Avoid overnight separation.

_____Allow technical accountability.

_____ Expose affair to family members, clergy, and/or friends.

So there has been no contact, since last Thursday. The past 3or 4 days my ww has been saying she loves me, and wants to work through this. That she is commited, and will do anything to make things right.
Now today, she is saying that she is not 100% commited, and don't think we should continue. She says it has nothing to do with him. Is this just part of the withdraw talking? What do I do?

So what do I do give her a little space now?

Yes we have been spending a lot of time together, there has been a lot of honesty, no dates because I just got laid off, and don't have the extra money. Last night she told me she does love me, and never stoped, but right now she is heart broken over him and doesn't feel like she is in love with me. No she is not on ad.
She saying the past week that she felt she felt she could work this out with me, and the past 2 days she has not felt like that. She has been saying I love you and today she says I can't force her, and she does not feel she is in love with me and is unhappy. But a week ago it was she was unhappy because her feelings were blocked by him.

And we went to lunch with the kids a few times, and been talking.

Well, kids go to bed, and we been sitting on the couch snuggled up, except last night. We had relations in bed though. Tonight we are eating together, after kids go to bed. I mentioned ads last night she said she doesn't need them, but she feels a little depressed. She won't go on them, cause she was on them before, and had bad expierence.
She said she will still go to counciling, but just doesn't want to try, and I need to accept she isn't in love with me. I told her I love her earlier, and I got stop trying to force me. I don't get it. I have seen her phone, and know 100% there has been no contact. She would not even go anywhere alone and has been saying she doesn't want to be alone.